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This has always been a popular topic on some other forums, discussion on what age is appropriate for a teenager to move out. A lot of the decision is based on where someone lives (cost of living). A lot of parents have trouble 'letting go' of children they've raised. But when is a good time to kick them to the curb?
I'm interested in how other people feel about this.
Last edited by Frankie117; 07-09-2008 at 03:08 PM..
I posted on another thread recently with a similar question I think.
Anyway, I moved out when I was 17. I'd quit school, got my GED, had a job, and shortly after moving out started some community college classes. My mom is a bit insane though. I would not have moved out so young if she hadn't been so psychotic.
My guess is that my son will move out around 18 or 19. We've talked about it and I've told him that after high school he doesn't have to move out right away but he must either be working or in college. Of course I prefer college. We'll see what happens.
We've talked about putting a small wooden building in back (they sell those shed-like structures that are wired for electric, have windows, basically a little cabin) in the rear of our property and letting him rent it from us, or live there rent free if he's in school. He likes that idea and it would give him some adult freedom and privacy without having to "move out" on his own if he's still in school.
Since I will most likely NOT be able to pay for all of his college tuition, it seems reasonable to me to let him live here while he's in school, as long as he doesn't make a "career" out of school.
Whenever you're ready. My situation is much similar to Fierce's: quit school and I took the GED test last month. Waiting for the results. Don't/didn't get along with my mom. Moving in October.
I voted 18, which is my age, but I'd say whenever you're ready as long as you're not almost 30 or something! I believe most people move out when they are about 20, but of course a lot of people do it before then.
I guess I should go ahead and throw my opinion into the ring as well.
I believe the appropriate age is 19. At 18, you are old enough to stand on your own, but it isn't easy getting started at that age. Back in high school I knew a few other students who were living away from home at the age of 16, and it didn't turn out so well for them. 17 is a bit too young because you would most likely be in high school, and working part time just doesn't pay the bills.
A lot of teens who move out before they're ready end up getting into a lot more than they can handle. It is much better to think things through before making rash decisions, especially ones that could possibly affect your life adversely.
I voted 19, my mother and stepfather actually kind of forced me to move out because they picked up and moved to Florida when I was 18, so I didn't have much of a choice, however I was fortunate enough to have a great-grandma who is terrific and let me live with her for 2 years until I was ready to really be on my own. When I was 20, I had my own apartment (no roommates, thank God), I was in college full time and working as a waitress full time. It was great, I'm so glad that I had that time when I was really on my own. I know a lot of women who never had that opportunity and it is so important to know that you can take care of yourself no matter what, there is no subsitute for independence.
I think it is also sort of a cultural thing as well, a lot of my Latin friends stayed with their parents until they were married, like late 20s and it was perfectly normal.
I could not imagine
As long as my kid is in school or working and paying his own way, he can live here as long as he'd like. I've got 6 kids; three are adults. The 29 year old lives a few miles away. The 26 year old is home now after living in Hawaii for 3 years. The 19 year old is at home while preparing to get his GED but he's also remodeling our garage (at his expense) to turn it into an apartment.
I like my kids so I'm not anxious for them to leave.
I voted 21 and over because in this day and age, high-paying jobs require a college education. The only way to live on your own while going to college is to go away to college and live in the dorm. The drawback is that you still have to come back home to your parents for Christmas and summer breaks. Assuming you are studying for a 4-year degree, you would normally be finished with college by age 22.
Sometimes even having a college degree isn't going to guarantee you a high-paying job. In my case, I am legally blind (totally blind in my right eye and partially-sighted in my left eye). So, it took me longer to finish my college education (4 years to get my 2-year degree and 5 years to get my 4-year degree). My disability is one reason why my chances of getting hired are slim.
I agree that living at home as an adult is a cultural thing. My mom is Filipino, and in that culture, it is customary to live at home until you are married. My uncle (my mom's brother) also lives with my mom and I.
in our culture people dont really move out until they get married. its more modern now, but still, we are not expected to leave the house at 18.
the parents would not really ask the children to leave. if the "kids" want to leave, its their decision and only for good reason.
i have one cousin who moved out of his home last year and he was 28! i guess he figured it was time to leave the nest.
I chose 18 solely based on a child that will not be going to college (which mine are). My son will only be 17 when he graduates high school. There is a university in our city, so if he goes there, he will be welcome to stay in the house. If any of my children go off to college, this is obviously a non-issue.
If any of my kids decide not to go to college (or drop out at any time) they can live with me long enough to get a job (which, trust me, I will be very proactively involved in!!) and save enough for a down on an apartment.
I love my kids, but as I've said in the past... it's my responsibility to teach them to be a contributing, functioning part of society. If they can't start it at 18 (not be perfect, but be ready to try), then I've failed somewhere as a parent.
I chose 18 solely based on a child that will not be going to college (which mine are). My son will only be 17 when he graduates high school. There is a university in our city, so if he goes there, he will be welcome to stay in the house. If any of my children go off to college, this is obviously a non-issue.
If any of my kids decide not to go to college (or drop out at any time) they can live with me long enough to get a job (which, trust me, I will be very proactively involved in!!) and save enough for a down on an apartment.
I love my kids, but as I've said in the past... it's my responsibility to teach them to be a contributing, functioning part of society. If they can't start it at 18 (not be perfect, but be ready to try), then I've failed somewhere as a parent.
I agree 100% with you. (tried to give you some reps, but I guess I have to spread some more around first!)
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