stay home moms no retirement?

[slcmo]

Originally Posted by mari4him

I don't think that is a dumb question at all, and it is a concern for many stay at home moms.

3 1/2 years ago when I seperated from my ex-husband, I found myself having this concern for the very first time in my life. We had been together for 16 years. During about 90% of our marriage I was a SAHM. I raised our 2 children, homeschooling 1 of them, and even raised his daughter from a previous marriage who spent a majority of time with us especially during the pre-school and elementary years.

My ex is in law enforcement and therefore had a very nice retirement plan that was intended for "our" future. At the time of working out our settlement agreement for the divorce, he told me not to touch his pension because he worked hard for that, I said "and what was I doing all these years twirling my thumbs?" He then said it was all he had for retirement and what if he remarried. I remember saying to him "and what exactly do I have being that I haven't been working, and if you remarry, your new wife is none of my concern, she had no part in nor has any right to the money that is in there now."

In the end I waived my rights to it for the time being so long as I remained beneficiary on behalf of our children until the youngest reaches 21. Once that occurs, I guess I'll have to see what options I have available, if any. In hindsight, I see that I may not have made the right decision back then, but with all that was going on and the emotion of it all, it just seemed the quickest and easiest way to end the bickering.

I too have enough points to receive some social security upon retirement, however, due to the low income and short years of working, at retirement age I would get about $152 a month. Not even enough to buy groceries.

Fortunately, I am in college pursuing my degree and plan to re-enter the workforce in the future, hopefully building up my retirement. However, this is a very good and important question for all SAHM's or SAHD's to ask themselves because one never knows what the future holds.

so sorry to hear what happened with your ex. I feel so sad when reading your words, I hope all is well with you and god bless you!

[slcmo]

Originally Posted by findinghope

first off i got my full social security points after working full time for 10 yrs. i didnt stop working, but i am saying its possible to make enough points in that time.
of course as long as i keep working until i am 65-70 i will get more money each month.

that said: you never!!!! risk your retirement on finding a rich person! no way!.

here is what i think: your child needs you and you need to be home when child is home?
get a part time job that gives benefits: supermarkets, banks etc.
ask for hours that will allow you to be home when you need to.
they all offer 401K plans now. maximize that. if they offer 100% of whatever you put in, lets say up to 6% of your salary, then you would take 6% of your salary and put it towards 401k--and they will match the amount--which then doubles for you.

or you can open an IRA and put up to $3000 into it every year. you will be better off during retirement.

i dont know if you have a degree, but you can go to a community college and get one. did you know nurses make $30 an hour?! and you can work part time--they are always needed.

dont wait for someone else to take care of you---you can do it yourself!!! show your child that they too can take care of themselves--just like you did!

you mentioned about working at supermarkets..etc. I understand that's a very good part time job to do while our kids need us and we can work around their school schedule for these types of part time jobs, but anyone of you used to be in the professional field, like lawyer..IT...and had to totally give that up due to our children? how do you feel about putting all that time in school and going to work full time in the professional field and now give all that up? I'm not saying it's not worth the sacrifice, but just needed some input from others whom experience this...thanks!!

also, why isn't marrying a rich person a good idea for retirement planning??

[mlv311]

Originally Posted by slcmo

also, why isn't marrying a rich person a good idea for retirement planning??

1) Because someone who has built wealth and is smart is likely to draw a prenup before the marriage to protect his assets in the case of divorce, particularly if he has children from a previous relationship.
2) Because when you marry for self-interest, you may end up in a relationship that brings more heartache than it's worth.
3) Because you should make it a priority to take care of yourself independently. It would boost your self esteem and give your children a good example.