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I was never "spanked" my Mum would just say go upstairs and come down when we can talk about this and you know that what you did was wrong. It worked every time !!! with my Sons I would just give them as they call it now "the look" that was enough. My Mum had a saying waste of time hitting kids you knock one in and six out. In other words a waste of everybodies time far better to explain.
Ok, lets take this one step further shall we? An officer friend of mine who works for a different agency said that he handled a case in which there appeared to be fresh welts or burns on the childs forehead and appendages. These patterns were small and circular in pattern and it was later discovered that it was a heated pennie or coin placed against the childs body to "draw" out the infection. Is this abuse even though the intentions were nothing but admirable?
Im not giving an opinion one way or the other. I want to know what your opnion is on this type of situation?
coining/coin rubbing
(Also referred to as \"Cao Gio\" - Vietnamese term. \"Cheut Sah\" or \"Quat Sha\" - Chinese term). A form of folk healing commonly practiced among some Asian populations, which involves rubbing the body with a coin or spoon. The coin/spoon is sometimes heated or oiled. The rubbing produces red welts on the skin, superficial echymosis, and non-painful areas with petechiae. These areas should not be mistaken for signs of abuse or signs of a specific disease process. The treatment is applied to the symptomatic area. The belief is that rubbing the coin against the skin draws illness out of the body of the individual and that the red welts will appear only on those individuals who are ill. Coining is done to treat illnesses such as colds, vomiting, headache, pain, heat exhaustion, and seizures. The practice is more common among Vietnamese, Chinese, Hmong, Cambodians, and Laotians.
Perhaps someone 'overheated' the coin, if welts/burns resulted.
I guess I don't have an opinion, one way or the other, this coin rubbing thing just intrigued me though. Apparently, it's not for discipline, and is, instead, considered 'folk medicine'.
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Ok, so would you say that it was abuse because of the "overheating" of the coins? Would you feel under those conditions that it warranted police intervention?
So if this is a cultural practice, should we assume that it is not abuse?
In your opinion, does culture play a major or minor role in how children are disciplined here in San Antonio?
Would it be safe to say that one culture's views of child abuse vary from another? That being the case, should the person doling out the discipline in accordance with thier cultural beliefs be held accountable under Texas law?
My reasons for asking are quite simple. I have seen many times where the primary caregiver used the "Cultural Up-Bringing" as a means of expalining away serious injuries inflicted on the child or children in thier care. So this is why I ask the question.
I agree with those who say a well-placed swat on the butt is not abuse. It's not a form of discipline for every child, however. In my experience. this type of discipline worked with my son, but not my daughter. She would just give me a look that said, "is that all you've got?" Restriction worked better for her. She hated it.
My dad would use a belt on on and it was always "bend over and grab your ankles." My mom, on the other hand, would just grab the chancla off of her foot and smack us on the butt or the backs of the legs.
Haha as a child my and my brother where abused my our step father. But really it did not have an effect on anyone. One day i remember we were riding our bikes on his trailer. We were met with a fish measuring board. Bruises from our knees to our back. That was abuse. My father on the other hand was a slapper. From the face to the butt but he was a good man and I understand why he did what he did.
The Coining, or medicinal healings of some cultures, may be abusive to some, or in some cases neglectful to others, (religions which do not allow medicine/surgery) those, since we are in America, where everyone wants to live, and be, and enjoy the freedoms which we have and allow them to exercise, then we must allow them their eccentricities, but, having been a stepfather, and a father, the reserve to wait for the right tool, a belt, not just the first thing that one can grab, means that it is not just an impulsive act of outrage, which is often the case of abuse and an over-reaction to a very small infraction. "time-outs" Come-on, kids today have more in their rooms then some of us had in our whole life as a child. A computer, Ipod, TV, WII, etc, send them to their room, PUH_LEaze, punish me. One has to be very careful with the extended families of today, a Step-parent, cannot dole out corporal punishment the same as a biological parent, and they shouldnt have to. The biological parent should DEMAND their child respect their choice in a mate. They are the adult, and the child is living in their house, and under their financial roof. (always some exception to that rule, I know, but generally speaking) With that being stated. A switch, leaves welts, and is more damaging, most lawyers will state that it is abusive to use a switch. Also, cant discern the difference between the bruises left by a switch and an electric cord sometimes, so, better to stay away from anything like that. If you have a house, put them to work, yard, cleaning, that type. best way to discipline them.
Spanking on the butt should never be against the law. I believe it is a necessary form of punishment for some children. Of course, there is always a place to draw the line, and if you cross the line then you should be held responsible. A reasonable human being should know where to draw the line just as they do when driving, playing tackle football with their buddies, etc. I am 26 years old, and I was spanked when necessary. It wasn't often, but when it was needed I was laid across my parents bed crying before I ever even got the spanking. My sister on the other hand was the taunter, "That doesn't hurt dad, that doesn't hurt!" She always got more spankings than me It should be the parent's choice in how to discipline their child, and the parents who abuse should be held responsible.
I do think some cultural practices can fall under abuse, including the coin practice if it resulted in burns and welps. Just because its part of a culture, doesn't mean it should be allowed. Its almost as though you would need a guide book to look up specific practices from different cultures to see if they are defined as abuse or not.
This topic has been discussed on several previous threads, but IMO, no one should ever hit a child with any object. We don't spank our daughter at all, but the image of an adult hitting child with a belt or any other object seems unnecessary and abusive. Maybe an open hand on a covered bottom, but anything else is too much.
We had spanking in our house.
We were warned that if we misbehaved this would be the result....kinda like never learning to count to three cuz you never ever wanted them to get past two.
I can honestly say that growing up I only got 1 spanking that I didn't deserve....BUT my past history of story telling on this particular subject is the reason they didn't believe me.
This taught us that there were consequeces to our actions. If we broke the rules we would be punished.
We all grew up to be responsible adults, out of the 4 of us not one was arrested, not one has even been questioned by police.....well a couple traffic tickets.
We all raised our children the same way with the same results.
If spanking is done correctly there is nothing wrong with it
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4 sides is king in TX.
