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I would love to have a 3rd. I have 2 boys. I think I will try...but I am not ready now. We want to be financially stable, and while we are....we just bought a house that needs some work, and I want everything completed, and then have 6 months of savings before I have my third. So I am figuring anywhere between 3-5 more years. i will be 39-41 then.
Yeah, this is why there will be no more babies for me. Realistically, we're in no financial shape for another child, and by the time we will be, I'll be to the point that *I* feel is too old (not judging anyone else on age!!!)... I am 37 and don't want to have another post-40 and know, realistically, that there's no chance between now and then due to finances. I've raised 2 kids while fluctuating in and out of relative poverty due to various circumstances and it's just too hard. I wouldn't change a thing, I adore my kids and my kids have never truly gone without what they needed, but I wouldn't do it now either without a lot more "cushion". I also have concerns about overpopulation..
I do understand the desire though and if it can work for your family, well, then it works for your family and all the best to you!
I have 3. We had originally thought to stop w/two, especially since we were blessed with first a girl, then a boy. But this almost unbearable need was still constant in me, I really really knew to be complete, our family needed one more. So, our bonus baby came to be. She is really the most easy going and personable out of all three, and has been by far the easiest to raise in many ways. Our kids are all 4yrs apart (so its 8yrs between my girls) but they are all so close, its a beautiful thing. I really havent found it more difficult, we always make sure that each child gets personal time w/mom and/or dad, and even the grandparents get into it by taking all three kids for a week each summer, and then each child individually for a long weekend here or there during the year. Our kids all do very different activities, the oldest is in drama, the middle in soccer and the little one is a competitive gymnast. So we're pretty busy, but everyone is happy. Each goes to their siblings games/plays/meets and cheers em on.
Honestly, i can not begin to imagine life w/o any one of them. Each of our kids amazes and delights me to no end and Im thankful to have been blessed with them.
BTW, financially, after the last one, we said, No More or we're not gonna make it on our own. So i got my tubes tied.
Each family has to make the right decision for them. For some, 2 is enough, for that matter, for some, one or even NONE is enough....then we have those w/18.
Best of luck in your decision!!
Tiffany
...But at the same time, we'd be outnumbered with 3 & we've have to buy a new car. We can double up on the rooms since we have 2 boys right now but definitely would need a new car. Probably sounds silly, but those are some of the things we've talked about. ....
Not silly at all. We thought we were pregnant with #3 and that is one of the first things we thought of. That, and possibly needing three bedrooms in a house. We have two boys, so although we would like three bedrooms, we don't need it.
But yes, I can barely handle two, can count on one hand how many nights in the last two years I haven't had to get up at least twice, and still I feel that urge once in awhile to have a third. For awhile, when my youngest was almost one, I had the biggest desire for another child. My husband thought I was nuts!
Our kids were born in the 70's. Our boy was 3, girl was only 13 months when our second biy was born. Although we wanted 3 or 4 he came earlier than I would have chosen but it worked out fine. All 3 got along and were not hard to raise. Financially it was harder when they were teenagers but I was a stay at home mom. Do what you feel is right for your family.
I'm turning 40 this year, and I have a 2.8 yo, and a 14 month old. We'd like to have a third, but we're doing it this random way. We're not going to do anything to stop it, and go this way for about 2 years.
I was also asking myself - Is it hormones that make me to want another child? But now, some years later, I still want a third!!! The sense of incompleteness is still there.
I'm 44 and my kids are 3.5 and 5 years old - a boy and a girl. Granted, I'm just starting to breathe easier, it was a circus there just until recently. Two toddlers - what a treat! - but you don't know it when you are in the midst of it - you don't have time for a big view.
So, I'm actually preparing for the fall conception of a third child (sounds silly, but we were fortunate to get preggo on the first shot both times, so we've been actually trying NOT to get too active in bed). The kids will be 6 and 4.5 when the new baby comes - independent enough, and yet still not too removed for interests to be the same.
I'd love them to have each other when their old folks leave the earth.
If you feel as though the quality of life will not be affected by having a 3rd child, then go ahead.
Out of curiosity, I checked the price of diapers last wk and almost passed out. Now I hear Plastic bottles have some sort of chemical. Baby Food in a jar isn't that great. Due to rising costs, 2 or even 3 incomes is needed which means fewer hrs with the kiddies.
I got 2 sister in laws who were fine with 2 kids. When each had their 3rd child, they were constantly stressed. As for me , I am sticking to one kid. I know I can deal with one kid. Life is too expensive and there is too much going on in this crazy world to bring another innocent life.
Well, there are ways to deal with high costs, and I was a SAHM for a time. I became a SAHM when #3 was an infant. Money was tight, but it was just a season-we have since had two more kids, #5 will be 5yrs tomorrow, and I went back to work a couple years ago. I don't regret a thing! I'm soooo glad we 'went for it'!
The first year, with 3 kids 5 and under, was tough, yes. After that, life got much easier-the older ones become more self-able, able to do self-care like dressing, toileting, ect. Now that the kids are 15-5, life is easier but yes, we are busy as a hive of bees! It's so fun and lively. It is worth the stress of the early years IMO. And the early years aren't all stress-we have wonderful memories from our house full of happy babies.
Again with the money, there are ways to manage expenses. Cloth diapers (although I failed miserably at those and stuck with LUVS), hand-me downs and tag sale clothes (you can get like-new baby/toddler clothes at those, and toys too like Little Tykes stuff), my kids ate mostly table food (you can get a food grinder for ten bucks), and they simply don't need tons of bedroom space until they're older. Three little kids can fit just fine in a bedroom, for some years. You do need a vehicle that can fit the carseats-but some carseats are narrower than others and fit better across a backseat. Used minivans are cheap and get somewhat reasonable mileage.
My opinion is, if you desire it, go for it! I never have known anyone who wanted to give the third one back, LOL.
As for me...I thought I was happy with the standard two kids (one of each) but... surprise! Somehow #3 appeared out of nowhere and is the best thing that ever happened to me. He is the most easy-going and sweet kid, and gives more love out than you'd think possible from such a small person!
And for their sake I'm glad they'll all have each other when they grow up.
hmmm I personally am in between right know - my little ones are 3 and 6 months - I somtimes think I really really secretly want a third, other times the thought scares me to death!! I know my uusband is set with two (for now) so we will see where the future takes us.... we actually had a bit of a surprise with number two - they thought for several weeks we had twins based on the Ultrasound, so we thought three would be our number.... we ended up with a single baby but who knows what will happen down the road..
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Realistically, we're in no financial shape for another child, and by the time we will be, I'll be to the point that *I* feel is too old (not judging anyone else on age!!!)... I am 37 and don't want to have another post-40 and know, realistically, that there's no chance between now and then due to finances. I've raised 2 kids while fluctuating in and out of relative poverty due to various circumstances and it's just too hard. I wouldn't change a thing, I adore my kids and my kids have never truly gone without what they needed, but I wouldn't do it now either without a lot more "cushion". I also have concerns about overpopulation..
and is the best thing that ever happened to me. He is the most easy-going and sweet kid, and gives more love out than you'd think possible from such a small person!
