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He doesn't have a driver's license yet, because his grades weren't that great. He started learning how to drive recently, so I released some money to him that his grandfather (my dad) had been saving for him. He immediately went out and bought a POS car that cost $2,000. He knows he can't drive the car by himself, and yet he has done so - more than once. Because of that, I'm taking him off my insurance policy completely. God help him if he gets into an accident while he's driving alone on only a learner's permit - even if it's not his fault! I've tried talking to him, and he just doesn't get it.
I'm so frustrated. I thought he was more responsible and mature than he is now showing me. I never should have released that money to him; it's obvious that he can't handle it. I'm angry with him, but I'm almost more angry with myself.
He's going back to community college in September (he took a semester off to work, and he was paying me rent for four months), and if he doesn't bring in at least a "C" average, he's out. I'll give him two months to save up enough money to find an apartment, and then I'm done.
I'm so furious with him. I almost hope he does get pulled over, so he'll finally understand. I don't care if he's only driving a couple of blocks or a couple of miles or whatever. How can I condone him breaking the law?
I can relate, I have a 21 year old and have had to push her to pay her insurance on her vehicle and she doesn't, because she knows we will! My concern for you is that since he still lives in your home and is under 21, wouldn't you still be responsible if he did hit someone or was in an accident (even if he isn't on your insurance)? We are in MO and that is what we were told. I am so sorry you are having such a tough time w/him. I hope it gets better for you.
SandyCo, is he going to live with you while in college or in a dorm? Will his license be in effect by then?
You should certainly be concerned with the legal implications of him living as your dependent and being involved in an accident with no insurance and no valid driver's license....but you need to ask an attorney about that. There's a law called respondent superior, where basically the next person up the food chain can be held responsible for another's actions as the "superior" - I don't know if that applies to the head of the household, but I think it does. Him being 20 is a problem - he's legally an adult but living under your roof...mixes it up quite a bit.
Are you planning on paying for his schooling at the community college?
Of course, he thinks that nothing will happen. I told him that he lives in the world of "nothing's going to happen" while I live in the world of "what if something does happen?"
I haven't actually taken him off my policy, but he could be an "excluded driver", though I don't know what happens in that situation if he gets into an accident, etc. I agree that the situation is made unclear because he has legally been an adult for two years, even though he's still a dependent.
He can't register the car without it being insured, of course, but he only bought the car a few days ago and he still has to transfer the title into his name.
I told him I'd pay for his education as long as he keeps a "C" average. Since he's only going to community college, he'll be living at home and commuting ten miles to school.
Thanks again. I have to do some checking on the state laws that apply to this situation.
Ohh! Is there anyway to make a boy wise up before he's 21? If he is still so unresponsible when he turns 21 and is in with the drinking crowd already, I can see no good. I have seen it happen to so many boys (in particular)--they might even be even-keel and then pop! the turn 21 and push everything important aside.
Of course, he thinks that nothing will happen. I told him that he lives in the world of "nothing's going to happen" while I live in the world of "what if something does happen?"
I haven't actually taken him off my policy, but he could be an "excluded driver", though I don't know what happens in that situation if he gets into an accident, etc. I agree that the situation is made unclear because he has legally been an adult for two years, even though he's still a dependent.
He can't register the car without it being insured, of course, but he only bought the car a few days ago and he still has to transfer the title into his name.
I told him I'd pay for his education as long as he keeps a "C" average. Since he's only going to community college, he'll be living at home and commuting ten miles to school.
Thanks again. I have to do some checking on the state laws that apply to this situation.
If I remember right you are responsible as long as he is below 21 and living with you. Even if there's some doubt legally you KNOW (living in CA) that you're next on the food chain and WILL get sued and knowing wacko CA courts like I do you may lose.
Careful and good luck...
Can he go ahead and take his driver's license test?
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