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Location: In my own little corner... sittin' in Jax FL
589 posts, read 1,635,303 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by therewego
Frankly, I would only let them do that as a "treat" that they have earned all week for eating dinner peacefully at the table.
LOL we are so similar! It's skeeeery
Anyway, to the OP... IMO you need to be consistent. Yes, it's rough right now but stick to your guns. If it is important to you that your family sit down to eat together, enforce it. However, you will have some resistance for a while. Once they really get into the routine it isn't so bad. Oh and even then there are the inevitable rough spots.
As for picky eaters, in my house, they are hungry then and learn to eat what's given to them. They won't starve. Another 'trick' is only water at the table. If you allow them something else to drink, keep it to about 4 oz and then the next fill-up is water.
Just my 2-cents. Best of luck! I have 3 girls and it's so.much.fun. LOL
Anyway, to the OP... IMO you need to be consistent. Yes, it's rough right now but stick to your guns. If it is important to you that your family sit down to eat together, enforce it. However, you will have some resistance for a while. Once they really get into the routine it isn't so bad. Oh and even then there are the inevitable rough spots.
As for picky eaters, in my house, they are hungry then and learn to eat what's given to them. They won't starve. Another 'trick' is only water at the table. If you allow them something else to drink, keep it to about 4 oz and then the next fill-up is water.
Just my 2-cents. Best of luck! I have 3 girls and it's so.much.fun. LOL
We are very similar, ha ha! Tried to rep, but can't...
In my previous post, I did not address the pickiness, forgot...I agree with Sum1Else that you have to stick it out, they will not starve, and I like the water rule. Our rule is they have to have at least 1/2 of the meal before drinking any juice (which is watered). As for the food, they have to "try" whatever I put down for dinner because if they do not try it they will not know if they like it. I also tell them that I have eaten plenty of chicken nuggets for them so now they have to try my food.
You mean to tell me your children were not born with the "How to be a parent Manual?!" ha ha. My mom use to tell me I didn't come with directions. I found out what she ment after I had my son. We do the family dinner at the table. My son (3) is not a big eater. Infact it is more like a few bites here and a few there till he says he is full. I would like him to eat more but I will not force him to eat beyond content. I do the diluted juice after dinner. Otherwise I think he would perfer a liquid diet I think the key word I read was GRADUAL. i think that is a perfect idea. It is a process of elimination. What works for one family may not work for another but it is worth th try to find out. I read some very good ideas in the past posts. Don't throw the towel in just yet be consistent with whatever you decide to do. Happy parenting to all!!
So my question is this,,,would you let your 2 year old and your 4 year old eat their dinner in front of the TV for some peace of mind? Plus they seem to eat better too...OR would you force the 'eat at the table' rule and just have a really bad dinner time with no-body eating much of anything??
Nope, b/c they will then know they got the better of you & that somehow, someway, they control the dinner situation.
Sure would force them--they are 4 & 2 and are trying to control the situation. Sorry, but that's a no-go. Come up with a consequence that works for your dd's and also a positive reinforcement that works for your dd's. If they want to be little stinkers: consequence. If they decide to do the right thing: positive reinforcement. Consistency is the key. And to be consistent every night when you are tired or worn out & just don't feel like hearing them whine..that's when you really need to just dig deep and stick to your guns. Your dd's will appreciate the consistency.
Meal time in my family growing up was very special. For my dh it was not & he grew up watching tv bfast, lunch & dinner. He says he turned out fine...I beg to differ
I think you just need to figure out what battles are worth fighting & what ones are not. If dinnertime is something you want to instill in your dd's as family time, do what you need to. They will catch on.
Well yeahhhh...my son eats better also, sitting in front of the TV, but thats NOT the house rule. Mealtime is at the TABLE. Not in the living room on the coffee table, or elsewhere.
It may be more aggrevasion (sp?) on the parents part by getting them to eat, headache, etc... but I say,"Too bad!" Set the rules, set the boundaries. Its just another way for kids to get by with it. Deal with it.
I had a similar problem in my house. DD (now 23) refused to eat breakfast. Mom was TERRIFIED that she would go to school hungry so ANYTHING was better than nothing. Candy and soda became an acceptable breakfast. It was not until the teacher mentioned that DD came to school with Kool-Aid around her mouth that mom was embarrassed into changing breakfast foods.
Location: In my own little corner... sittin' in Jax FL
589 posts, read 1,635,303 times
Reputation: 331
Oh I thought of something else...
Remember that positive reinforcement / experiences work wonders. There were lots of those in here already.
BUT... my girls are busy and want to get back to whatever they were doing. They must ask and then wait to be excused from the table. My now 4.5 yo has been doing that since 3. Also, gearing up to dinner... have them help with putting napkins on the table, or setting silverware etc. Just like bedtime, you have a routine. Sometimes I think that kids can have a little trouble switching gears and perhaps it might help.
And for mom... This is the hardest thing... be calm. Yes, I raise my voice and yell too sometimes but I find that if I can keep my 'cool' it helps. Remember your breathing exercises from labor? Yeah they work in these situations, too.
And (call me a bad mommy or not!) if one child has eaten her whole meal, I'm likely to give her her dessert in front of the non-eater.
Me too!
Nothing is a better motivator for my son to eat his dinner than knowing his little sister will get a bowl of ice cream (and choice of toppings - I am a sucker for sprinkles) and he won't!
Okay, I was making breakfast and thought of other things I did to "interest" them in dinner time:
1) Have them "help" you prep dinner; I did this with spaghetti. They stand on a stool at the island. Instead of keeping the spaghetti long, I cut it in 1/3's so they helped with that. They put it in the pan. They each added a cup of water. One added butter, the other added chicken bouillion. I put on the stove. I totally credited them with making the spaghetti and they loved it. I also made broccoli and put it on the plate, EEK, but each tried it and one liked it but the other I still keep having her try it.
2) Now with DVR, I let them keep the show on but we have taught them to pause it so they will still be able to watch it after we eat. I did this because I "observed" them eating while watching and more watching happened than eating; food got cold and they did not like it after a while.
I think you got a lot of good ideas here and hope some of these help. It is very trying but you cannot give in or it will set the stage for future problems. I still know some 8/9 year olds that will only eat chicken nuggets and fries, ugh. I don't think you want that to be your kids in the future.
I really dont see the big deal other than messes.
I loved to watch TV and have dinner.
Thank god dad won the fight on that one.
We would just sit in the TV room half paying attention to the TV and talking too.
Personally I would choose to focus on things that matter hard and fast like the quality of the type of food rather than where its eaten.
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Another 'trick' is only water at the table. If you allow them something else to drink, keep it to about 4 oz and then the next fill-up is water. 
