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That's not true. We did it with our child. We explained bedtime would go to 10pm if there was a nap, and 10pm was not OK with us. They had no problem agreeing to skip the nap, and just gave "quiet time" instead. In fact, there were several kids in the same boat. A good daycare understands not all kids can/should have naps at that age and can accommodate.
If your daycare doesn't allow it, I'd look for a new daycare. They should be well enough staffed that they can handle it.
If you can find a place that will accommodate this, then go ahead and do it. I was just stating that in a big place (not sure where the OP has her child) they really can't do this for a few kids...they at least have to stay on their mats/beds because daycare centers are notoriously under staffed. (as well as underpaid).
If you can find a place that will accommodate this, then go ahead and do it. I was just stating that in a big place (not sure where the OP has her child) they really can't do this for a few kids...they at least have to stay on their mats/beds because daycare centers are notoriously under staffed. (as well as underpaid).
It's not always that they are understaffed, it is also that most places don't have a bunch of different rooms and it is just impractical to expect that the kids who do need to nap are going to be able to while there are other kids being active. In order to run well, they need to have structure and rules and they need to apply to everyone or it just doesn't work....
I've worked in daycare and I have a Masters in Teaching with several years of teaching early childhood education.
First off, they cannot cut out the nap time at daycare. This is regulated basically because the kids need downtime (often the teachers have lunch at nap time and or use it for break time.). You may only have 2 teachers watching the kids while the rest have their lunch or break. Even if the child is in home daycare with one lady, she needs her break. Is she not entitled to go to the bathroom or eat a meal?
Okay, well, what sort of family time/routine do you have with your child? Are you and his dad rushed for time due to schedules? Is he hard to get to bed on weekends (if things are more relaxed??).
I am afraid bedtime problems are a part of many 3 year old's lives...
I would hope that the needs of the children would supersede the needs of the teachers to have a break... after all, especially in a center, there should be enough teachers to rotate. In a private home, the provider should only take the number of children that she can handle without counting on an extended break. I know that as a mother, I don't get to punch out mid-day... that's par for the course in that sort of profession!
I would think the kids who weren't napping would still have a quiet time...maybe some books or be allowed to listen to music on headphones, not running around in another room playing. That's what we did even at home...you don't have to sleep but you have to have a quiet time on your bed so mommy doesn't pull all her hair out before bedtime. I did build that 'mommy break time' into the routine. 80% of the time the kids fell asleep anyway but they still took naps at 4-5 yo sometimes and went to bed just fine too. My kids are natural born sleepers. LOL
I would hope that the needs of the children would supersede the needs of the teachers to have a break... after all, especially in a center, there should be enough teachers to rotate. In a private home, the provider should only take the number of children that she can handle without counting on an extended break. I know that as a mother, I don't get to punch out mid-day... that's par for the course in that sort of profession!
Of course you don't but if you were employed in a job somewhere, you would. A daycare provider is not a mother. They are working folks and the law mandates they be able to take breaks and eat etc.
Daycare centers obviously cannot "force" a child to sleep but they do have quiet time for the older kids. They have to stay put, the lights are low/off and quiet music is playing. An older child may quietly look at books or something ...this most likely won't solve the OP's problem.
Try having organic only dinners. Any sugar at all can make some kids act like this. Preservatives and dyes will as well. The dinner only may be the only organic tweak you need and its good for the whole family.
But if you want to list the foods he eats on a regular basis I can highlight the ones that cause reactions in children if you don't have the time.
For the the kid's bedroom make sure its cooler and has a red tone night light. Blue tones dont let you rest as you should.
Make it fun and get him a sound machine he can listen to as he falls asleep.
I have worked in daycare and they usually need to have all kids lay down. I have worked with that age group as well. If you haven't worked in daycare it may seem simple to let everyone do something different and it isn't. You might want to find a home day care. You can talk to the daycare and perhaps they would cut his nap down in time. THey might allow him to read or something. The issue is all kids lay down and some need a nap. If they get that some kids don't have to sleep then nobody will want to. I worked in Kindergarden when they had all day and they would have a rest time. It was the rule that everyone lay down and if you don't want to sleep then you need to at least be quiet. The issue is those that really didn't need to sleep never fell asleep and if I read it right this child falls to sleep. I would talk to the daycare and see what you can work out. Although I will say this. I have worked in Daycare for infants as well. I can't tell you how many parents of one year to two would say to me Why does my child sleep here and not at home. The parents would come in and look like a car ran over them yet we had no problems. THe same thing would happen to kids who had pacifers. They couldn't walk around with them in their mouths. So the Mom would say as they came in with it in their mouth or hands that they won't give it up. Guess what I just explained that we had to put it in the cubby and they handed it over and nap time they got it back and then put it back again. THen when MOm picked them up and she took their things to go home guess what the pacifer would go back in their mouths before they got to the door. It is all about routine and staying with that. I'm not sure why this child isn't sleeping but I think he is seeing if he really has to at home.
...I have worked in daycare and they usually need to have all kids lay down...If you haven't worked in daycare it may seem simple to let everyone do something different and it isn't...
...because if you let one kid do something different....they will ALL want to do something different.
Of course you don't but if you were employed in a job somewhere, you would. A daycare provider is not a mother. They are working folks and the law mandates they be able to take breaks and eat etc.
Daycare centers obviously cannot "force" a child to sleep but they do have quiet time for the older kids. They have to stay put, the lights are low/off and quiet music is playing. An older child may quietly look at books or something ...this most likely won't solve the OP's problem.
When I had my son in daycare, I know I WANTED the caregivers to take a break. There were 3 of them and 18 children under the age of 3. Most SAHMs don't have 18 children or even 6 or 7...
My son was under 12 months when he was at daycare & quiet time was in place even at that age...light low, music, no running around/playing...daycare providers are not the parents & can't be expected to run things the way things are run at home. If a parent is expecting that & not getting it...either find another daycare, go with a nanny or figure out a way to stay at home...
Sorry, but sounds like the OP needs to run the home instead of the child. The boy is telling his mom how things work in that home & if he is this way at 3...well, it's not going to magically get better unless some consistent & firm discipline & procedures are set in stone for bedtime...
I'm not the perfect parent & make plenty of mistakes every day (like having my kids nap today at 4:30pm...), but if there is one thing I have down to a science, it's naps & bedtime. I can honestly say it is the one thing, next to mealtime, that runs very smoothly with minor bumps (colds, overtiredness, moodiness). I've been firm, consistent, yet have made it pleasant (bath time, reading books, singing a song). My son wanted to play the same game when he was 2. Nope. Wasn't going to happen. If #2 son decides he wants to pull "I don't sleep until I want to" act, I know one or two things that work with him & they will be used.
My sons know what to expect & what is expected of them. It's a continual work in progress, but I believe it's been the way it has due to consistency & discipline.
The OP can get some sleep. She/he knows what to do. It's a matter of doing it & doing it consistently & firmly. The OP has done TOO many things. Now, the child is like "Ok, what's next?" I guarantee one of the listed things would have worked had the OP stuck with it & let the child know that he/she meant business.
I would hope that the needs of the children would supersede the needs of the teachers to have a break... after all, especially in a center, there should be enough teachers to rotate. In a private home, the provider should only take the number of children that she can handle without counting on an extended break. I know that as a mother, I don't get to punch out mid-day... that's par for the course in that sort of profession!
I'm sorry to disagree but when I worked in daycare I would EXPECT to have a half an hour break after working an 8 hour day. I don't know how people who work with kids are thought of as 'not needing a break.' A CEO gets a break, your mail carrier gets a break, the clerk at the supermarket gets one...shouldn't people who work with precious children get one?
Being a preschool teacher is not a charity. It's not for the stupid. I have a Master's Degree. We did not 'play all day.' We also were VERY VERY poorly paid but a person is not a daycare/preschool teacher to become rich..
Somehow you seem to imply a teacher/daycare worker SHOULD be available 8/10 hours to entertain the kids...I don't think a mother even does that...( I don't for my son.)
In addition, a mother has one, two, three kids of DIFFERENT ages unless she's "Kate from John and Kate." Have you ever been in a room for 8 hours with 15-20 3 year olds for more than a few minutes???
And, not to turn this into a debate, many daycares employ BARE minimal staff--they DO NOT have people to cover breaks and lunches without putting maybe one adult or two to watch 30 or so kids...(I worked at 3 different preschools and if someone was out sick, there WAS NO SUB). You made due with less staff...
So, no, having little Suzie sit and 'color quietly,' while Little Raphie is drawing and Little Brittany reads her book is NOT fair when you have a bunch of other kids who HAVE to nap (or stay quietly on the mats) so your teachers can have a sandwich in quiet.
I just want to present 'the other side' of working with kids to show you people who never worked with children that daycare/preschool teachers DO need their time outs...(otherwise they will be very cranky with the kids by the end of the day.)
Working with little kids is quite stressful.
Last edited by GypsySoul22; 02-09-2009 at 03:58 PM..
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80% of the time the kids fell asleep anyway but they still took naps at 4-5 yo sometimes and went to bed just fine too. My kids are natural born sleepers. LOL
