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I am "the ex wife" to my ex husband.. HE left US and moved in with his GF three states away. THEN he expected me to bring our children to him???? Ummmm no.
He tried the thing with "send them with EVERYTHING they might need" too. I can see clothes especially since he doesn't see them often enough to keep clothes they can fit at his house (by his choice). He chewed ME out because our oldest started her period THE FIRST TIME at his house and he had to go buy her pads. OMG!!!!!! Like I can guess that one.
His GF has had 2 of his children (BTW she is still married to the father of her two older children) and is currently pregnant with ANOTHER one for him. Well they are boys..that is what he wanted anyway. When OUR youngest was born and came out a girl he sat on the back porch of our house and CRIED because HE didn't have a boy... WAAAAAAA.
I was married to him for 13 years. 4788 days. Two children. 25 job changes. Three different places to live (two of which my father paid the rent for to keep us from being on the street). He drove a truck and was gone almost 100% of our marriage. He had a serious video poker habit ($20 at a shot) and had steaks, ribs, ect at the truck stop while I did all I could to budget the money so I could have milk for the kids.
I can assure you, I earned every dang penny of child support my daughters are entitled to. If he chooses NOT to pay it (which mostly he does pay) then he WILL loose his CDL because the State of Oklahoma will suspend it. He has tried to talk me into taking it from the state, but I know how he pays his bills too.
It don't matter how much her new husband/bf makes, the FATHER of that child is obligated to support her. In Oklahoma there are set standards and there is an online calculator for most states. Google and see what you can find.
I am still wondering how the woman has kept the child away for six years yet "never sends her with clothes, toothbrush & toothpaste" and why on God's green earth would you expect your husband's daughter to arrive with toothpaste.
She is not coming to a hotel, she's coming to her daddy's house.
Does she need a sleeping bag and pillow, too?
No kidding. Very heartless which makes me wonder if the OP really needs the money or is just trying to get what she can. OP: You need to feel more kindly toward a child who was left behind no matter which parent may have been more at fault. This child sees that she was left while her daddy got a new family which in her eyes he seems to value more -- simply because he lives with them and not with her.
If you are talking about retirement funds, you most certainly are entitled to half of it if it was saved during the marriage.
That is money that was saved for retirement that would have been going into the family budget, to pay off the mortgage, bills, buy things, go on vacations, etc.
No, 10% is ridiculous.
I don't know how he thinks you are not entitled to half and good for you for not being convinced you are.
He has an attorney, I cannot afford one. I think he thinks I am stupid enough to settle for less. His attorney is dumb enough to not tell him I will get half. I think she wants it to go all the way to court since she will make more money.
I understand where everyone is coming from and I am not trying to be a b**** about the situation. She has kept his daughter away from him for almost six years would call and ask him to sign over his rights to the man that she is with now and when he asked to see her she would hang up the phone. He has never stopped paying child support and she always had medical and dental. There is more to this story and I could write a book on it. She has clothes and everything at my house, but when a child tells you that her mother never buys her anything or take her shopping what would you think. Where is that money going? She has not worked since 2005 and she has someone she is living with and in one county she says that they are married and in another county he is her boyfriend. I am just a little upset that in the papers that we got in the mail it said that they did not take our hardships in to consideration. I do not mind working, I was in the military for nine and a half years, but I got medically discharged and believe if I was able to stay in I would still be there and not employed. Yeah I did feel that when she sent her for the first visit she should of atleast had enough clothes to last throughout the visit and year I am the wife now and our kids are a year apart. So what I will never mistreat the daughter and she will always have things at my house.
I understand where everyone is coming from and I am not trying to be a b**** about the situation. She has kept his daughter away from him for almost six years would call and ask him to sign over his rights to the man that she is with now and when he asked to see her she would hang up the phone. He has never stopped paying child support and she always had medical and dental. There is more to this story and I could write a book on it. She has clothes and everything at my house, but when a child tells you that her mother never buys her anything or take her shopping what would you think. Where is that money going? She has not worked since 2005 and she has someone she is living with and in one county she says that they are married and in another county he is her boyfriend. I am just a little upset that in the papers that we got in the mail it said that they did not take our hardships in to consideration. I do not mind working, I was in the military for nine and a half years, but I got medically discharged and believe if I was able to stay in I would still be there and not employed. Yeah I did feel that when she sent her for the first visit she should of atleast had enough clothes to last throughout the visit and year I am the wife now and our kids are a year apart. So what I will never mistreat the daughter and she will always have things at my house.
The money could be going to pay the BILLS. She still needs electric and water and a place to live... and part of the child support is supposed to go to that. He should have taken her back to court and ask them to enforce the custody agreement. Hold her in contempt of court for not following the custody decree. It is a legal document..you can do that if she isn't holding up her part of the order. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. Every missed visit on either side. Everytime she comes to your house take her picture and keep it dated for proof how she looks. After awhile you will have plenty of evidence and then you can ask for custody. Then you won't have to pay child support.
The way my lawyer explained it to me was in a household like MINE where I have a husband that is not my children's father the judge can consider them either 1/2 of the total or 1/3 depending on how they figure it. If it is 1/2 then they are figuring I have support from my current husband and they have support from their father. So basically depending on how it is figured, the child support should pay 1/2 or 1/3 of the household bills. That was the time when their father decided he had them part of the summer that he shouldn't have to pay support that month. So wanted to just cut that month out. The judge told him he couldn't do that because the household had to be maintained in their absence. When they come back they have to still have electric and water and a bedroom. It can't just stop because they are gone for a month. We did negotiate and took the total for the 12 months and deducted 1 month from it and spread it over the other 12...so I still got 1 less.... but not 1 whole at a time, if that makes any sense.
Since when does the woman after a divorce not have to work? It is not the Ex-husband's fault she had more kids. All her money is probably child support and welfare. I would fight for custody if she can't even keep the child in clean clothes.
Why are the ex-husbands always the bad guys on these forums?
Your husband needs to go back to court about this recent request for more child support. Find an attorney who isn't expensive but has a great reputation; they are out there, and with the attorney work out a statement of what your expenses are, what your income is, stuff like that. It appears your husbands ex is greedy and if what you say about her keeping this child from her dad for six years is true she could be in violation of court orders for visitation. Why didn't your husband fight harder of the six year time frame to get to see his child? I don't understand.
In all this mess, please be sure that this child who has become the "target" and cause of all this mess isn't feeling that she is to blame for all the mass confusion. Sometimes when ex couples are arguing over child support, visitation, etc. the child will think it is their fault...please someone in all this fiasco pay attention to that too.
I'm a 2nd wife that had to watch some of this nonsense go on too so I'm gonna cut the OP some slack.
My husband's ex played this game with us too. She tried every way possible to raise the child support and squeeze every penny out of us she could.
She at one point tried to get the judge to take MY salary into consideration. So we said..sure...as long as they had to take HER husband's into consideration too. (I can negotiate when need be ) He was a judge! and made three times what I made. She backed away from that one.
I never ever begrudged the child support..what I did begrudge was the child support, plus all medical, all dental, all babysitters, 95% of the school clothing while we had him most of the time.
On the rare occations that she did keep him, she would send him to us with one set of clothes (he left our house with more) one shoe, blah blah bah.
We got to the point that we kept extra clothes here but changed him into the clothes she sent him in (clean of course) when it was time to go. We just couldn't afford to keep replacing these clothes.
Sadly in cases like these the 2nd wife has to bite her lip and isn't allowed to say much of anything. Even when SHE had nothing to do with the divorce.
So about all you can do, is make a nest for this poor child in your home. Make sure she has a space of her own with all the essentials that she needs.
Since when does the woman after a divorce not have to work? It is not the Ex-husband's fault she had more kids. All her money is probably child support and welfare. I would fight for custody if she can't even keep the child in clean clothes.
Why are the ex-husbands always the bad guys on these forums?
Thank you at least somebody is thinking the way I am thinking
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HE left US and moved in with his GF three states away. THEN he expected me to bring our children to him???? Ummmm no. 
His attorney is dumb enough to not tell him I will get half. I think she wants it to go all the way to court since she will make more money.
Mom wants more child support
) He was a judge! and made three times what I made. She backed away from that one.
