Parents and siblings' responsibilities when 18+? (children, college, adults, problem)

[qjane82]

For the parents here, when your children turn 18 what are some instances where you tell your children that they're grownups now and they need to take care of the problem themselves- sink or swim? To what extent do you expect the older sibling to be there for their now adult younger siblings? Or how do you try to be there for your child but at the same time try to let them grow to be self-reliant adults?

I realize these are broad questions, but I wanted to see what everyone thinks nonetheless.

[maciesmom]

I have an 18 y.o. daughter....I don't think it's a matter of "OK, now you're 18, I'm done!" - it's more gradual than that and I would think it should have started awhile back. My DD is in college -we are both helping pay for it but I'm still the one that actually gets that stuff done. For the last year or 2 she has made most of her own dr. and dentist appts and is responsible for getting herself there. She has done her own laundry for several years also. If she has a problem she might ask me for my opinion but ultimately, how she resolves it is her choice.

ETA - as far as older siblings responsibility toward younger sibs...I wouldn't think it should be too much of an issue at this point. DD will be home Friday, DS has a lacrosse banquet on Tuesday, I did include her in our reservation and I have no reason to believe she wouldn't want to come. She was able to get some concert tickets earlier this year for a concert this summer she knew he would like to attend also so she got him a ticket. I wouldn't see it being an issue unless they just weren't close to begin with or the age difference is too much....