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Oh my , It was only last week, same thread with one exception, it was your parents that were cold unloving, there seems to be a theme here to all your threads. Honestly, why would you continue to insult everyones intelligence. A good hobby works wonders, give it a go.
My father has never been one to say things like "I love you" very often, plus while I was growing up he was away on business for weeks at a time a lot, so it's not something I heard from him a lot. But he'd always try to make it clear that he loved my siblings and I and would always encourage us and would gladly help us with things like school work or learning a new trade (skiing, golf, card games, computer games, odd jobs around the house, how to use every tool in his tool box properly, ect). Plus, every now and then he'd get very drunk and tell us repeatedly (broken-record like) how much he loved us all.
So I don't think that ever effected me negatively and I think our awkwardness towards each other is completely unrelated.
My mother on the other hand tells me now and then that she loves me, and always has, and then she'll go in for a big hug and all that stuff. Growing up though she never really expressed it well, was always a little cold and distant. Especially as a teenager, but sometimes when I was a kid too, I'd often wonder if she really meant it when she said she loved me.
I think my mother's slight coldness and distance has effected me negatively, even though she always said told us she loves us.
I feel so sorry for you. It must be tough to live like that. So very tough.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Weekend Traveler
More stories from my crazy extended family. My Aunt and Uncle are cold people who have six kids. None of the kids have had any luck in the world of love. Or do they have any friends. Why? Their parents did not say they loved them. Cause and effect?
I tried very hard to remember the last time my parents said I love you to me or my sibling but can't.. But I can easliy think of a million little ways they should us love I guess some people it hard to show that emotion... I must say that I do tell my kids a hundrend times a day I love them - Maybe i did develop a complex and never noticed it... LOL - Seriously Me and my siblilng are well adjusted fun loving people who are either married with children or in a serious relationship... I think it more of the whole picture than three words.
Like the OP, my mother said 'I love you' only once. It was on her death bed, and I said it first. I think it does damage the child and then adult when a parent never says that. But, I had to get out of my pity party and suck it up, because I can't change the way things were.
But, I make sure that I tell my daughter that I love her every day, some times several times a day. I don't want her to ever feel that emptiness that I felt growing up.
My parents always told each other I love you, and told all 18 of their
Kids they loved us, today my parents are in their 80 and when I get
Off the phone with either of them we always say I love you.
Even with all the love that we have shared in our home we still have a
Few kids that have gone down the wrong road, I think it’s a choice you
Make when you’re growing up to do the right thing or mess up your life.
Like the OP, my mother said 'I love you' only once. It was on her death bed, and I said it first. I think it does damage the child and then adult when a parent never says that. But, I had to get out of my pity party and suck it up, because I can't change the way things were.
But, I make sure that I tell my daughter that I love her every day, some times several times a day. I don't want her to ever feel that emptiness that I felt growing up.
More stories from my crazy extended family. My Aunt and Uncle are cold people who have six kids. None of the kids have had any luck in the world of love. Or do they have any friends. Why? Their parents did not say they loved them. Cause and effect?
I don't think it's as simple as that. Not really. My parents never told any of us kids that they loved us, but both my sisters are happily married with families. I'm the odd man out.
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