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When I was 14, my curfew was about 10-11pm, mainly because we had to walk everywhere.
I remember in the summers that we would walk to mcdonalds, the movie theatre or to the bowling alley and we would stay there till about 9:45ish and then all walk back or catch a ride with someone parents.
My brother now doesn't have a curfew and he is 14 mainly because my mom picks him up and drops him off and etc. She doesn't really let him walk around like I did, which is weird because I am the girl and usually parents are more strict on the girl and his friends parents don't let them do that much either.
She also doesn't let him hang out with girls in groups like that when he does out. The most he can do is go to the skatepark with a few friends but she does drive by snoopings or will camp out there with him following him around and talking to him all the time :/
But back to the girl thing....when I was with my groups of friends there was always like 3-4 guys in the group...go figure..
But yeah I would make it about 10 or 11 if they are having to walk. The city curfew here is 12am for anyone under 18 so..
Oh and I would let the RESPONSIBLE son earn extra time out...because if he acts good he deserves a reward and not to be held at the same standards as the trouble maker.
At 14 they aren't little kids anymore and do not want to be treated as such. It is a difficult age. Why not make a contract with them (as mentioned above) but let them feel like partners. Ask them when its the appropriate time to get home and reach an agreement that works for them as well.
If they suggest a very late time, ask them to explain why and to be specific about that. You need to have an open dialog. As for your stepson, he may have issues, why not let his father talk to him and see what bothers him. The worst you can do is make him feel being the bad boy next to your boy (the good son).
too broad a question for people we really don't know anything about. Its really dependant on the people involved and whats going on in your household.
9-10pm seems a reasonable time period to be indoors. My mom wanted us inside somewhere by sunset. You didn't need a clock for that and it was obvious and no mistaking it. Being physically home by 10pm.
Bad side of this is that teens get crafty. I was. I'd wait till by parents fell asleep and when I felt the coast was clear, would go back out another hour or two and come back. No one was ever the wiser. Not condoning it, just telling ya to be aware of things like that.
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