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But give me one good reason they shouldn't be having sex.
If you want to start a thread about whether or not teenage boys should be having sex with one another while lying to their parents, please do.
Don't expect me to waste my time in such a thread.
As to how to "tie it all together", I used the analogy to explain why the "well, they're going to do it anyways" argument is indicative of poor parenting skills, whether the child is a 17 year old or a 3 year old.
Here it is in plain english: Just because you suspect a child is going to do something regardless of the consequences, is a STUPID excuse for giving them the opportunity and tools to do so.
I've never known parent who did let their girlfriend stay the night. Not at 17. As a compromise, maybe she can invite them to stay at her house if she has reservations. Sounds like a reasonable alternative.
But give me one good reason they shouldn't be having sex.
Here it is in plain english: Just because you suspect a child is going to do something regardless of the consequences, is a STUPID excuse for giving them the opportunity and tools to do so.
BINGO!!!
Unfortunately its the new way of parenting and one reason why our country is going down the crapper. Just think...these kids will be our senators and congressmen one day.
If you want to start a thread about whether or not teenage boys should be having sex with one another while lying to their parents, please do.
They shouldn't have to lie to their parents. The parents ought to get their heads out of their posteriors and into the real world, and figure out that there is nothing wrong with two healthy 17-year-olds having sex. (Especially if they are the same sex, for obvious reasons.)
Quote:
As to how to "tie it all together", I used the analogy to explain why the "well, they're going to do it anyways" argument is indicative of poor parenting skills, whether the child is a 17 year old or a 3 year old.
You're right, it's poor reasoning. There just isn't any good reason to be opposed to two healthy, consenting 17-year-olds having sex, so the argument is moot anyway, whether it is good or bad.
Do you know what "promiscuous" means? I'll help you:
Main Entry: pro·mis·cu·ous
Pronunciation: \prə-ˈmis-kyə-wəs\
Function: adjective
Etymology: Latin promiscuus, from pro- forth + miscēre to mix — more at pro-, mix
Date: 1601
1 : composed of all sorts of persons or things
2 : not restricted to one class, sort, or person : indiscriminate <education…cheapened through the promiscuous distribution of diplomas — Norman Cousins>
3 : not restricted to one sexual partner
4 : casual, irregular <promiscuous eating habits>
Having a steady boyfriend or girlfriend does not even begin to qualify.
Precisely my point if you had bothered to read my post completely. I said that a sexual relationship, especially for a young person, is preferable within a steady relationship and not just as casual sex. The OP did not think that the boy in question was in any permanent relationship.
Now I have noticed that in many of your posts you mention that there is nothing wrong if 2 consenting 17 years old engage in sex. That may be your opinion and you are entitled to it but if the OP started the thread means that perhaps he/she is not so comfortable with that view and by reading the whole thread you will notice that many other people share such discomfort. Sex is a wonderful thing when it is lived responsibly.
Just having sex for the sake of experimenting or getting a quick relief to our basic instincts is not the best way to develop as human beings and we, as adults, need to help our children discover that, that there is much more to it and that our bodies and emotions are interconected and if we mis-use and mistread our bodies in the end the whole person will suffer.
I wouldnt let my kid sleep there... its exactly the same situation if your son was straight and said one of my female friends wants me to sleep over... Please I get trusting your kid but come on now "just friends" I know they are going to do what they want at the end of the day but as a parent allowing the sleepover is the same as saying let me fluff your pillows so you guys could have intercourse.
Unfortunately its the new way of parenting and one reason why our country is going down the crapper. Just think...these kids will be our senators and congressmen one day.
I agree some parents are too much into "let them be independent and make thier decisions he's 16 he knows whats best for him".... Parenting does not stop when the teenage hormones kicks in.... You have to be more of a parent then!
Unfortunately its the new way of parenting and one reason why our country is going down the crapper. Just think...these kids will be our senators and congressmen one day.
Oh right. Because our politicians today are soooo upstanding and pure. Puhleeze. Try Googling "political sex scandals" and see how many pop up.
So, that old sky-is-falling excuse you've brought up is just old, tired, and busted. And cheating on its wife, like a good proportion of our senators and congressmen right now.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by djacques
Of course you should. At his age it's stupid for him not to have a boyfriend. (And yes, I would have the same opinion about a straight kid and his girlfriend, although there would obviously need to be the additional emphasis on effective contraception.)
Yes. Pregnancy is bad at that age.
(I know what you're getting at, it just came across as hilarious)
Anyhow, no way I would let a boy stay the night at a girl's house even if they were just friends. I fail to see how this is any different except that there isn't going to be any estrogen involved to mitigate the testosterone.
He's going to do what he's going to do, but he needs to know what is Ach Ja and what is nicht, nicht with his parents. You can't make it okay to do things that are against your rules simply because you have no control. That would be enabling, not parenting. Remember, a 17 year old looks very adultish but he is not.
Last edited by jimboburnsy; 07-21-2009 at 10:49 AM..
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