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My daughter is 5 yrs, was born at 31 weeks, and is developmentally delayed - speech wise, and I would say she is catching up fast, but mentally, is probably at that 3.5 - 4 yr stage. She started KG this year. When school started, we had met with her teacher and had explained to her about her, she is a smart child, and is catching up fast, but still is definitely not where an average 5 yr kindergartner is at.
It is now a month since she is going to school ( year round), and almost daily I am getting notes from the teacher about how she is not listening, following instructions, the TA complains to my son ( 2 yrs older) about how she did not listen to her today OR was not paying attention. The Friday folder has work that is sent with notes on how she is not doing this, would not understand the instructions...
Second time this week, a "sad gram" has been sent home for our signature - for taking a ball from another child and throwing it away/ and about her not keeping quiet in line.
While I realize this is a public school, and the teacher has 19 other kids to deal with, I am completely convinced the right approach is being taken in dealing with my child. I have requested a parent-teacher conference. My question is - how should I go about dealing with this? What should be my approach? I am aware, depending on how things go, we should probably have her repeat a year in KG. This will help her. But I also want the teacher/school to be open to dealing with a child who is developmentally behind, but who is catching up quickly. Any suggestions, anyone? What would you do if you were in my place?
I think it sounds like your child is not ready for structured school. She may need more time just being a carefree little kid , at home, with her mother. It sounds like she is frustrated, unhappy and not wanting to participate. Is there any way to pull her out and keep her home for another year?
I think it sounds like your child is not ready for structured school. She may need more time just being a carefree little kid , at home, with her mother. It sounds like she is frustrated, unhappy and not wanting to participate. Is there any way to pull her out and keep her home for another year?
I had thought of that, but then she went to preschool - where she did really well, and advanced tremendously the two years she was there. I had considered keeping her back for another year, but the last year at the preschool, which was very structured, she had done very well, advancing quite a bit. After discussion with her preschool teachers, we decided to go ahead and enroll her, since the opinion was that while, she was not up to the level of an average kg'er, she was catching up, and the exposure will be good for her - and if she had to repeat another year, it would help her in the long run.
If you can afford private school consider it. Otherwise, it depends on your school district and the openess of the school's administration. I would not want my children to attend a school where I could not meet with the principal and have a sincere discussion about meeting my child's needs. So, I would bypass the teacher (I think that ship has sailed) and discuss the situation with the principal - come to a consensus about her needs and placement.
By the way - your daughter may be protected by the Americans with Disabilities Act (very broad definition of disabled) which would mandate them to make accomodations for and consider her on a more individualized basis, they may not be aware of this and it may assist in that conversation.
Have a referral made for special education services, your daughter probably needs the extra help, she would get more indiviualized attention, and it would shut down this teacher. You would get alot of power if your daughter had an IEP.
I don't understand the problem. The teacher is keeping you informed of the deficiencies of your daughter's behavior. I would certainly hope she wouldn't just ignore it because your daughter is a bit slow! If she is disruptive, both you and the teacher need to address it because it's not fair to all of the other children, regardless of the fact that your daughter is developmentally delayed. That means nothing to a bunch of 5 and 6 year olds!
If you can afford private school consider it. Otherwise, it depends on your school district and the openess of the school's administration. I would not want my children to attend a school where I could not meet with the principal and have a sincere discussion about meeting my child's needs. So, I would bypass the teacher (I think that ship has sailed) and discuss the situation with the principal - come to a consensus about her needs and placement.
By the way - your daughter may be protected by the Americans with Disabilities Act (very broad definition of disabled) which would mandate them to make accomodations for and consider her on a more individualized basis, they may not be aware of this and it may assist in that conversation.
A private school doesn't mean that they are going to be any more accomodating or patient in this situation.
Agreed that I wouldn't want my child attending a school that there is not open communication between the parent and the staff,but a private school isn't going to gtd. that is going to happen.
Does your school district evaluate children prior to placing them in the classes? I know that our new district does here in PA and our old one where we just relocated from also did. Also, if your child attended preschool, did they have an end of the year evaluation for the students who were moving on to Kindergarten?
The teacher should have been aware not just because of your conversation with her but because she had seen your daughter's evaluations.
It also sounds as though the TA in the class is not acting appropriately and should certainly not be sharing information to anyone,whether it is a relative (especially another child) or not.
I don't understand the problem. The teacher is keeping you informed of the deficiencies of your daughter's behavior. I would certainly hope she wouldn't just ignore it because your daughter is a bit slow! If she is disruptive, both you and the teacher need to address it because it's not fair to all of the other children, regardless of the fact that your daughter is developmentally delayed. That means nothing to a bunch of 5 and 6 year olds!
A child taking a ball from another is normal and routine and not deserving of a sad face for a 5 year old. Of more concern to me would be the constant notes home on minor issues and the stop for me would be complaining to my other child about his sibling's conduct - completely inappropriate. Those are all signs that the child is not being treated fairly in that classroom - at least in my opinion.
My son will be 5 in January, the cut-off date is Dec.31. Even if he was within the cut-off date, I would not let him go to school, exactly for this reason - not being ready for school. He needs another year of being a kid. My skin crawls when I imagine he'd have to climb a school bus in a few days. He, the teacher, the class, myself, would be very unhappy.
I agree with Mickey. If she is developmentally delayed she will benefit greatly from special education. An IEP will protect her and qualify her for the special treatment she needs.
As a former preschool teacher, I would also say that pulling her out and putting her back in preschool is also a good option. I have never known a parent who held their child back that regretted it. I have known many, including myself, who sent our kids on and regretted it.
What you are doing is not working. Time to try something else. This is your child. You are her best advocate. Sometimes you have to shake the tree a little.
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