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My son is nearly 3 yrs old and has always been very obsessed with his numbers and letter. Lately though more than before, he actually gets very emotional if he's made to come away from them to eat lunch, and if his sister even touches one of his letter, he will actually get kind of mean about it. Short of taking them away, I really don't have any idea of how to handle this. Loving numbers and letter is a good thing, or so I thought.
Has anyone had a child that is obsessed with something and how did you handle it?
Let him. He won't starve. Let him have the letters during lunch. He's processing them, understanding them, storing them for future use. One day, he will completely lose interest, but all of that data will be sitting there waiting for him to put them all together into words.
Let him. He won't starve. Let him have the letters during lunch. He's processing them, understanding them, storing them for future use. One day, he will completely lose interest, but all of that data will be sitting there waiting for him to put them all together into words.
I'm more concerned about him being mean over them. I know kids can get possessive over their toys, but WOW. I'm thinking of putting the letters away, and only allowing him to play with them in a more controlled way. Also bringing in some books with letters a couple of dvd's that teach reading and other things. He isn't even 3 and he knows all his letters and numbers up to 30, so I don't think it will hurt him.
My son is nearly 3 yrs old and has always been very obsessed with his numbers and letter. Lately though more than before, he actually gets very emotional if he's made to come away from them to eat lunch, and if his sister even touches one of his letter, he will actually get kind of mean about it. Short of taking them away, I really don't have any idea of how to handle this. Loving numbers and letter is a good thing, or so I thought.
Has anyone had a child that is obsessed with something and how did you handle it?
For a 3 year old, I wouldn't worry about it, he's just obsessed and possessive, as long as he will play with other things with his sister, let his letters be all his, and teach his sister to leave those alone.
It's best I think that some things must be shared but some things can be "owned".
I agree with the previous poster. Yes, kids should learn to share and not be so possessive. But I think it helps kids if we recognize that they can have something that belongs only to them. It's how they can learn respect for property, theirs and ours. Once he knows that, he may be less mean about it with his sister. You can say these are yours, her xxx's are hers'. As far as the letter thing, I would not take them away. They're his obsession for now, and it's a good one at that. There will be other things later that will draw his interests.
It will all depend on the level of obsession. My dd was a pain about shoes around 2. She used to make me wear slippers around the house and all her dolls had to have shoes. She grew out of that.
On the other hand there was a thread in here where a teenager had OCD and was constantly counting things.
I would only worry about it if other people have commented on it. Sometimes we moms are way too vigilant. Does he go to preschool?
I would only worry about it if other people have commented on it. Sometimes we moms are way too vigilant. Does he go to preschool?
He isn't in preschool and he was born in October so he'll be waiting longer to start school. That is one of the things that bothers me though, because when he does start school, he's very likely to get mean with other kids or start crying if it's a teacher. He pushes his sister over if she tries to take one.
don't look at the letters as the problem, look at the behavior as the problem. When he gets mean, that is when you tell him something along the lines of.... "Johnny, since you hit Mary I will take your letters away until after lunch/nap/whatever. This teaches him that the behavior is not tolerated but does not draw attention to the obsession. On the other hand, he does need to know that there are things that are his. Sharing is all well and good, but all of the time.... not so great. I would make a deal with him, give him a beach towel.... show him how to lay it out. Tell his sister that when he is sitting on the towel, he doesn't have to share. Turnabout is fairplay.... she gets a beach towel too.
Treat the anger as behavior that needs attention and teach the children how to communicate (towel says leave me alone) without anger and you'll find that they will learn to take care of their own issues.
My son is nearly 3 yrs old and has always been very obsessed with his numbers and letter. Lately though more than before, he actually gets very emotional if he's made to come away from them to eat lunch, and if his sister even touches one of his letter, he will actually get kind of mean about it. Short of taking them away, I really don't have any idea of how to handle this. Loving numbers and letter is a good thing, or so I thought.
Has anyone had a child that is obsessed with something and how did you handle it?
3/4 yr olds are very possessive and get every entranced by certain activities. That is why it is suggested not to get overly upset if the first time you say "johnny, please put your toys down, it's time to eat lunch"...and you need to either ask Johnny again or actually go intervene. Their minds are not so far developed and they have to finish what they have started. It's not b/c they are purposely defying you...it's b/c they cannot just stop midway through something that truly interests them. And how long it takes them to finish isn't important...they just want to complete or stay on task. It's very, very common at this age. And why parents go so nutty & say "how many times do I have to ask you to stop playing and come eat lunch?" We are expecting them to think and behave at a level they are not at yet.
I also have to use the words "common sense" needs to be applied to the above statement.
I wouldn't automatically assume your child is going to be a monster at school b/c he is possesive with his toys at home & treats his sibling a certain way.
My son is going on 4 in Nov but in a 3's class for the year. According to his teaches, his a darn angel; shares; listens; follows directions (these things told to me this week at parent night...my mouth almost fell to the floor..).
At home with his younger sibling...big difference. The territorital fighting over even the smallest thing like a crayon is beyond ridiculous on certain days.
As long as you are teaching and showing him the proper ways to communicate and handle frustration, sharing, etc...over time he is going to figure it all out.
He is 3. THere are certain behaviors that should not be permitted..hitting, biting, screaming, yelling & so on...but so many others just come with the age and are more appropriate.
As parents it is up to us to show & teach them...it's not over night & it takes time.
So many expect their 3yr olds to relate to the adult mindset. It doesn't happen.
Again, he's 3, not 13 If these were being exhibited by even a 6yr old, there would be area for concern. But, for a 3yr old, typical. They are learning and thus why as parents, our job is so vital at this age. We are their teachers. They don't know at 3 just b/c it happens magically...they learn it from those around them & it TAKES TIME.
And from what others told me & what I am seeing first hand...you are going to be pleasantly surprised when he starts preschool and see that the work you've been putting into your child & the frustrations you deal with on a daily basis...they pay off.
He isn't in preschool and he was born in October so he'll be waiting longer to start school. That is one of the things that bothers me though, because when he does start school, he's very likely to get mean with other kids or start crying if it's a teacher. He pushes his sister over if she tries to take one.
I think he has to learn the importance of things over people. Make him play with his letters in his own room if he doesn't wish to share them. Just like when he goes to school, he shouldn't bring toys he doesn't want to share, he should leave those at home.
He's only 3 - and that's why 3 year olds aren't ready for kindergarten, they aren't emotionally mature yet, they can't reason much yet. He still has to learn that what he doesn't want to share, he should keep where others won't see and want.
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If these were being exhibited by even a 6yr old, there would be area for concern. But, for a 3yr old, typical. They are learning and thus why as parents, our job is so vital at this age. We are their teachers. They don't know at 3 just b/c it happens magically...they learn it from those around them & it TAKES TIME.
