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The fact is that telling some of these posters that they are callous(which I`ve done) does no good because when you DON`T have a conscious, YOU DON`T CARE and will continue to act this way.Either on the net or in person. Everything that others have said to these type of people have not changed who they are and more of them seemed to be joining in the conversation.
You didn't help the OP at all. She didn't need people who say homosexuality isn't okay and isn't normal. She already knew there were people in the world like you. But that's NOT how the OP feels about homosexuality. YOU are the one who used this thread to promote a platform. There's no beachmel shoulder to cry on. Beachmel only made this all about hating homosexuality. Basically, you've been telling the OP that her daughter is a freak who disrespected her. THAT is way off base and EXTREME. The OP needed to open communication with her daughter and your posting homosexual hate didn't help matters whatsoever. Your solution was to tell her that her daughter should apologize to her----as if the mother was justified in not speaking to her daughter for a month because her daughter didn't apologize. It amazes me that you don't realize how far off you were from helping the OP.
I've seen your posts on various threads....people like you are no help to anyone. You scurry about wreaking havoc with your insults and ranting. You can twist things as many ways as you want to....the end result is always the same....it's you that's twisted!
"men in love" or whatever your title is, you're right about something you said, I was never "sexually attracted" to women....only intellectually. As I got older though, I found that the majority of women out there, weren't the least bit intellectually attractive either. I'm not being judgemental about women, because there are oodles of wonderful women out there, I just don't have a tremendous amount of things in common with them. At the point in my life where I was angry with men, it was after my first marriage (very young). I had also come out of a home where I had a mother who worked full time, all the household and yard chores were "women's work" etc. I didn't personally know one woman who wasn't expected to hold down full time jobs, do all of the work around the house and yard, have dinner on the table when their man came home, etc., so that their men (who had had a hard day at work), could simply rest and relax. Oh.....and women were always expected to wear what their men liked and should always look good for their man, stay in shape, put out when they wanted sex, etc. The whole subservient BS scam made me sick. Well, it still does. Thank God I have a man who doesn't 'EXPECT' everything from me. He's grateful for what he's got!
OK beachmel, and that means that you were never gay or Bi to start with, so you really have no authority to say gay is any kind of choice. It isn't. Do you really think for a second that Bill or I would choose an existence where we are the most universally persecuted minority on the planet? To never know the joy of having kids of our own and showing them off to the folks? What the anguish was like when we each realized no matter what optimistic spin our parents put on it, underneath we knew it hurt them?
As well, again please remember that there are a lot of teens coming to grips with this dismaying discovery about themselves, and they have access to this site. Your words, and the words of others, have the power to convince them suicide is the easy way out. I often say this to christians and muslims etc when they start spouting off and pounding their drums about 'gay being a sin.' Those few words drip with the blood of countless suicides.
Try speaking with crisis line workers, like I have, if you have the stomach for it. Some of these suicides are by people at the collegiate level (post secondary).
OK beachmel, and that means that you were never gay or Bi to start with, so you really have no authority to say gay is any kind of choice. It isn't. Do you really think for a second that Bill or I would choose an existence where we are the most universally persecuted minority on the planet? To never know the joy of having kids of our own and showing them off to the folks? What the anguish was like when we each realized no matter what optimistic spin our parents put on it, underneath we knew it hurt them?
As well, again please remember that there are a lot of teens coming to grips with this dismaying discovery about themselves, and they have access to this site. Your words, and the words of others, have the power to convince them suicide is the easy way out. I often say this to christians and muslims etc when they start spouting off and pounding their drums about 'gay being a sin.' Those few words drip with the blood of countless suicides.
Try speaking with crisis line workers, like I have, if you have the stomach for it. Some of these suicides are by people at the collegiate level (post secondary).
-Doug of thosemeninlove
Doug,
My heart goes out to you. No one should be persecuted and treated cruelly. I hope you understand how truly heartfelt that statement is. I do not say those things lightly. However, it is still a choice one makes. To follow your "feelings", or not follow your feelings, in spite of the persecution you know is going occur, is a choice. It sounds like you knew those consequences were going to be there, and yet you still made that choice to follow your heart.
No one should ever make horrible derogatory remarks to anyone. You are not hurting anyone, not doing harm to anyone, so no one should be cruel. Unfortunately, the folks that are cruel to you for your decisions simply needed someone to bully and be cruel to. The fact that you are not what they consider "good enough or moral enough", simply gives them license to single you and other homosexuals out for their nasty little games. I would never (I mean it) be cruel or nasty to someone because of their chosen lifestyle. I don't agree with it, but as I've said, there are a lot of things that people do that I don't agree with. If they're not being cruel or mean, I try not to judge. I simply don't agree.
I smoke....nasty habit, I know.....and you know what? Some folks think that people who smoke are idiots, they stink, they're nasty and gross. Well, knowing that, I still smoke. They have their opinions....I have my "addiction/habit", whatever you want to call it. Sorry....LOL, long day, rambling on now.....gotta get back to sanding cabinets now. Have a great day Doug.....I mean it....and be happy.
lol thanks beachmel, but you still need to get your thoughts around the concept of this NOT being any kind of choice, unless you're suggesting a life of celibate loneliness, or ruining a girl's life with a deceitful and fake relationship. Both of which are horrible existences.
So when you insist it's a choice, what would have been what you consider the 'correct' choice?
I'll repeat: When we each came out, we had to wrestle with the dismay of knowing that we wouldn't be having kids and settling down with the world's approval. That we'd never have kids to show off to or respective folks. That no matter what kind of happy spin our parents put on it, we each knew they were hurting deeply, and blamed themselves. We blamed ourselves, til our parents found out and put an end to it. We still watch parents with their kids in a wistful wondering way, wondering what life could have been like if only we could have had a choice of sexual orientation.
For me it was doubly difficult as I'm christian, and was very very angry at God for doing this to me. Later I realized that I needed to have faith and trust God made me this way for a reason I couldn't understand.....yet. I think now that I know or have a glimmer of what that reason is. lol, I'm hijacking this thread so I'll shut up about me for now.
However, it is still a choice one makes. To follow your "feelings", or not follow your feelings, in spite of the persecution you know is going occur, is a choice. It sounds like you knew those consequences were going to be there, and yet you still made that choice to follow your heart.
You could choose on whether or not to act upon those said attractions and feelings. However, it is not a choice to those who were born gay or straight. Please get that right.
The whole issue about this side topic is that you made a very insulting comment on being gay is a choice. To many, it is not. They may choose to accept their inner gay but that is acceptance of who they are. Being gay is not a lifestyle anymore than heterosexuality is.
It's not really about whether or not you agree or disagree with homosexuality. It is about you insinuating that all gays chose this lifestyle because they loved being gay and wanted it right off the bat. Since you don't have any experience growing up gay, you really had no right to assume that at all.
lol thanks beachmel, but you still need to get your thoughts around the concept of this NOT being any kind of choice, unless you're suggesting a life of celibate loneliness, or ruining a girl's life with a deceitful and fake relationship. Both of which are horrible existences.
So when you insist it's a choice, what would have been what you consider the 'correct' choice?
I'll repeat: When we each came out, we had to wrestle with the dismay of knowing that we wouldn't be having kids and settling down with the world's approval. That we'd never have kids to show off to or respective folks. That no matter what kind of happy spin our parents put on it, we each knew they were hurting deeply, and blamed themselves. We blamed ourselves, til our parents found out and put an end to it. We still watch parents with their kids in a wistful wondering way, wondering what life could have been like if only we could have had a choice of sexual orientation.
For me it was doubly difficult as I'm christian, and was very very angry at God for doing this to me. Later I realized that I needed to have faith and trust God made me this way for a reason I couldn't understand.....yet. I think now that I know or have a glimmer of what that reason is. lol, I'm hijacking this thread so I'll shut up about me for now.
Doug,
I am so glad that your family is understanding and have not turned their backs on you like some families do. It sounds like you are a sweet, kind christian man and I'm sure God loves you very much. We don't always have the answers, but some day, I'm sure we'll all understand. Thanks for being so kind. It has been a real pleasure talking with you.
You could choose on whether or not to act upon those said attractions and feelings. However, it is not a choice to those who were born gay or straight. Please get that right.
The whole issue about this side topic is that you made a very insulting comment on being gay is a choice. To many, it is not. They may choose to accept their inner gay but that is acceptance of who they are. Being gay is not a lifestyle anymore than heterosexuality is.
It's not really about whether or not you agree or disagree with homosexuality. It is about you insinuating that all gays chose this lifestyle because they loved being gay and wanted it right off the bat. Since you don't have any experience growing up gay, you really had no right to assume that at all.
Had you bothered to read some of the stuff I've written, you'd see that I have never said ALL! Unfortunately, you and some others, only see what you want to see.
Had you bothered to read some of the stuff I've written, you'd see that I have never said ALL! Unfortunately, you and some others, only see what you want to see.
Don't be defensive and pick out only a tiny bit of my posts to respond to. You just don't want to fess up to any of your posts. And it's called comprehension
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Originally Posted by beachmel
The fact that YOU fail to realize that MOST of these people ARE choosing that lifestyle clearly shows YOUR ignorance...and your sense of morality!
Very, very few people are BORN gay.....the rest are simply playing with fire and are throwing fits because they can't manipulate others into agreeing with them!!!!!
Most people choose that lifestyle? I think not.
Very, very few people are born gay? I think not.
Just say that everyone whose is gay chooses it as a lifestyle
If that's not what you believe, then change your posts next time so it doesn't imply that next time Because the statement "very very few people who are born gay" is practically saying that all gays choose their lifestyle.
Geez..... did y'all ever think that maybe some people are born gay, and some people later become or choose to be that way? Hhmmmmm.........
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Because the statement "very very few people who are born gay" is practically saying that all gays choose their lifestyle.