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how do you think your daughter must feel? Please reach out to her, don't judge her. If you think 16 is too young to be experimenting sexually, fair enough but at least talk to her about it instead of shutting her out.
This is so important. It's hard enough being 16 and trying to figure out who you are, how you fit in, what you want to do with your life...but add this on top. And then add on top the fact that your home base, your family, your support group, your safety net...has abandoned you.
Harsh.
Put your feelings aside, op. This isn't about you. It's not about something that you did. This will not ruin your daughter's life. She needs you now.
[/u][/b] Is that not what she did , The actions of the daughter were wrong and showed that there was NO respect for the Parents ! EVER heard of "TOUGH LOVE "!. Counselors talk about it all the time, this I know of first hand. If we keep having to accept changes in our lives what does it matter weather or not we love our children , what does it matter if we do not teach them right from wrong? Why is it OK to a certain point then wrong after that. Where is this world going to end if we keep giving in to what "We"
( Some of us ) believe is wrong . LOVE has many different faces ( The words of a licensed counselor).
ummm, no.
For maybe the tenth time, Mom:
Freaked out.
Locked herself in the Bathroom
Passed out
Had to be taken to the Hospital
Has not talked to daughter since.
No Love in there. Tough or otherwise.
No Teaching in there, either. Only thing daughter could have learned from that is Mom cannot handle problems. Or even worse -- a really bad way to handle problems.
Do you need this in comic book form or pictures or something to get this?
Read your post...its not all about YOU. This is about your child. Your supposed to put your child first. Sad to say but your love for your child seems conditional on her growing up to be what you want but thats not love at all.
I feel NO sorrow for you, only your daughter for having to deal with your reaction and continued mis-treatment. My heart goes out to her, you are damaging her and there is no excuse for that.
You need to suck it up and remember that your the parent and she is your child.
This is a 16 YEAR OLD CHILD!!!!!!!! It is her parents' JOB to teach her right from wrong and if she's doing something WRONG it is their responsibility to tell her so! Since her daughter has clearly failed to talk to HER, it seems quite apparent that the child has NO respect or sense of what is right and wrong! The gall of some of the people on here who seem to think that the world revolves around selfish, self-centered children is sickening. Are people her really that blind to how screwed up kids are getting these days? Is it any wonder they are? Look at some of the crap that some of the adults our there are feeding them. It's like 1/2 of the world has gone nuts and 1/2 of the remaining people with morals are afraid to say anything, for fear of the crazies getting ticked off at them!! Jeezus people get some brains and morals!
This is so important. It's hard enough being 16 and trying to figure out who you are, how you fit in, what you want to do with your life...but add this on top. And then add on top the fact that your home base, your family, your support group, your safety net...has abandoned you.
Harsh.
Put your feelings aside, op. This isn't about you. It's not about something that you did. This will not ruin your daughter's life. She needs you now.
Need to ask who abandoned who? the mom as the Parent has shown to the daughter that she feels the daughter has abandoned her by her actions , moved away from her teachings. I didn't see anywhere in the post where the mom stated that this actions was something she had taught the child , or even stated she would condone such an action. So who drifted away from who ? Who abandoned who?. We keep saying their only children @ 16 yrs. But in some areas it would be ok to get married at the age of 12 yrs and have as many as 2 children by the age of 16yrs. . But I would bet many out there would be upset with this idea . When in fact that would be just your opinion. How do we get back to the children showing the respect of the parent that the children are wanting from the parent?
Wow...this is truly scary. I have a daughter, and if she ends up a lesbian, you bet I will be there giving her unconditional love and support. Hateful bigots in soceity will be mean enough (well, depending where you live)...I cannot see how a mother could be so cruel to her child like this. Very sad.
Homosexuality is a choice, not something you are born with. She chose to go to bed with this other girl. The notion that someone is born gay is absolute garbage and a lie. If one is born gay, can a three year old child be gay too?
Many people choose being gay all the time, it is called bisexuality. Many "gay" people get married to people of the opposite sex, have children (uh, why would a "gay" have straight vaginal sex, I as a "straight" would never sodomize another man.) and then later in life runs off. Then, it seems that the wronged party in the relationship (the usually poor woman mostly) has to 'come to terms' with it.
Homosexuality is being thrown at society and expects same to treat them with special reverence. Television and movies are pushing boundries to allow homosexuality mainstream access. Why? For what purpose? Homosexaulity causes sexual disease, violence, a higher usage of drugs (especially crank), depression and violence. This is what needs to be taught in school.
Concerning gay marriage, personally I think that the government needs to get out of the marriage business and just let people do what they want. Gays can get married. Just sign a social contract. Two people draw up a contract, merge assets and liabilitities and have everything in writing, then take to a lawyer and/or a notary and presto, you are married.
You know, if you want to be gay, that's fine by me. I am just sick of the lies and the bull**** that gays perpetuate on society. I dont want to see two men kissing in public or on my television. It's repulsive and disgusting. Stop with the gay marches, you look like idiots and are perpetuating a stereotype.
Everyone knows the truth about homosexuality, but we like to lie to ourselves because it is nicer and easier than the truth. People are NOT BORN GAY, and your daughter can change her sexual behavior. Tell her in no uncertain terms that this kind of activity is not allowed in your house, girls or boys. If she doesn't like it, she can leave when she is 18.
You know, if you want to be gay, that's fine by me. I am just sick of the lies and the bull**** that gays perpetuate on society. I dont want to see two men kissing in public or on my television. It's repulsive and disgusting. Stop with the gay marches, you look like idiots and are perpetuating a stereotype.
People like you are what's wrong with this country! Seriously, chill out. Ohh, you don't want to see gay men kissing. Too bad! It's their life...not yours...butt out! Disgusting and hateful...
Need to ask who abandoned who? the mom as the Parent has shown to the daughter that she feels the daughter has abandoned her by her actions , moved away from her teachings. I didn't see anywhere in the post where the mom stated that this actions was something she had taught the child , or even stated she would condone such an action. So who drifted away from who ? Who abandoned who?. We keep saying their only children @ 16 yrs. But in some areas it would be ok to get married at the age of 12 yrs and have as many as 2 children by the age of 16yrs. . But I would bet many out there would be upset with this idea . When in fact that would be just your opinion. How do we get back to the children showing the respect of the parent that the children are wanting from the parent?
I am one of those people who DID get married at 16. Yes, stupid choice, but mine. I was running a home of my own and working a full-time job. Yes. No child (so to speak). What you are saying is so RIGHT! I am sorry that there are so few people on this thread who seem to be able to, even remotely, grasp what it is you are saying. The daughter abandoned her mother.....not the other way around. The daughter has clearly chosen to continue to disrespect her mother by not going to her and apologizing for her behavior, for not apologizing for hurting her mother so badly, for not asking forgiveness. It is the child who is in the wrong here. Since the daughter seems incapable of having any consideration or empathy for her mother, then the mother does need to approach her. She probably doesn't feel up to it because she knows that her daughter would turn it around on her. I DO feel sorry for the OP.
From the time my children were small, they have always known how their father and I feel about homosexuality. They know that we don't hate people for choosing that lifestyle, but they have ALWAYS known how we would feel if they chose that lifestyle. They have always been told that we would still love them, but that we would never accept that lifestyle choice. If one of my children were to choose that lifestyle, they would do so KNOWING what our feelings would be concerning their actions/choice. They know it would be foolish, on their part, to expect anything less of us. "You know our stand, you know the consequences.....PERIOD".
Need to ask who abandoned who? the mom as the Parent has shown to the daughter that she feels the daughter has abandoned her by her actions , moved away from her teachings. I didn't see anywhere in the post where the mom stated that this actions was something she had taught the child , or even stated she would condone such an action. So who drifted away from who ? Who abandoned who?. We keep saying their only children @ 16 yrs. But in some areas it would be ok to get married at the age of 12 yrs and have as many as 2 children by the age of 16yrs. . But I would bet many out there would be upset with this idea . When in fact that would be just your opinion. How do we get back to the children showing the respect of the parent that the children are wanting from the parent?
The parents are completely within their rights to say, "While you live in my house, there will be no having sex (girls or boys), etc." And the child should respect and obey that. THAT is the respect that they should show and the parents should expect.
The idea that you think that the daughter is being gay to disrespect her parents or that she has any control over who she is attracted to is both misguided and sad. "Taught the child"? Wow. Just wow.
From the time my children were small, they have always known how their father and I feel about homosexuality. They know that we don't hate people for choosing that lifestyle, but they have ALWAYS known how we would feel if they chose that lifestyle. They have always been told that we would still love them, but that we would never accept that lifestyle choice. If one of my children were to choose that lifestyle, they would do so KNOWING what our feelings would be concerning their actions/choice. They know it would be foolish, on their part, to expect anything less of us. "You know our stand, you know the consequences.....PERIOD".
The fact that you actually think anyone is choosing anything shows your ignorance. I feel sad for your kids.
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