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I don't think it's about individual parents as much as our society as a whole.
Too rushed. People think they know how to do it right, but kids just keep getting thicker. I agree.
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Originally Posted by go phillies
Or maybe its just genetics. Not everyone who is overweight eats too much or doesn't exercise. Likewise, I know many skinny people who lead unhealthy lifestyles, eat garbage, smoke, drink their livers into a pickle, and never exercise.
The difference is, kids who were considered 'fat', were seldom THAT fat. At least not the flabby gross fat.
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Originally Posted by Mightyqueen801
We got exercise. Played tag, ran through the woods, climbed trees, roller-skated outside, rode bikes, played kickball in the street...my mother wouldn't let us stay inside and watch TV unless it was pouring rain outside. And some of us walked to school... That was before anyone knew what cholesterol was or any kind of food pyramid had been invented, either. Not that it's a bad thing that now we know one shouldn't eat bacon three times a week or put chunks of butter on all the vegetables, but the exercise made a difference.
And the exercise is what made a huge difference. Fat back then was a healthier fat.
It's interesting how some cut out fat (bacon, butter, etc.), and pay attention to that all so important pyramid and go to the gym and are less healthy than before any of that mattered to anyone. People were healthy even eating the bacon and butter, but people worked hard back then; physically hard.
Modern conveniences spoiled us all. The more convenient, the less work it takes. Not alwasy a good thing.
For kids, all that gaming entertainment and television makes kids fat without muscle. Flabby. Back when there were 'fat' kids in school, they were solid and strong.
As a mom of a chubby kid and a skinny kid I'll give you my insights.
When both were toddlers/preschoolers, they were very trim. My younger son was growing soooo fast from age 2-4 that he was frightfully gaunt looking. There was one year I worked a lot and he went from day care to preschool and then home and I would just stuff him with crackers, and treats, because I wasn't sure if he was getting very much to eat during the day. I suppose looking back I planted some bad habits back then, habits my older son avoided because he was being fed at home during the preschool years and his situation during that year or two (in a different school) was more stable.
Gradually #2 has become rather chubby. His personality is very different from his older brother. He is more content to be a homebody, even though his athletic skills are really good - he has great hand-eye coordination, and he's a great sprinter in swimming, but he prefers a slower pace of life than his brother. He's actually got a lot more upper body muscle than most 9 year olds. We talk about his size, and making healthy choices (sometimes he makes them, sometimes he doesn't), and we keep him active, and I think there is a gradual learning curve he has to follow to get back on track, and as he hits his growth spurt I'll think he'll even out very nicely. Do we sometimes get fast food, yes. But I spend a LOT of time prepping fresh fruit & veggie snacks and cooking from scratch as well. He does not eat school lunches, we pack home lunch that include a sandwich on wheat bread, water, fruit, some days carrots & dip or string cheese, and a small serving of fishy crackers or pretzels.
Older brother remains quite petite, but is constantly in motion, interested in everything, and a light eater, except that he LOVES sweets. I have to really make an effort to get protein into him every chance I get.
So I think these two would have different builds no matter what, but maybe I made some mistakes early on with #2 and he's having to re-learn good habits now. But at the same time, should #1 get a free pass on eating candy just because he's so trim? That's not good for him either. So don't judge kids at the burger joint too harshly, there could be more going on than you know.
While food choices certainly contribute to being over weight, it's by far not the only factor. So, no, I don't think it's an accurate connection.
You have to figure in genes, activity levels and health, in addition to emotional issues.
I actually see some kids so skinny these days that I worry that they are not getting much food at all, more so than I see fat kids.
I was in elementary school in the latter 60's/early 70's and we had about the same amount of 'fat' kids as my son's elementary school has now. Perhaps 1 or 2 for each grade level. And we had access to fast foods then too. Heck, I was skinny to normal size all through school, yet my lunch during high school consisted of a Coke and some chips. I didn't gain extra weight until having kids. (like many women do)
So I think these two would have different builds no matter what, but maybe I made some mistakes early on with #2 and he's having to re-learn good habits now. But at the same time, should #1 get a free pass on eating candy just because he's so trim? That's not good for him either. So don't judge kids at the burger joint too harshly, there could be more going on than you know.
Rate of metabolism plays a huge role in the body mass and build of a person. Both my brothers and sisters never had any issues when it came to burning off calories, but, taking after my father's side of the family, I always have, but was very active when young. The busier I am, even now, the more I burn but it isn't the same as being a youngster.
Even slow burning kids, if playing outside a lot climbing trees, running, etc. will burn off and have muscle tone. That's a different kind of fat than those who sit and not do much moving.
I'm with hypocore on this. There are too many issues to ascribe it to simply "bad parenting". Take my neighbors. Both parents and the older son are very fit and athletic. The younger girl (who has always been athletic also) is very large. I know they don't eat fast food often and they keep healthy food in the house. The girl has always been big. They have had her to numerous physicians, a nutritionist and offered a personal trainer. They encourage her continued participation in the sports she has grown up playing but of course, the larger she gets the more difficult it becomes for her. She is a teen and they cannot control everything she does at this point. All they can do is offer help and encouragement. Sound like bad parenting to you? OTOH, I have some relatives that are all stick thin and eat nothing but junk food and vitamin supplements (since they all hate fruits and veggies). They feel very superior since they are thin and frequently make snarky comments about overweight people in front of their kids...Good parents? Oh....and guess which family has the kids who are serious "gamers"....
ETA - I think many, many things come into play regarding this. As a society, a lot more of our entertainment is not active entertainment. Cable TV, cell phones, ipods, computers, videogames. Also processed (not necessarily "fast") food and soda - all the additives and corn syrup. Plus, when I was growing up we had gym class in elementary school and recess. PE was required every semester through HS. Budget cuts have caused many schools to drop PE (and for awhile some schools were dropping recess!) or at least limit it. Emotional issues are of course key also. Overeating can be a sign of depression or other emotional issues....Certainly not just parenting here.
Last edited by maciesmom; 02-01-2010 at 09:36 AM..
I'm with hypocore on this. There are too many issues to ascribe it to simply "bad parenting". Take my neighbors. Both parents and the older son are very fit and athletic. The younger girl (who has always been athletic also) is very large. I know they don't eat fast food often and they keep healthy food in the house. The girl has always been big. They have had her to numerous physicians, a nutritionist and offered a personal trainer. They encourage her continued participation in the sports she has grown up playing but of course, the larger she gets the more difficult it becomes for her. She is a teen and they cannot control everything she does at this point. All they can do is offer help and encouragement. Sound like bad parenting to you? OTOH, I have some relatives that are all stick thin and eat nothing but junk food and vitamin supplements (since they all hate fruits and veggies). They feel very superior since they are thin and frequently make snarky comments about overweight people in front of their kids...Good parents?
Thanks, and that reminds me....a previous neighbor is rail thin and has been all her life. She cooks and serves fried food almost daily. They frequent fast food places along with BBQ and ice cream places. If it were just about eating, she'd not be able to move.
Rate of metabolism plays a huge role in the body mass and build of a person. Both my brothers and sisters never had any issues when it came to burning off calories, but, taking after my father's side of the family, I always have, but was very active when young. The busier I am, even now, the more I burn but it isn't the same as being a youngster.
Even slow burning kids, if playing outside a lot climbing trees, running, etc. will burn off and have muscle tone. That's a different kind of fat than those who sit and not do much moving.
I agree. I've always had a meatier build (I mean I actually had more muscle mass than most women my age, besides being overweight after kids) and #2 takes after me more. #1 takes after dad's side of the family, much more lean and light.
Its important to emphasize play and exercise for just this reason. Once you hit a critical mass and get too big to have fun at a lot of sports and things, its all downhill.
I agree that for the most part it's a lifestyle issue, including inadequate nutrition, sleep, and exercise, but I dislike the implication that the blame lies solely on parents' and kids' shoulders. Trying to keep your family off junk food is a a Sisyphean task. Let's be honest here: it's relatively cheap, it's widely available, and it tastes good! Plus, junk food is typically shelf stable, which is essential today when we're all running back and forth to work and activities.
That said, even healthy looking foods are often packed with sugar (HFCS) and sodium. Ever look at the nutritional information on that granola bar your kid grabbed for an afternoon snack? Or the flavored yogurt you all ate for breakfast this morning? Yikes!
The problem is systemic. It's not just an issue of personal virtue.
Last edited by formercalifornian; 02-01-2010 at 10:10 AM..
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