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Growing up in Houston, my friends and I always used last names. But it seems common now to use Miss/Mr <first name> unless in school. I prefer to be called Miss <first name>, but if I am in a school setting I introduce myself with last name to be consistent with the teachers. Any K-12 school I've been in (several cities/towns in Texas) have always used last names. Preschools always use Mr/Miss <first name>. I've always asked the adult their preference when introducing an adult to my kids.
It is not common anywhere I've lived for an adult to be addressed by first name only.
I expect my kids to address adults formally, using Mr./Mrs. Lastname. However, I have told them that if the adult asks them to call them by first name it's ok to do so.
I am wondering at what age do you switch kids over to using first names? My son's friends still address me formally and I am starting to think that 16-18 year olds can address me by my first name.
Having lived in the south most of my life until a few months ago, I grew accustomed to children addressing me as, "Miss Betsy". My children address adults that aren't their children as Miss or Mr. so and so.
They also say maam and sir...I'm wondering if this is a cultural or regional thing, because my neighbors' kids call me by my first name, same with my husband.
How do your children address adults, or how do you prefer to be addressed?
I always taught my daughter to address adults by Mr. or Mrs. so-and-so, but sometimes closer friends were "Aunt" or "Uncle", even if they really weren't. Otherwise, if a friend or acquaintance introduced themselves to my daughter by first name, I told her to put "Miss" or "Mr." in front of it when they spoke with them.
Ma'am and Sir is definitely a regional thing--I think people in the south tend to teach their kids that they must say this whenever they address adults, while people in the north don't care if a kid calls them Ma'am or Sir. From reading one of the previous posts on here, however, it does not appear that these are universal rules of the south or north.
By Miss,Mr, Mrs. When I was kid, we never addressed any adult by their first name and I`m from the west originaly. We had adults make fun of us because we expected our son to not address adults by their first name. Also, other adults would insist that our son address them by their first name.Well, to bad for them because it wasn`t their child and it was our rules.That use to really tick me off! But it just goes to show why so many kids are so disrespectful to teachers and other adults now a days.A lot of Kids are not taught how to show respect to others anymore because their taught that it`s all about them.
By Miss,Mr, Mrs. When I was kid, we never addressed any adult by their first name and I`m from the west originaly. We had adults make fun of us because we expected our son to not address adults by their first name. Also, other adults would insist that our son address them by their first name.Well, to bad for them because it wasn`t their child and it was our rules.That use to really tick me off! But it just goes to show why so many kids are so disrespectful to teachers and other adults now a days.A lot of Kids are not taught how to show respect to others anymore because their taught that it`s all about them.
I think it is disrespectful to refuse to address someone the way THEY would like to be addressed. You are making it about YOU, when you should be thinking about how the other person wishes to be addressed.
I am wondering at what age do you switch kids over to using first names? My son's friends still address me formally and I am starting to think that 16-18 year olds can address me by my first name.
This was always weird for me, growing up with Mr/Mrs Lastname. Sometime after college and marriage (22yo) I began to transition to 1st names w/ old family friends (just 1st names, not Ms/Mr Firstname). Some of my friends still address my parents with Mr/Mrs Lastname, though.
Momma-Bear, it`s NOT disrespectful and I`m not making it about ME. I obviously disagree with what you said, completely. The adult is being disrespectful and underminding the parents authority....
We prefer that our kids call our friends and neighbors by Mr/ Miss/Mrs. Ms. First name. This possibly comes from living in Houston when we first started out as parents. For teachers and people we know less well (eg. the parents of my daughter's schoolmates) Mr/ Miss/Mrs. Ms. last name. I think that either can be used to show respect.
As far as when to stop using Mr/ Miss/Mrs. Ms (aunt and uncle too), I think most of the time it comes naturally, you grow up and develop a more peer-like relationship and it seems appropriate. If it does not come naturally, you either don't stop or you stop because the person requests it.
edited to add - It is also my opinion based on my experiences, that most adults who want kids to call them by their first names are not uncomfortable with adding Mr. or Ms. to it and most adults who prefer to be addressed as Mr./Ms. are not terribly upset by the use of a first name rather than a last name after. (the child's school teachers are an exception, of course)
Momma-Bear, it`s NOT disrespectful and I`m not making it about ME. I obviously disagree with what you said, completely. The adult is being disrespectful and underminding the parents authority....
It is absolutely about YOU. Your comments are about what YOU want your child to call someone and NOT about what they prefer to be called. Most people do not consider it respectful when a person, child or adult, ignores our preferences about how we want to be addressed.
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