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my son is almost 4 and an only child for now. there are times when i need to get things done and he needs to play by himself. he does not yet know how to read. are there any toys/games that work to keep your kids occupied? i am trying to stay away from video games and TV in this situation...i know those will surely keep him completely enthralled, but don't want to rely on them.
Does he like to do puzzles? my daughter is 4 also, my oldest is in school all day so it is just her & I during the day...
She loves puzzles, she loves to play on the chalkboard and whiteboard, I have activity books appropriate for her age that help her write her letters & numbers.
She loves the Elephant game that the butterflies come out of the elephant's trunk & she has to catch them with a butterfly net. Easily played alone.
Tons of craft things, shoestring cards (cards that they use string or yarn to simulate sewing...) or just coloring, things like that...
She doesn't play for long periods of time by herself, but the above help when I do need to get things done.
i have this "problem" too. he won't play alone for long. i understand that a child's attention span is on the short side.
he does love puzzles, but likes for me to sit and watch him do them. i feel awful, but need to get stuff done.
..he does love puzzles, but likes for me to sit and watch him do them. i feel awful, but need to get stuff done.
Don't. If he doesn't always have an audience, he will begin to entertain himself and be happy spending time alone. He's at the age that he shouldn't have to be directed all the time. He should be able to go into his room and find something to do and play by himself for parts of the day.
If he has toys that he enjoys in his room, he will get used to it. I had to do that when my daughter was that age. I finally got to where I'd say to play with her toys for a while and she would spend some time occupying herself.
It isn't good for kids who are grown enough to have preferences to have to be told what to do all the time. Kids at the age of 4 are capable of going into their room or playroom and finding something on their own. It's a very important stage in their development. Rob them of that and they will be dependent for a whole lot longer than you want them to be.
I recommend Legos. My 5 year old son is obsessed with them. I am talking about the model legos that have instructions on how to build a specific structure or vehicle. He spends hours on his own building these things. It keeps him busy, improves motor skills and gives him practice in following directions. Putting together these models also require a lot of concentration and discipline.
I recommend starting with the easy lego models that are labeled "easy to build". Then he can work up to the models starting with the age of 5 (like "City"). Some are quite challenging and you may need to help him occasionally. For the hard lego models, I check his work about every one or two pages.
I have 2 kids close in age, and even then I needed time to get stuff done. One needs lot of attention, the other can spend considerable time playing with cars or PlayStation -- looking at the games, I can see that they develop coordination, quick thinking, not speaking of the attention span . Guilty of using TV and PS - and eventually a computer where there are online games for children (we started at around 4, simple child-oriented online game sites like Nick do not require reading). Now at 5 and 6, I see no harm done by all the technology they have been exposed to. The 1st grader is into book reading and "writing books" now, so that hasn't impeded her in any way.
You can only adhere to "ideal" rules for so long. I was the best parent when I was childless with all these wonderful ideas about child-rearing.
my son is almost 4 and an only child for now. there are times when i need to get things done and he needs to play by himself. he does not yet know how to read. are there any toys/games that work to keep your kids occupied? i am trying to stay away from video games and TV in this situation...i know those will surely keep him completely enthralled, but don't want to rely on them.
Rely on him. The ability to occupy himself will come in handy throughout life. As a teacher, one of the issues I deal with, daily, is that kids have grown up being entertained all the time. This leads to behavior issues in class when they don't feel, adequately, entertained.
Do your son and his future teachers a favor. Let him learn to occupy himself. Put him in a safe area, with some things to choose from and let him figure out how to occupy his time.
This is something that is best started far earlier than 4, so now you have to backtrack some and teach him how to be his own company/entertainment.
I'd start with using your tasks as the basis for what he does instead of vice versa. So, for instance, if you need to wash dishes, either he can get a stool and help you, or he can play with playdoh, draw pictures or do puzzles on the kitchen table while you do dishes nearby. That allows you to get done what you need while still being close enough that he feels you are involved in what he does, if only by being present.
If you need to do laundry, same thing. Let him help or have him do something nearby. You can fold clothes on his bed while he plays with legos on the floor. You can hang clothes in closets while he trails along pulling a toy. He can carry one basket while you carry the other and make up stories as you walk.
Include him where you can, keep up a conversation where needed, but at the same time use your attention to do what you need to do instead of entertaining him.
Make a schedule to make it easier. Say from wake up time until an hour later he is free to play in his room while you get ready for the day. Then for the next hour you two do things together that he wants to do. The next hour is for your chores and he can help if he wants. Next hour is outside time. Next hour is free play again for both of you. Next is lunch. And so on....doesn't have to be specific times, but a general guide as to what comes next will help him prepare for each different one.
Hypocore, that would drive me insane. For one thing, kids don't need to be in sight of the parent at all times. Presumably bedrooms are safe and full of belongings. Kids at the age of 4 should be able to spend time in their bedrooms without constant supervision or constant parental presence. It's a lot healthier for them to be on their own choosing what they want to play with.
Following a schedule like that would make me crazy.
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