Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 03-09-2010, 12:16 PM
 
2,605 posts, read 4,680,223 times
Reputation: 2194

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ivorytickler View Post
Tell that to my 14 year old . She keeps telling me it's MY house so I should clean it. Doesn't work but she keeps trying. Somehow this makes sense in her mind.
Mine is 16. When I ask her why not help out, she always comes back with, "But you always do it, how am I supposed to know that you want me to?" To her credit though, she does do some things, like yesterday she cleaned the entire bathroom, including the toilet. She thought she would melt or something, but she didn't.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 03-09-2010, 12:42 PM
 
Location: Western Washington
8,003 posts, read 11,696,940 times
Reputation: 19539
IvoryTickler & NoExcuses. I don't get it either. Sometimes the kids act like they're doing you a favor when they pick up THEIR stuff, even after they've been told a couple of times.

How about this, do your's pick up their stuff to take to their rooms, then simply set it down somewhere in the next room? That's a famous one around here...and then that item will sit there for a week!

Having several kids, I find it ironic that they can see the other kids' messes, and yet don't see theirs at all. "ME? He needs to come and pick HIS stuff up. It's all OVER the place!" Yet, what the grumbling child isn't seeing?...is that he has 14 things laying around the room, the one he's grumbling about took off his shoes, socks, and left his bookbag in the room! Kids! God love 'em!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-09-2010, 02:23 PM
 
758 posts, read 1,867,911 times
Reputation: 954
Quote:
Originally Posted by beachmel View Post
IvoryTickler & NoExcuses. I don't get it either. Sometimes the kids act like they're doing you a favor when they pick up THEIR stuff, even after they've been told a couple of times.

How about this, do your's pick up their stuff to take to their rooms, then simply set it down somewhere in the next room? That's a famous one around here...and then that item will sit there for a week!

Having several kids, I find it ironic that they can see the other kids' messes, and yet don't see theirs at all. "ME? He needs to come and pick HIS stuff up. It's all OVER the place!" Yet, what the grumbling child isn't seeing?...is that he has 14 things laying around the room, the one he's grumbling about took off his shoes, socks, and left his bookbag in the room! Kids! God love 'em!

Putting stuff at the bottom of the stairs is a famous one around here. I say "take it upstairs now" and I get "I'll take it up when I go up there" now I have learned, after things will sit there and they pass by them 100 times up and down the stairs, to say " No you will take it up now".
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-09-2010, 02:26 PM
 
Location: Right where I want to be.
4,507 posts, read 9,038,208 times
Reputation: 3360
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ivorytickler View Post
Tell that to my 14 year old . She keeps telling me it's MY house so I should clean it. Doesn't work but she keeps trying. Somehow this makes sense in her mind.
Yeah, that would fly about as well as a turd with wings in my house.
But, I might just give them what they want to make a point.
We'd have a It's MY House Celebration Day...starting off with, get off my couch, turn off my TV, that's my bathroom (after all, I cleaned it) but I'll give you that bush in the backyard, those are my dishes, that's my soda, that dog is mine too....I hope you enjoy MY day!!

Something similar worked very well when I had asked my 11 yo to get forks out of the dishwasher for breakfast. She complained (while moaning and rolling eyes) "I do all the work around here!!!" I gave her just what she suggested was true...all the work in the house for the day. She didn't even make it to lunch before breaking down. LOL....give 'em what they want or what they think is reality, it works most of the time. It's been 4 years and she's NEVER said anything like that to me again.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-09-2010, 02:34 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
24,012 posts, read 28,379,095 times
Reputation: 41122
Quote:
give 'em what they want or what they think is reality,
That works well for a lot of things. When my DD (the oldest) would complain about her younger brother not having as many chores as she did, that it wasn't "FAIR", I just calmly asked if she really wanted everything to be "equal" (which is what she meant by fair)....of course she said "YES!". I said OK, they proceeded to take away the privileges that went along with being older (being able to go somewhere by herself, being allowed to have friends over, use the telephone etc etc). The fun of "equal" didn't last too long!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-09-2010, 02:50 PM
 
758 posts, read 1,867,911 times
Reputation: 954
Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
That works well for a lot of things. When my DD (the oldest) would complain about her younger brother not having as many chores as she did, that it wasn't "FAIR", I just calmly asked if she really wanted everything to be "equal" (which is what she meant by fair)....of course she said "YES!". I said OK, they proceeded to take away the privileges that went along with being older (being able to go somewhere by herself, being allowed to have friends over, use the telephone etc etc). The fun of "equal" didn't last too long!

That is too funny. My DD used to pull that one a lot too. She is 5 years older than her brother but expected him to have the same exact chores she did, but when I suggested the same thing (having equal privileges), well then that was a different story.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-09-2010, 02:54 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
24,012 posts, read 28,379,095 times
Reputation: 41122
Quote:
Originally Posted by skahar View Post
That is too funny. My DD used to pull that one a lot too. She is 5 years older than her brother but expected him to have the same exact chores she did, but when I suggested the same thing (having equal privileges), well then that was a different story.
Funny how that works isn't it.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-09-2010, 03:09 PM
 
Location: Whoville....
25,386 posts, read 35,440,837 times
Reputation: 14692
Quote:
Originally Posted by beachmel View Post
IvoryTickler & NoExcuses. I don't get it either. Sometimes the kids act like they're doing you a favor when they pick up THEIR stuff, even after they've been told a couple of times.

How about this, do your's pick up their stuff to take to their rooms, then simply set it down somewhere in the next room? That's a famous one around here...and then that item will sit there for a week!

Having several kids, I find it ironic that they can see the other kids' messes, and yet don't see theirs at all. "ME? He needs to come and pick HIS stuff up. It's all OVER the place!" Yet, what the grumbling child isn't seeing?...is that he has 14 things laying around the room, the one he's grumbling about took off his shoes, socks, and left his bookbag in the room! Kids! God love 'em!
Oh yes, the pile just moves from room to room and mine point out what the other one leaves lying around all the time. Mine seem to have selective sight as well as selective hearing .
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-09-2010, 03:11 PM
 
Location: Coastal Georgia
50,117 posts, read 63,519,992 times
Reputation: 92766
I know you don't like hearing it, but your daughter knows she can get away with anything and it's only going to get worse.
You and you husband need to get on a united front right now. I'd strip everything out of her room, except a change of clothes and a mattress, and make her earn back everything else.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-09-2010, 03:30 PM
 
2,605 posts, read 4,680,223 times
Reputation: 2194
Quote:
Originally Posted by beachmel View Post
..How about this, do your's pick up their stuff to take to their rooms, then simply set it down somewhere in the next room? That's a famous one around here...and then that item will sit there for a week!
Mine will take her things into her room and forget where they are. It's like they disappear.
Quote:
Originally Posted by beachmel
Kids! God love 'em!
SOMEBODY has to. Just kidding.

Quote:
Originally Posted by NCyank View Post

Something similar worked very well when I had asked my 11 yo to get forks out of the dishwasher for breakfast. She complained (while moaning and rolling eyes) "I do all the work around here!!!"
Where do they get that anyway??? It's like they're born with a list or something.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 04:35 AM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top