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Old 03-25-2010, 05:05 PM
 
Location: El Paso, TX
3,503 posts, read 4,531,038 times
Reputation: 3021

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anna-isms View Post
My child is listening to heavy metal satanic music, is this a physiological problem?

She is a junior in high school, never had a boyfriend before, doesn't have any friends that she really talks too, and gets bad grades.

I am concerned about her doing witchcraft or committing suicide. What should I do? I have taken her to a phycriatist but all she said was that your daughter is depressed.

She grew up in a Christian household and anything like heavy metal would not be allowed.

What should be my next step?
It is probably because you may be so strict with your religious values that she may be rebeling against the way you demand she live.

Now, the comment to accept your daughter for who she is makes sense. However, I do not believe in just letting them do whatever they want without you as a parent encouraging to see other ways of looking at life, not force it. I just do not believe in a total hands off approach and not try to channel their life.
You judge how you live. You are looking at her on how you lived your life as a teenager. Not having boyfriends is not necessarily a bad thing. Maybe she is not ready for that. Has it crossed your mind she could show more maturity than you when you were a teenager and not have boyfriends because she may want to wait for when she is older?

Do you talk to her about these things in a non-judgemental way instead of looking through her things? Why not simply sit down with her and try to understand why she likes that music? Why not ask her what are her dreams, her goals, etc. instead of maybe telling her how bad is what she is doing and her preferences in music and social interaction?

You have a great day.
El Amigo

 
Old 03-25-2010, 05:10 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
24,012 posts, read 28,332,366 times
Reputation: 41121
I would be a LOT more concerned about her grades and lack of friends (she has NO friends or only a few? None would worry me; "not very many" wouldn't) than I would be about her choice in music or whether she has boyfriends. Some people just hit their stride later.
 
Old 03-25-2010, 05:14 PM
 
5,906 posts, read 5,720,624 times
Reputation: 4570
Quote:
Originally Posted by Anna-isms View Post
I went though her room and found a heavy metal bands album. They are definitely satanic. I read the lyrics and was appalled. How could anyone actually enjoy this music unless they are a satanist or have serious emotional problems?
LOL. Which bands? Slayer? Would it interest you to know that they, like most 'satanic'/'evil' bands, have a particular schtick to attract fans and gain attention?

It's pretty apparent you have no idea what you're talking about.

Metal music is very therapeutic for many people. It's a safe outlet for aggression and rage...in this case, possibly against your snooping or your brand of Christianity? Maybe?

Quote:
When I was her age I had already had 10 boyfriends, it just isn't normal for a teen not to be at least mingling with members of the opposite sex or calling them on the phone.
In junior high? 10 boyfriends?

Nope, she is definitely NOT the one with the problems here.

Quote:
She has told me herself that she doesn't have any friends. She has been put on depression medication and of course they are not working. I have tried to talk to her about it, but for most of the day she just stays locked up in her room, listening to music or on the computer, watching t.v. etc., We don't really even have a mother-daughter relationship anymore. Every time that I come home from work she is in her room. Every time I suggest that we go out somewhere like to the mall, she says she doesn't feel like it or just completely ignores me. I feel like that room is her prison. Out of our discussions with her depression all she would tell me is that she is fine, and that she likes heavy metal music, just because she likes it. I just want her to be happy.
Then leave her alone. If any of this story is real, she is likely avoiding you.
 
Old 03-25-2010, 05:24 PM
 
1,963 posts, read 4,964,925 times
Reputation: 1456
Wow, just can`t believe what I`m hearing on here....

Anna-isms, I hope you take what others have said here with a grain of salt. One said "leave her alone" That`s stupid advice.
 
Old 03-25-2010, 05:26 PM
 
Location: Minnesota
1,481 posts, read 3,930,270 times
Reputation: 2434
LMAO.. yeh the kid has YOUR chain.. lighten up mommie.. she is fine .. go get her the christian metal if your really concerned about what she is listening to .. it sounds like the other stuff YOUR worried about and she can drownd your voice out with something more acceptable .. she is being NORMAL ..
 
Old 03-25-2010, 05:28 PM
 
Location: Space Coast
1,988 posts, read 5,364,490 times
Reputation: 2768
Quote:
Originally Posted by jkcoop View Post
By the way - I might add - I'm a huge heavy metal fan. That's pretty much what we listen to in the house.

We are all normal, respectful people. My husband and I (married 23 years) both have jobs, our son is a good student, works at the local ski hill on weekends with the children's ski school.

The music does not the person make.
Same here. We listen to all types of metal, including death metal and black metal. One of our favorite shows is metalocalypse, which is pretty good comedy. We aren't Satanic, and we are well educated, productive members of society.

I agree with the other posters who mentioned that depression, lack of friends, and poor grades should be the real concern.
 
Old 03-25-2010, 05:30 PM
 
5,906 posts, read 5,720,624 times
Reputation: 4570
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eresh View Post
Same here. We listen to all types of metal, including death metal and black metal. One of our favorite shows is metalocalypse, which is pretty good comedy. We aren't Satanic, and we are well educated, productive members of society.

I agree with the other posters who mentioned that depression, lack of friends, and poor grades should be the real concern.
Agreed. The music is likely an outlet.
 
Old 03-25-2010, 05:34 PM
 
Location: 38°14′45″N 122°37′53″W
4,156 posts, read 10,977,842 times
Reputation: 3437
I just don't believe this OP at all. Comes off terribly trollish.
 
Old 03-25-2010, 05:42 PM
 
1,963 posts, read 4,964,925 times
Reputation: 1456
anna-isms, Also, There is nothing to worry about her not having a boyfriend yet. It will eventually happen and I think it`s much easier for kids as teenagers to not have to deal with that part of life yet. They`ve got enough to deal with. As far as the witchcraft thing, unless you see evidence of her dabbling in it, I wouldn`t worry about it.
 
Old 03-25-2010, 05:42 PM
 
Location: Tucson, AZ
1,389 posts, read 3,517,612 times
Reputation: 700


Edit to add: I don't understand what all the fuss is about. I am not religious (christian, satanic or otherwise) so maybe I am missing something but: Whats wrong with being satanic? From my perspective its the same as being christian IE worshiping your deity of choice.
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