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Oh boy I'ma gonna get trashed for this BUT</p> Grab that spoiled brat by the back of her neck and bend her over the end of the couch and beat her a$$.. Thats how you get control of this kinda kid .. a trip behind the wood shed kept most of us in line and outta trouble once a year ..
And Yes I am a jerk ..
I wouldnt take that crap from my kids or my grandkids .. ever..
"talking" to kids like this is like a namby pamby shampoo at the hairdressers .. yanno the light touch that doesnt feel like you got a shampoo.. yeh well a good dose of reality is due that brat so .. either a boot camp or jail time awaits her ( andf the boys) if you dont get control asap ..
Drag the brat down stairs by the hair at meal time .. make her do the dishes , make her act like a human being instead of the queenand then take the cell the tv and the other stuff she expects of you and sell it off .. and while your at it tell her she has head lice
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yeh yeh I am mean but a smart a$$ kid like this does need a heavy handed dose of reality
and if she calls the cops ... tell her you best be gone when I get home in the morning .. or demand the social worker take right then .. .. foster care is a great wake up call .................................................. .................................................. ....I won't trash you. I think there have been some great suggestions here. Stripping the girls room and making her earn back her privileges one at a time is a good one. However, if the kid really behaves this badly, I think it might be a good idea to start things over with a butt whipping. For alot of kids, thirteen would definitely be too old for this. However, if she is behaving like her mother describes, I'd make an exception in her case. Once you do that, she maybe a little more receptive to listening and taking her parents more seriously.
No - there really are very dysfunctional families out there. One guy at work was telling me that he and his wife completely don't know what to do with their 15 year old daughter because she drinks and stays out all night when she wants to.
He said she'll come home at 3 or 4 in the morning and they have no clue where she was all night. She tells them "f... off" if they try to ask. He said they tried to ground her but they would hear nothing in her room, open the door and find nothing but an opened window.
He said that she does just whatever she wants, has zero respect for either parent and they're very afraid that some day she's not going to come home at all and she'll be found murdered by some pervert or in a car accident with a drunk driver or a victim of date rape drugs.
They try the same old techniques, they try to reason with her but she simply tells them "f... off", they try to send her to her room for a time out but she leaves the house. He said they can't do anything anymore but just hope she somehow turns out okay.
That 15 year old must be paying the mortgage. No way on earth would my wife and I allow that nonsense.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Faworki1947
Oh boy I'ma gonna get trashed for this BUT
Grab that spoiled brat by the back of her neck and bend her over the end of the couch and beat her a$$.. Thats how you get control of this kinda kid .. a trip behind the wood shed kept most of us in line and outta trouble once a year ..
And Yes I am a jerk ..
I wouldnt take that crap from my kids or my grandkids .. ever..
"talking" to kids like this is like a namby pamby shampoo at the hairdressers .. yanno the light touch that doesnt feel like you got a shampoo.. yeh well a good dose of reality is due that brat so .. either a boot camp or jail time awaits her ( andf the boys) if you dont get control asap ..
Drag the brat down stairs by the hair at meal time .. make her do the dishes , make her act like a human being instead of the queenand then take the cell the tv and the other stuff she expects of you and sell it off .. and while your at it tell her she has head lice
======
yeh yeh I am mean but a smart a$$ kid like this does need a heavy handed dose of reality
and if she calls the cops ... tell her you best be gone when I get home in the morning .. or demand the social worker take right then .. .. foster care is a great wake up call ..
You get nods of approval. No one will trash you!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by nightcrawler
I couldn't even finish reading your first post, but a parent does not or should not ever have to give in to a 13 years old's demands, are you kidding me. Your daughter sounds like a royal spoiled brat. She knows everyone will give in to her.
I think what your daughter needed was a good old fashioned crack across the mouth. Your husband isn't doing you any favors by giving in to her.
I always remember my mother saying, "This is my house, you have to abide by my rules" Now as a parent I have from time to time used that phrase......it works just wondefully....
If your daughter doesn't like the rules of your home, tell her to pack up, get a job, move out and ruin her life.
I have absolutely no patience or sympathy for Parent s that cannot control their children.
Sounds like the husband needs his own set of rules, too.
LOL...so true.
Quote:
Originally Posted by NY Annie
Yes, I do. Rules cannot be enforced if they are unknown. By posting a list of rules, it makes it clear to the child what is expected of her. And it reminds the parents.
It is not simply posting a list of rules. It is posting a list of rules by the new sheriff who makes some drastic changes. The list of rules is reinforcement for those changes and a spelling out of the NEW way the town is going to be run.
Also, IF she should report her parents to child services or the police for restricting her, removing her creature comforts, and claiming she is being otherwise abused, the list POSTED for all to see makes it clear to anyone AND EVERYONE just what is expected and makes it clear she is not being abused by having her privileges (not rights) removed.
Remember, designer clothing, more than one pair of footwear are privileges, not rights. A cellphone (ANY phone for that matter), tv, stereo, etc are PRIVILEGES. They have to be earned. If she were put in a group home, she would have none of those things.
Children are smart (not wise). They know the law - and worse, they know that parents mostly are afraid of having child services involved and children USE that knowledge. So protecting the parents is part of the reason why having rules posted will work.
BTW, I was party to a child having his room stripped to bare bones (not my kid). It didn't take more than a couple weeks for him to come around and sing a new song. It works. But you can't take away a behavior without replacing it with a new one. Having the list of rules ready at the same time as implementing something as drastic as stripping her room gives her (any child) a clear understanding what the new sheriff in town expects.
The child was 11 and heading towards serious problems. He was playing both parents against each other and the father realized he was as guilty as the mother in permitting the behavior but he was willing to change things. So, the computer, gameboy, tv, games, etc. were removed along with the bed frame and most of the clothing. He had left: a mattress on the floor (no pillow); a blanket; clean sheets that he was required to put on the mattress; 1 pair of shoes, 5 pair of school pants,5 school shirts, a pair of pajamas, and 2 pair of jeans and 2 shirts. He was told what the new rules were and handed a list of the rules. It included him doing his own laundry. It included him cleaning his room. The rules also included the rewards for following the rules - earning 1/2 hour of tv time in the family room; earning a snack after dinner; a trip to the library, 1/2 hour of telephone time - (landline in the kitchen with supervision), even earning one special item of clothing (with a girl, how easy to let her pick a favorite outfit or jewelry or make-up! yeah, make-up is a privilege not a right.)
Not having his room clean, or laundry done, or dishes, put him back to square one and lost all privileges earned. He tried the reporting to child services through the school. He was listened to, and he was asked what he thought his parents were required to provide for him. Shut him up fast.
It does help to alert the school what your intentions are. In the above situation, the principal was told what Dad was doing and he took off work to prepare the child's room for the new sheriff. While the principal didn't think the situation called for such a "drastic" plan, she did agree with the concept. She later was fully onboard with this plan. It won't work for all parents. But only because most parents are afraid to do it.
Great Points, and I love the ideas and rules. Just implementing them and applying them should shock her into rethinking her behavior in no time. Again, hubby must be on board to make sure the rules will be enforced.
No way -- treat her to a trip for being an imbecilic spoiled brat? I don't reward bad behavior.
Every behavior has a consequence, whether it's immediate or delayed, there is a consequence. The OP and her husband have permitted their daughter to act as she does. The consequence for that behavior is a child who is spoiled, inconsiderate, rude, undisciplined, unlikable (not unlovable), etc. Each and every time Daddy didn't say no and Mommy didn't have a talk with Dad, the consequence was to reinforce the bad behavior of daughter - and the IMMEDIATE consequence to Mom and Dad was peace and quiet. So now they pay for their laziness. So does daughter.
Where is the OP? I haven't seen any responses from her. Guess she wanted some easy/lazy solution.
Come on this is a teenage kid of course they are going to demand, whine, manipulate and anything else they can think of to get what they want..
YOU are the parents she's thirteen:
She locks the door - take the door off the hinges.
She demands over texts beyond the limits you set - Take the phone away
She doesnt do well in school - take away her skateboard teacher
She cant go to the moves at an approrpriate time - She doesnt go.
She wants room service - She doesnt eat
I understand that she's a teenager and you have to pick your battles but by giving her everything she want your the one creating a monster as for you and your husband you need a sit down with him and get on the same page or else or else you'll end up having to ask your daughter for permission to leave the house... lol
I am not opposed to physical punishment - but it needs to be appropriate and not abusive. If you use a belt, that's abuse.
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No one will trash you!! 
