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Old 05-22-2018, 02:09 PM
 
13,262 posts, read 7,961,430 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
No problem.

The problem arises when people get in a huff and make comments about other people not being respectful for *not* using those honorifics or when they make some comment that they use those words because THEY were "raised right". Or my personal favorite, "It's better than saying 'hey you,' " as if that's the singular alternative to "excuse me ma'am".

I agree with you. It DOES seem to be a regional thing, and about how one was raised. If we're raised to say sir and ma'am, we will likely say it til we die.
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Old 05-22-2018, 02:41 PM
 
Location: Coastal SC
153 posts, read 129,215 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
Congrats. Mine are too

I haven't prompted them to say "sir" or "ma'am" in YEARS, and they still do it by choice. They also are really good at meeting people "where they're at," though, and will assess a situation and speak to people as they wish to be addressed.

I like living in a region where this kind of respectful behavior is appreciated and not denigrated, and I cannot imagine being the kind of person who would be offended at being addressed with respect. Ridiculing others for doing something out of kindness only proves my point, so thanks for making it easy.
Could it possibly be less of a choice and more of a natural habit at this point?
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Old 05-22-2018, 03:47 PM
 
Location: Texas
13,480 posts, read 8,315,360 times
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I think it's rude for a younger adult to say "Sir" or "Ma'am" to an older adult. Both are adults.
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Old 05-22-2018, 04:16 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
24,012 posts, read 28,379,095 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PriscillaVanilla View Post
I think it's rude for a younger adult to say "Sir" or "Ma'am" to an older adult. Both are adults.

Nonsense.


Any sincere show of respect to another person -of any age- is never rude.
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Old 05-22-2018, 04:17 PM
 
13,976 posts, read 25,867,130 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PriscillaVanilla View Post
I think it's rude for a younger adult to say "Sir" or "Ma'am" to an older adult. Both are adults.
Rude of who? I think you need to check the definition of "rude".
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Old 05-22-2018, 07:20 PM
 
16,825 posts, read 17,663,609 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
Nonsense.


Any sincere show of respect to another person -of any age- is never rude.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattie View Post
Rude of who? I think you need to check the definition of "rude".
I actually kind of get what she means. If someone is say in their 30s and someone is in their 40s, "ma'am"ing them all the time would be a constant reminder that they are older. That is not respectful, especially not if you are in a professional or social setting, and might even be considered rude.
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Old 05-22-2018, 07:25 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
24,012 posts, read 28,379,095 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
I actually kind of get what she means. If someone is say in their 30s and someone is in their 40s, "ma'am"ing them all the time would be a constant reminder that they are older. That is not respectful, especially not if you are in a professional or social setting, and might even be considered rude.
She said nothing about ma'am-ing them all the time. That would be awkward in any event. I stand by my statement that any sincere show of respect is not rude. Intent is paramount when discussing politeness and rudeness. Obsequiousness is rarely sincere.

Last edited by maciesmom; 05-22-2018 at 07:48 PM..
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Old 05-22-2018, 08:09 PM
 
13,976 posts, read 25,867,130 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
I actually kind of get what she means. If someone is say in their 30s and someone is in their 40s, "ma'am"ing them all the time would be a constant reminder that they are older. That is not respectful, especially not if you are in a professional or social setting, and might even be considered rude.
Ma'am is not an address restricted by age, any more than sir is, at least once the recipient has reached adulthood. And the terms are widely used, and accepted, in a professional setting in the south. Personally, I far prefer to be called ma'am over "sweetie", "honey" or "dear" (also widely heard here).

Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
She said nothing about ma'am-ing them all the time. That would be awkward in any event. I stand by my statement that any sincere show of respect is not rude. Intent is paramount when discussing politeness and rudeness. Obsequiousness is rarely sincere.
Yes.
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Old 05-22-2018, 09:30 PM
 
12,883 posts, read 13,911,028 times
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Only times I ever said "sir" or "ma'am" in my life was trying to get customers' attention when working in the service industry during school.
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Old 05-22-2018, 10:01 PM
 
Location: Southwest Washington State
30,585 posts, read 24,998,404 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Panda panda View Post
I think if you call your elders Ma'am or Sir it shows some respect
I am going to admit that I think it sounds old fashioned. My kids turned out fine, thank you very much. They do say please and thank you. But I never expected them to call me ma’am.

But I raised my kids in the Midwest, not in the South.

And I never had trouble getting my kids to respect me.
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