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Old 04-14-2010, 03:04 PM
 
Location: Kansas
3,855 posts, read 13,239,753 times
Reputation: 1734

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Quote:
Originally Posted by jxndean View Post
...Moving out and being able to support themselves without help from their parents at all.

What age do you think most kids do this?

I think 22 is a good age to be independent and have your own pad. Your out of college and for the most part having an apartment is an ideal way to start off one's young adult life.

Any input is great.
Thx.

I think it's situation dependent. There are so many variables to consider.

A kid that's been through college and is coming out with virtually no money and into a crap economy with a bleak career outlook may not exactly be in a position to support themselves totally. If they've got no money or a good enough job to support their independence I don't know how you can justify giving them the boot. But I'd say that they better be working on a plan for becoming independent and not just sitting there playing the Wii all day long.

But lets say you had an 18 year old coming out of high school with no college or even tech-school asperations....and they barely make minimum wage at the local fast food joint. They're totally happy with having enough money to buy beer on the weekends and party it up with their burn-out friends. They don't pay rent or have any sort of financial responsibility. You could have that kid on your hands indefinitely if you were waiting for them to become financially independent. It's time to get them some brochures for the armed forces and have your local recruiters stop by and make some calls.
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Old 04-14-2010, 04:07 PM
 
758 posts, read 1,867,911 times
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I don't believe there is a clear cut answer either. I think most parents will know when the time is right. Hopefully the child makes that decision before the parents make it for them.

I wonder how many people on here who advocate making them support themselves at the age of 18, have actually kicked their child out at 18, or do they just have plans to do it at that age? Me thinks the latter and that will probably change when they actually reach that age.

My DH and I were out on our own at that age and it ain't easy plus we had our first child at 19 so doubly harder. We did make it and do quite well for ourselves now. We weren't kicked out, we just wanted to do it on our own (and do it together). We did have a little help from time to time from his parents.

So unless one of my children feel entitled to my help or think they can live off me forever, then I will help them whatever way I can. If that includes living with me for a while after graduating high school or even college then that's what we will do.
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Old 04-14-2010, 04:55 PM
 
4,796 posts, read 22,861,097 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ceece View Post
My son turned 18 the first month of his Senior year in high school. Immediately after high school there was no job waiting for him that paid enough for him to move out and support himself. So, IMO, this answer is bogus.
Of course a job isn't waiting for them. You have to go GET the job.
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Old 04-15-2010, 12:13 PM
 
Location: Hawaii
2,058 posts, read 3,297,384 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ceece View Post
My son turned 18 the first month of his Senior year in high school. Immediately after high school there was no job waiting for him that paid enough for him to move out and support himself. So, IMO, this answer is bogus.
was he planning on going to college?
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Old 04-15-2010, 12:32 PM
 
2,605 posts, read 4,680,223 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ceece View Post
My son turned 18 the first month of his Senior year in high school. Immediately after high school there was no job waiting for him that paid enough for him to move out and support himself. So, IMO, this answer is bogus.
And he can't work two jobs why?

Parents shouldn't have to throw their offspring out at 18; the offspring should be prepared and ready to move out and do so on their own at 18 or 19.
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Old 04-15-2010, 12:42 PM
 
Location: Alaska
5,356 posts, read 18,505,663 times
Reputation: 4071
An age range answer is more appropriate for this type of question. I'd say the youngest is age 18 and the oldest is 30, but there are circumstances that can go beyond 30. One circumstance would be an adult with a disability that makes living with parents the best alternative. Another circumstance might be returning to school. Currently, we have a son who came back to live with us because he is tried of roommates and renting, so he is saving up to buy a place. He is paying a nominal amount for board.
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Old 04-15-2010, 02:14 PM
 
Location: California
37,081 posts, read 42,050,241 times
Reputation: 34890
I love the "get a job" "get two jobs" answers. It's like nobody has paid attention to current events over the last 5 years. With a high school diploma pickins are slim, you can't support yourself unless you are extremely lucky and fall into something sweet with a friend or relative. I know someone who did this, who's uncle is paying him really good $$ to work for him, overpaying him actually. And his parents wonder why everyone can't do what he did. LOL.
For the record, my son as a part time job which he has been at since he was 16. He also goes to community college. Oh, and we live in one of the most expensive areas of the country too. See, one plan doesn't fit all.
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Old 04-15-2010, 02:29 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
24,012 posts, read 28,379,095 times
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I don't know that it is much different even with a college degree these days. People with degrees and experience are having a tough time. My DD has always worked but she had couldn't find a job last summer. The only kids who had summer jobs were kids who knew someone or had a family business. Been to a fast food place lately? I see plenty of adults working. It's a different ballgame than when we were that age.
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Old 04-15-2010, 05:21 PM
 
Location: Australia
1,492 posts, read 3,224,915 times
Reputation: 1723
I would hope that my kids have the self confience to step out and the feeling of love that when they wish to they know that they are welcome to come home.

Also,when I am old and frail, I hope that they will look after me rather than putting me in a nursing home.

So as to this idea of forcing them out. Its not for me.
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Old 04-15-2010, 09:35 PM
 
Location: here
24,873 posts, read 36,075,868 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NoExcuses View Post
And he can't work two jobs why?

Parents shouldn't have to throw their offspring out at 18; the offspring should be prepared and ready to move out and do so on their own at 18 or 19.
why? If the kid is going to college, you would make them work 2 jobs to pay their own way?
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