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I had my DD's name picked out for 10 years prior to her being born, if a friend happened to use the name first I would feel no obligation to ask that friend if they minded me calling my DD that particular name.
Do you know why they chose that name? Since it's not unusual or unique in any way my first guess would be that it had special meaning for them and your child having to have the same name wasn't going to dissuade them from using it.
My sister and her neighbor were pregnant the same time. My sister had a girl's name she loved but had another boy. The neighbor had a girl and used the name. My sister was quite upset for awhile.
names get used alot depending on popularity. How many Ashleys and Lindseys are there in the world? I wouldn't mind one bit. That's the chance you take if you chose a popular name.
The only problem I would see if siblings wanted to name their kids after a beloved parent or grandparent and it might cause friction if it wasn't worked out in advance.
That happened with my cousin. He had a child 10 years before me. He named the child after our grandfather, who also had my father's name. Grandfather was Sr and my father was Jr. When I had my son, I named him after my father even though I knew that my cousin's child had the same name. Afterall, I felt I had more rights to the name than him---it was my father's name. I understand they thought they were the only ones who had a chance to carry on the name---being my cousin was a male and I am a female. I didn't let the fact I'm a female keep me from naming my son after my father. I gave him my maiden name. As a result, there are two children with the EXACT same first and last names in my family, but my son is the only one with the proper middle name of my father and grandfather. He's the only one who truly has the name. It's not a big deal because we live in different states. I haven't seen my cousin since I was a teenager. If we had lived in the same city and socialized offen, I probably would have done the exact same thing though.
We didn't name our daughter the name I had always wanted for a little girl because our friends had a DD with that name. About a year after our daughter was born we ended up moving due to a job transfer and lost touch with this family. I have always sort of regretted not naming her what I wanted in the first place. I wouldn't worry about it too much.
The only problem I would see if siblings wanted to name their kids after a beloved parent or grandparent and it might cause friction if it wasn't worked out in advance.
That shouldn't matter either. Each has the right to pass a family name down.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes
That happened with my cousin. He had a child 10 years before me. He named the child after our grandfather, who also had my father's name. Grandfather was Sr and my father was Jr. When I had my son, I named him after my father even though I knew that my cousin's child had the same name. Afterall, I felt I had more rights to the name than him---it was my father's name.
So what. It was his grandfather's name so it's a FAMILY name.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes
I understand they thought they were the only ones who had a chance to carry on the name---being my cousin was a male and I am a female. I didn't let the fact I'm a female keep me from naming my son after my father. I gave him my maiden name. As a result, there are two children with the EXACT same first and last names in my family, but my son is the only one with the proper middle name of my father and grandfather. He's the only one who truly has the name.
That's pretty amazing. I guess you showed your cousin, huh? You were married at the time and gave your son your maiden name just to show your cousin that you were going to win in the name the baby contest? Middle name or not, the cousin has the legitimate name.
You don't have to show up someone else to make yours more deserved.
I have a niece with a name that is unique to her. If anyone else named their baby the same, we would know it is because they heard of my niece. Maybe she will start a trend, but she's 26 now and we have still never heard it again.
That shouldn't matter either. Each has the right to pass a family name down.
So what. It was his grandfather's name so it's a FAMILY name.That's pretty amazing. I guess you showed your cousin, huh? You were married at the time and gave your son your maiden name just to show your cousin that you were going to win in the name the baby contest? Middle name or not, the cousin has the legitimate name.
You don't have to show up someone else to make yours more deserved.
I didn't name my son that to show up my cousin. Heck, I haven't even talked to my cousin in 30 years. LOL
I was not married when I had my son. My father died while I was pregnant.
I didn't give him III. I gave him II, which is the appropriate designation when it's not a direct line.
I was merely sharing that I didn't feel that I shouldn't name my son after my father even though my cousin already used the name.
I think it depends on how close you are and the reason for the naming. Some names are very common and multiple families have them as "family" names. Think about Michael, how many of them are there?
My wife and I tried to give each of our kids a unique name and it's worked so far. The only issue we have had is that my wife had two girls names in mind for my first daughter. She shared both of the names with her younger sister. One of them was rather unique. My wife and I named our first daughter the less unique name and my sister-in-law promptly laid claim to the unique name for her daughter when/if she has one. Well, we had a second daughter and my SIL was very adamant that we shouldn't name her the name that she "claimed". We ended up picking a different name anyway as the unique one lost it's punch for us, but I did contemplate insisting on using the unique name just to **** off my SIL for being so petty.
The reason we chose unique names, was that I have dealt with the whole inherited name thing my whole life. I am the IV and it has been a bone of contention for sometime. My father was married before and has a son from that marriage. His ex-wife did not want to use the full name and made my dad's name my older brothers middle name. When my dad remarried and they had me they chose to name me the full name and make me the IV. This was against protocol as it was and my older brother has always had an issue with it. Fast forward and 13 years ago, my brother had his son (the giant wuss I posted about in the other thread). He wanted to name him the full name and make him the V. My parents argued with him not to as the name was my right to use if I wanted it. So, he used my dad's name for the middle name. Now, I had my son 5 years ago and decided not to carry on the tradition and gave him a unique name. Of course my brother is really pissed off about this as the name will now die. Of course, I find it ridiculous to keep naming people IV, V, VI, etc. It's not like we are English nobles or anything. Heck, most forms don't have a IV, let alone a V or VI.
Just curious to know your thoughts. A friend of mine just named his second son the same as my son's name. We've been friends for 15 years now. I know I don't have a copyright on my son's name, and it is not an unique name either.
But I just thought that typically you don't keep the same name as your friends' kids. Am I the only one who thinks this?
Regards,
K
If it's not a unique name why do you care? Your friend can name her child whatever she wants to name him.
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