[Mrs.Bewitched]

Whenever I look at these posts regarding searching for someone, I always have to sit back and think...how do we know that the people they are looking for want to be found by the person doing the looking? I mean, we are on the internet. We don't know each other. There could be a stalker, pyscho, murderer...and we could possibly be helping them to find someone that ran away, and they still want to abuse them.

Did anyone else consider this?

[Paula Lynn]

I totally agree and understand. There are so many means through the internet to find someone - but to post, I don't think that's a good idea. Because you never know .......

[sdmlions]

Could be anything really: Divorced partner looking for ex-lover, abusive parent looking for children, even simply people looking for people for the wrong reasons. If there is anything i've learned it's people will stoop to any levels to do what they have to do. All i'm saying is you can't be too careful...

[RockyMtnr]

Originally Posted by mrshvo

Whenever I look at these posts regarding searching for someone, I always have to sit back and think...how do we know that the people they are looking for want to be found by the person doing the looking? I mean, we are on the internet. We don't know each other. There could be a stalker, pyscho, murderer...and we could possibly be helping them to find someone that ran away, and they still want to abuse them.

Did anyone else consider this?

I find it easier and safer to 1)stick to specific categories such as kids looking for parents or their siblings 2)give them the basics of how to search 3)answer a few questions for them so that it they are sincere, they don't feel all alone and 4)set them free with the couple of tools you've given them.
It doesn't take all that long, if you're working searches on the net, to grasp more and more tools as you go. I'd guess that anybody could be almost a pro within a year if they are seriously searching for someone.
So, yes, limit your involvement and try to discern immediately just what type of searcher you're dealing with.

[Jim280]

I noticed some have posted, name, address and phone # of other people on here, not a good thing. Some people can take that info and do a lot with it. It can start the process of idenity theft.

[RockyMtnr]

Originally Posted by Jim280

I noticed some have posted, name, address and phone # of other people on here, not a good thing. Some people can take that info and do a lot with it. It can start the process of idenity theft.

Jim, you raise a good point. I have answered several searchers with step1 but with the few I have taken an active role with, I try to get them to e-mail me after a couple introductory PM's. For one thing, there's just not enough space on the PM page to cover info - for another, they need to be pulled off for privacy issues.
I often tell them to start more public posting - telling them to compose a brief message that will cover the basics, i.e, subject's recognizeable name, searcher's recognizeable name, state-info ... info that will almost ensure that the subject will recognize themselves as the subject. However, you help me realize that perhaps I should be composing the "search-paragraph" for them - and I'm not sure how good at that I would be - as, I really don't ask them for more info than I need to give them either their best lead or their first couple of steps - good point Jim. I must mention that PeopleSearch is not just on city-data, it's on many sites with many points of access. Perhaps PeopleSearch should enforce some guidelines or provide initial training or hire a few "search-angels" to do what we do by volunteerism.

[Paula Lynn]

I offered to help someone who was trying to locate a person. There are many free search engines out on the net - so a total stranger not only gives me the full name, date of birth & social security number. I told her NEVER to do that. Since then, I don't offer.

[RockyMtnr]

Originally Posted by Paula Lynn

I offered to help someone who was trying to locate a person. There are many free search engines out on the net - so a total stranger not only gives me the full name, date of birth & social security number. I told her NEVER to do that. Since then, I don't offer.

How lucky they were to have a SS#. Good for you telling her to never do that - but Paula, there are still people out there lost by adoptions and circumstances with legitimate holes in themselves needing to be filled.
I would ask you to continue helping an occasional poster who "strikes you right" - since you obviously know a couple of things about the search.
I ask this as a man who was stolen/adopted as a small child and didn't find his blood-family for over 50 years - even though I was a finder through most of my adult life!
All some of these folks need is to be pointed in the right direction. Once they get themselves onto a legitimate search-site, there may be others who can help get them farther along. Thanks, Rocky

[Paula Lynn]

Thanks, Rocky.

Paula

[thefer]

Originally Posted by Paula Lynn

I offered to help someone who was trying to locate a person. There are many free search engines out on the net - so a total stranger not only gives me the full name, date of birth & social security number. I told her NEVER to do that. Since then, I don't offer.

Paula,
Could you post some of the free search engines you know about. All the ones
I have tried have a fee tacked on to them. I went to High School with a person I'm looking for and he no longer lives in the same area.
Thanks,
Thefer