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I think for people there's fantasy and then there's reality. Some lean towards the fantasy (love is forever) and then there is the reality (love is not forever nowadays) side of it. The concept of reality tends to throw a wrench in the works of those which lean towards the fantasy. It's kind of like a brilliant idea being murdered a brutal set of facts.
I believe men and women who have something such as a house/property or an inheritance should protect themselves in todays society or its a deal breaker. My current gf owns her own home all I have is a lot of cash and investments. This I have acquired my wealth by the sweat of my brow alone. If I were to marry her she is not entitled to a SINGLE penny I have to a certain point. I am not entitled to any of her wealth either.
I would NOT marry again without a prenup. Period. The relationship will be ended if it becomes an issue. Period.
Yeah we are moving to a community property state (NV) from a non-community property state the day after our wedding hahaha just coincidence. But it doesn’t matter if a state is or isn’t community property, unless you don’t get a prenup. The status of a state is just the “default” absent another agreement. Any agreement between the parties before marriage, called the prenuptial agreement after all, supersedes state law / guidance on asset distribution. You’re just basically telling the courts, “disregard the default, we have our own agreement for dissolution,” and like any signed legal contract it is binding.
Sorry this was posted after mine, and you are wrong. Very very wrong. Some leading prenup attorneys have said in their decades doing this, they’ve never seen a single prenup overturned. It’s borderline impossible to challenge a prenup and any good lawyer can make it iron clad. It just cannot include anything about the kids (if there are any, so us not having kids ever makes the prenup safer too), it can’t include unreasonable demands (“she can’t ever look over 40!”), and it cannot be signed under duress and without counsel. Both people need their own lawyer to review otherwise it’s invalid. But done properly a prenup is a legally binding document between two people and the court as with all contract disputes defers to the language of the document and its intentions.
I could swear that many famous couples had a prenup and the next thing you know, they're going to court to fight and the one person actually ends up with something. It made no sense to me. What was the point of a prenup? But if you say so. Like I said, I have absolutely no knowledge about the subject.
What if they're not "leading prenup attorneys" or any "good" lawyer? lol
Usually custody is the main thing contested, that gets nasty, and not every prenup protects everything either. What if they had a prenup that just protected assets going into the marriage but said nothing about income after? Then you have a big fight on your hands if, say, she stayed home for 2 years with the kids and missed out on big movie roles and he made $20 million per year. Or the prenup said nothing about spousal support so she’s going after him for that, to maintain her “quality of life.” I’ve heard many times a loser guy ends up getting spousal support from his successful career woman wife, because there wasn’t any prenup. A good agreement should be thorough and specific about what the terms are and cannot be “unconscionable,” so in other words a situation that could leave one person needing state assistance.
In my case I didn’t have any issue saying, ok, I’ll make sure she has enough money to live on her own if anything goes bad, buy a decent car, etc. But not enough to never need to work again or something. For us the whole point was, “Let me pay all of our bills, you won’t be on the hook for anything, but you need to work for spending money and save your own cash on the side for peace of mind.” A person can build savings / wealth pretty fast when they pay no rent, no food, no cell phone, no insurance, etc. Even a modest income is all savings. So that was my way of trying to make a win-win but I didn’t want it to be where I do all of that, then if suddenly we weren’t feeling it anymore, she could on top of that take my money despite never having paid a dime to our expenses lol.
It's not just a touchy topic for women. It's just a controversial topic in general.
It gives off the vibe that one spouse might not trust the other spouse and they already have in mind that divorce is imminent.
There's another component. Usually the party who brings forth a prenup starts the relationship with more assets that they want to protect. This may carry the idea that "I have more things and money than you and I'm better, because of that, and I have to protect my stuff from you." There could be some superiority complex going on there and that's not nice, when you're supposed to be going into the relationship as equals.
Also, divorces can get pretty nasty with both sides trying to hurt one another. That's the second component.
I think people try to avoid confrontation at any cost, but even though I believe my fiancé and I will always be together - we are getting married after being together for 8 years - I still believe in logical risk avoidance and taking precautions. It’s not a lack of trust, it’s just common sense. Why does everyone have auto insurance but many people will never be in a serious car accident? Or home owners insurance when most of us won’t ever see our house burn down or flood? Yet 50%+ of marriages end in divorce and you’re not supposed to plan for a statistically likely outcome? That seems kinda of crazy.
But prenups can also be a nice way to avoid future confrontation because when you agree before the marriage - hopefully when you love each other and respect each other - that’s a much better time to make decisions on how things should go in the event of divorce rather than dealing with it when you potentially both hate each other! Ha ha.
Of course I’d get a prenup. I’m not getting married though. I have a quarter of a mil coming right now, no one I date even knows about it. Why would they? The funny thing is, the guy I lived with had his will made up at the Insistence of his 2 grown children, the WEEK before I moved in. I kinda got a chuckle about that, he definitely was well off, but not only had I never bragged about what I have, and will have, I thought it sent a message to him from his kids that I must be after his money. Ha, like that’s all he had and they weren’t aware of what else I would see in him?
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