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Old 10-26-2006, 07:36 AM
 
Location: Sonoran Desert
38,188 posts, read 49,657,569 times
Reputation: 27252

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I've been pondering how I went from being excited about leaving Phoenix for small town life in OK to re-evaluating the idea and now being close to abandoning it - all in a period of about a month. I've come to the conclusion that it was my posts on this forum that caused me to doubt. I came here looking for info on Oklahoma and that area of the midwest but got upset at the inaccurate Phoenix and Arizona bashing that was going on. And I began defending the place I thought I hated so much. In extolling the relative virtues of living in AZ, I began to think, "You know, it's not so bad here after all." Of course, the end of the summer heat and the beginining of the year's best weather helped too.

Maybe I should apply this approach to other areas of my life. Let's see, my wife is ....
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Old 10-26-2006, 02:57 PM
Cin
 
72 posts, read 303,709 times
Reputation: 34
ponderosa, i needed a good chuckle today and you gave it to me. You know I am on my way out of here ...mabey if my house can sell. I know that I can stay too and I have had years of hating it here and years when I have been like...you know this aint so bad. It really depends more on what is happening in your personal life ...not so much the state you live in.It is more about the attitude you choose to have no matter what right? When negative....things look pretty bad....but just flip it around and you can find the positives. I really feel there is both everywhere ...some places just might feel like a better fit in our heart.That being said...nothing wrong w/change or a following a dream ...but if we don't want that then we should be part of the positive in the world (no matter where we live)and make the best of our situation as there is already enough negativity around. Best to you...

Last edited by Cin; 10-26-2006 at 03:03 PM.. Reason: bad wording
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Old 10-26-2006, 09:23 PM
 
4,247 posts, read 10,318,725 times
Reputation: 1482
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ponderosa View Post
I've been pondering how I went from being excited about leaving Phoenix for small town life in OK to re-evaluating the idea and now being close to abandoning it - all in a period of about a month. I've come to the conclusion that it was my posts on this forum that caused me to doubt. I came here looking for info on Oklahoma and that area of the midwest but got upset at the inaccurate Phoenix and Arizona bashing that was going on. And I began defending the place I thought I hated so much. In extolling the relative virtues of living in AZ, I began to think, "You know, it's not so bad here after all." Of course, the end of the summer heat and the beginining of the year's best weather helped too.

Maybe I should apply this approach to other areas of my life. Let's see, my wife is ....
Well, then I guess it didn't destroy your dream, because you're still here, and maybe you like the here where you are, which is all the better...
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Old 10-26-2006, 09:27 PM
 
4,247 posts, read 10,318,725 times
Reputation: 1482
BTW, if an Internet forum can destroy your dream, you need to re-examine the dream.
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Old 10-27-2006, 09:35 AM
 
Location: San Diego
1 posts, read 2,340 times
Reputation: 13
Default Dreams are not ruined by outsiders

The riginal poster did not have a dream. The original poster had an escape wish. The poster wanted to GET AWAY from something rather than to GO TO something (an objective). A dream can be a very powerful human attribute (animals can't do what we do). Gates dreamed of a computer on every desk (an objective). Trump dreamed of owning Manhattan properties (objectives). The dream is the beginning visualization of something in the future. The objective (how to make the dream a reality) must be precisely defined and it must be affirmative (to do something is a given tiem frame with X resources -- people, money, things time). The dream becomes a reality by DOING what it takes to accomplish it. (do something = present tense; NOW). People(the main resource) include YOU (work hard), helpers, advisors, gate keepers, enablers. Money: loans and investors (both easy to get). Up to $10 million with almost no effort. Time -- you only have so much, don't waste it. Things -- exurban land, ranches, businesses, machines ... use them to produce results. Excuses -- lame escapes for WHY I AM NOT DOING MY DREAM. In short .. f you rreally have a dream then get your butt in gear. Otherwise go back to the bar and order a beer and pipe down.
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Old 10-27-2006, 09:54 AM
 
Location: NY
4 posts, read 7,024 times
Reputation: 10
Good post seeknfind, while my wife and I have been trying to get out of NY for a few years now (her parents and money are pretty much all that's keeping us here), I find that I am lacking motivation some days. I am thinking that it is partially due to psychologically unhealthy living arrangements (namely sharing a house with her parents), I just need some incentive to get me out of this cycle and make me get off my butt and into gear. I am hoping that reading some good posts like yours can help me snap out of it and get going.
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Old 10-27-2006, 10:16 AM
 
25,408 posts, read 47,610,909 times
Reputation: 29828
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ponderosa View Post
.....Maybe I should apply this approach to other areas of my life. Let's see, my wife is ....
Hey Ponderosa: Send pix of wife.
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Old 10-27-2006, 10:21 AM
Cin
 
72 posts, read 303,709 times
Reputation: 34
Default dreams

Hey all, I think dreams are good and healthy....just want to bring up we live in the real world and we can't always have our dream and that we do need to be considerate of others involved in our life. What I am saying is even w/ a dream there are things that could stop us from fullfilling them. An example for me would be...I do have a 86 yr old grandma that relys on me...things need to be considered....that is where the word selfless comes from and it is not an easy thing. I think ponderosa did have a dream(idea)and was researching it to see if it was realistic(smart move)and started to see his own reality right? By the way..if he turned his heart around towards phoenix area that is wonderful...I like to fight for the underdog too. A great example of a dream for me would be...I always dreamed I would marry a wonderful guy that would never hurt me and whose parents would love me and I will raise my kids w/cousins and grandparents around etc. etc....well nice dream...but other people in our life can affect our dreams. or just plain have their own..or kill them sometimes...but we just find a new dream to keep motivated eh? Oh yeah what is wrong w/...when we hit the lottery hon we will get that kitchen remodel I saw in that magazine?(non realistic...but fun to play around w/anyways)..Just thought I would lighten things up a tad...gotta go...have a dream to plan.(I mean make into my reality!)Have a great weekend all
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Old 10-27-2006, 11:38 AM
 
84 posts, read 147,489 times
Reputation: 54
Default That is for sure

Quote:
Originally Posted by movin'on View Post
BTW, if an Internet forum can destroy your dream, you need to re-examine the dream.
Nothing people say could influence an idea I may have. You have to wonder about that. It was meant to be facetious I'm sure because no one would let people that have been here 35 years, and know some things in detail, and have a long term perspective gained from all sorts of inconveniences and ho hum stuff in Arizona affect them.

Advancing age, life experiences here, people, the ability to go from Point A to Point B without packing a lunch and carrying a water supply for traffic, all influence the changes in a person's attitude about a place.
Just like Ashfork. They are rude up there. Wonder why? Is it because they don't want their town taken over? People are weird. When I was in construction in the Seventies people would ask me where I was from and how long I lived here. They wanted to give the work to people that lived here year around. For some reason, when I looked at them "just having moved here", I got a vague feeling of "How hypocritical can you be"? Here you are just moved here from out of state and you not wanting someone just moved here from out of state to do your work????? Maybe a guy just moved here from out of state was also in construction and wanted work also. Although it may seem logical to some(don't know why), it sounded really, really bizarre to me!!!
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Old 10-27-2006, 12:52 PM
 
Location: Sonoran Desert
38,188 posts, read 49,657,569 times
Reputation: 27252
Quote:
Originally Posted by humble101 View Post
Nothing people say could influence an idea I may have. You have to wonder about that. It was meant to be facetious I'm sure because no one would let people that have been here 35 years, and know some things in detail, and have a long term perspective gained from all sorts of inconveniences and ho hum stuff in Arizona affect them.

Advancing age, life experiences here, people, the ability to go from Point A to Point B without packing a lunch and carrying a water supply for traffic, all influence the changes in a person's attitude about a place.
Just like Ashfork. They are rude up there. Wonder why? Is it because they don't want their town taken over? People are weird. When I was in construction in the Seventies people would ask me where I was from and how long I lived here. They wanted to give the work to people that lived here year around. For some reason, when I looked at them "just having moved here", I got a vague feeling of "How hypocritical can you be"? Here you are just moved here from out of state and you not wanting someone just moved here from out of state to do your work????? Maybe a guy just moved here from out of state was also in construction and wanted work also. Although it may seem logical to some(don't know why), it sounded really, really bizarre to me!!!
Well, yes, the post was tongue-in-cheek. And I was trying to convey that in defending the Phoenix area from the detractors, I was coming to believe that maybe it is not so bad here after all. That said, it certainly is not the place it was way back when I came here as a kid fresh out the Army to go to college. In just about every way imaginable, it is a worse place to live now. It's easy to dwell on that after all this time here and pack my bags. But like Cin pointed out earlier, it's not just about me. Shoot, I'd be happy in a cabin on a lake in Minnesota with no neighbors but the deer and bears. But I've got to consider other people in my life and, for them, maybe Phoenix is a better choice than a lakefront lot in a little town in Oklahoma. The hand-wringing goes on .
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