For the good of the forum shouldn't we be more positive? (Phoenix: buyer, live)

[RenW]

I really appreciate everyone responding. Many of your comments have been thought provoking. There are a couple of things I'd like to clarify.

I wouldn't want or expect people to be dishonest about how they feel about this area. I really don't mind people being critical of the area when they present solid facts or explanations. What does bother me is when people are overly critical without giving facts or distort the truth to try to make their point. As well, when people equate their opinion and preferences to being facts. Whether it is intentional or not sometimes it comes across that some users believe that if they hate x, y, or z everyone should.

Some people seem to have nothing good at all to say about the area and that really isn't fair. Even in the areas in which I overall didn't like there were still things that I could honestly see good qualities. I do think it is important to the integrity of information here that we give a broad view to others especially those who are looking to move to the area. I do believe as well that if our opinions are on the extreme whether positive or negative and we know it that we divulge that information. It is good for people to know where we are coming from and what may be influencing our opinions.

Rhaethe gave a great example of a productive comment and a much less productive comment with the same information. A lot of times how we say things make a big impact. If we are participating here to add to the conversation, people will listen more if we take a more moderate, balanced approach.

I do know that poor behavior is a by product of human kind and more specifically the internet, but it also isn't in my nature to keep quiet when I see something troubling or see how something could be improved. My original post came off of me reading a string of really critical, exaggerated posts. Instead of calling people out specifically, which I didn't think would be productive, I started this thread. Thank you all for reading and participating!

[lewdog_5]

Originally Posted by azriverfan.

But then you have to question why they don't move. Talk is cheap. Actions speak louder than words. There are a lot of curmudgeons who rant about Phoenix but it's funny how none of them can live in any other city but Phoenix.

In my experience these people are usually working low paying jobs and would probably hate most places they live but blame their circumstances on Phoenix itself. I think many financially can't see how they could afford to get out. Others I think just feel the stress of change and a move and never make it.

[azriverfan.]

Originally Posted by lewdog_5

In my experience these people are usually working low paying jobs and would probably hate most places they live but blame their circumstances on Phoenix itself. I think many financially can't see how they could afford to get out. Others I think just feel the stress of change and a move and never make it.

Those are weak excuses. They can move. They are just choosing not to. They may not like Phoenix but don't dislike it enough to move. They can't admit that because it takes away from their argument. Again, actions speak louder than words. People who truly dislike this place will move. This is nothing more than people venting with no sincerity behind their words. Actions speak louder than words. There are a lot of talkers but the person who truly hates this place would have been out of this state yesterday. I've been on this forum since 2008 and these same haters who have been saying they will move are still here. Do a search. Saying you hate this place for the last 6-7 years while you're still here pretty much destroys your credibility. That says a lot about Phoenix when it's biggest haters are still living here and won't move.

[AlohaFriday]

Originally Posted by azriverfan.

It's also the way our forum is moderated. The Phoenix CD forum has traditionally taken a more open approach and welcomed a variety of opinions. Unfortunately, that can also draw a lot of negative opinions. I've been on other city forums on CD and their mods do not allow dissenting opinions or negative posts about their city. They will immediately delete threads and refer you to old threads. This can provide a skewed view of why certain forums don't have many negative threads. Also, a lot of forums have members that will out you immediately for posting a negative opinion. People are hesitant to post a negative thread on other forums knowing the backlash they will receive. Being that Phoenix is such a transient city, many of our members don't feel the same sense of loyalty and don't mind a dissenting opinion or negative opinion.



But then you have to question why they don't move. Talk is cheap. Actions speak louder than words. There are a lot of curmudgeons who rant about Phoenix but it's funny how none of them can live in any other city but Phoenix.

This forum has people who immediately call you out for posting a "negative" opinion. I don't understand the point. What threads don't allow dissenting opinions? I can't quite wrap my head around that one.

Maricopa County's Population Turnover Rates Among Highest in the Nation | Phoenix New Times

People are constantly moving into and out of Phoenix, so many people do actually move.

Quite frankly, I don't understand the uproar over discussing drawbacks of the area. Some people don't like it here and offer their perspectives so other people can make informed decisions. So much aggression gets stirred up. It's full of judgement and hate —*although not the OP's post, which I found very respectful — and seems disproportionate to the initial comments.

The tone on Phoenix's forum, in particular, is always aggressive and the underlying theme is always that if you don't like it here, it's some kind of failure on your part. You don't make enough money, or you don't get out enough, or you're just negative and hate life.

What if the real picture was more nuanced? People just can't be put into boxes, nor can cities. People can read the posts and figure out for themselves what to believe.

At the end of the day, I don't see any threads with the level of hostility and aggression that's present on this thread. I don't understand it, and that gives me pause much more than reading the opinion of someone I don't agree with.

People say Arizona is live and let live, yet this thread does nothing but cast judgement on those who don't like it here and choose to express their opinions in the best way they know how.

[yukon]

Originally Posted by Potential_Landlord

The average local Republican primary voter seems to be 100% motivated by negativity only. Otherwise we would not be bombarded with sleazy negativity-loaded commercials around the clock on TV when one Republican candidate fights with and slanders the other. No wonder this negativity swaps over into our Phoenix board. There are a lot of them around here.

Hmmn. I'm a Democrat. I may have to move to PHX after all just to help out the numbers.

[Jukesgrrl]

Originally Posted by ElleTea

I've been all over this metro. I don't just sit in my apartment in my corner of the city waiting for things to come to me. To assume that is what people do is ridiculous. I am sure some do, but don't assume that someone is too timid or stupid to know they need to get OUT to find things.

And I am still bored but not for lack of trying. Seriously.

Well, again, as I said at the end of my post, it's incumbent upon you to tell us WHAT IT IS you're looking for here that you're not finding. Seriously, I want to know. Where did you live before and what did you do there that held your interest?

[magnum0417]

Originally Posted by Jukesgrrl

Well, again, as I said at the end of my post, it's incumbent upon you to tell us WHAT IT IS you're looking for here that you're not finding. Seriously, I want to know. Where did you live before and what did you do there that held your interest?

Reading between the lines of her posts, she loves the 115's but doesn't like nature and finds the amenities of Phoenix boring. [personal attack] I personally would prefer your neck of the woods to PHX but as you know, salary for the same position is less in Tucson and many choose PHX not because it's the best place in AZ (not by a longshot), but for income. I personally love AZ for its nature and climate diversity but find the soulless chains that encompass a good part of The Valley uninspiring. As a nature lover, I explore the beauty of the state every weekend I can. The mountains in your neck of the woods are better (Love Windy Pt on Catalina HWY) as well as the 5-10 degree temperature difference creating more diversity as well as more authentic SW culture. I love ABQ and Tucson is definitely ABQ's twin culturally and with the mountains.

[ElleTea]

Originally Posted by Jukesgrrl

Well, again, as I said at the end of my post, it's incumbent upon you to tell us WHAT IT IS you're looking for here that you're not finding. Seriously, I want to know. Where did you live before and what did you do there that held your interest?

I did answer that in another thread.

I live here and I am dealing with it. I LOVE these 115+ temps, so I will just learn to deal with the boredom in exchange for not being cold.

[ElleTea]

Originally Posted by magnum0417

Reading between the lines of her posts, she loves the 115's but doesn't like nature and finds the amenities of Phoenix boring.

Yes, that is true about me. What is there to read between the lines? [I'm] stating my opinion [orphaned]

I'm not outdoorsy. I don't care to go hiking (though I have been doing it), rock climbing, etc. How you react is how to react. Me living my life and commenting here about it is just that. You are making it all about you for some reason.

My opinions and my experiences are MINE. I don't understand why so many on the internet take it so personally. Seriously.
[orphaned]

have a nice day!

[observer53]

Originally Posted by Jukesgrrl

Well, again, as I said at the end of my post, it's incumbent upon you to tell us WHAT IT IS you're looking for here that you're not finding. Seriously, I want to know. Where did you live before and what did you do there that held your interest?

Originally Posted by ElleTea

I did answer that in another thread.

I live here and I am dealing with it. I LOVE these 115+ temps, so I will just learn to deal with the boredom in exchange for not being cold.

She did post a list of the things she liked to do in Iowa. And, if she had posted that list before she moved here, and asked if she would find those things in the Phoenix area, the answer would have been, pretty much, no, you won't. But, she didn't, and now she's here. So, not being cold better be enough. Hope we don't have another winter like two years ago.


Other city forums get the same negativity. Phoenix is not alone in that regard. No place is for everyone. I don't pretend to know the percentages, but for most people, I think, the move works out. Do they stay forever? Some do, some don't. Life sometimes forces us to make other plans. Some people move here for the wrong reasons, and when it doesn't work out, blame the place instead of whatever really went wrong. Some do their research and think they will like it here, but it doesn't turn out that way. As some wise person here on C-D has said many times, whereever you go, you take yourself with you. And, sometimes it's hard to predict what living in a place will be like. As for people who were born here, and want to move on, I think most do. Some of the rest, who can't leave for one reason or another (and there ARE those who really can't, not just those who won't) stay here and vent. Especially in the summer.