low-key gay couple moving to PHX (Phoenix, Mesa: fit in, credit, neighborhood)

[aaron303]

Hi there,

My husband and I are moving to Phoenix soon, and I'll be working at ASU Polytechnic in southeast Mesa. It's a great job offer that I couldn't turn down (great salary, benefits), but since we're two gay guys we're concerned about where to live. Everyone seems to suggest central Phoenix, but that commute would be ridiculously long and brutal! I've looked into Tempe... but north Tempe near the University still seems like a long commute, so we're considering north and west Chandler (either near the Chandler Mall or Dobson Rd. corridor).

We are quiet and keep to ourselves for the most part (no loud crazy parties, no political agenda pushing, no public affection, etc.) and would prefer something more suburban but not socially conservative and religious. Most of the online forums seem to suggest that Mesa and Gilbert are like the deep South, and at our age (early 40s), we are frankly not interested in dealing with that sort of hassle.

Are the northern and western parts of Chandler gay-tolerant? We just want to be left alone and don't want mean-spirited people bothering us or vandalizing our property, etc. Also, we do not have children and are not planning on adopting.

Also, does anyone have any other suggestions other than north/west Chandler? I wish the job was on the main Tempe campus or even the west campus, but I guess you can't always get everything!

Thanks.

[DetroitN8V]

I find it a little sad that someone has to ask where they’ll be able to live without meanness and vandalism just because of who they’re married to. I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised that you likely won’t have to worry about any of that nonsense anywhere here. Mesa and Gilbert have lots of Mormons in places (not that they’re violent), but it’s hardly anything like the Bible Belt. Gilbert has gotten much more diverse lately with the vibrancy of their downtown. I think Chandler and Gilbert are both good choices. Both areas seem to have lots of young families that have moved from elsewhere and are just trying to fit in as well. Tempe is a great place to live as is Scottsdale, depending on the commute.

You haven’t mentioned your budget, but the more affluent/educated areas will likely have people with more open-minded worldviews. I’d probably stick to the more urban/suburban areas for that reason.

Good luck and welcome!

[Pink Jazz]

West Chandler is probably the most gay tolerant part of Chandler, while far East Chandler is more of an extension of Gilbert. North Chandler seems to be a mixed bag.

[KurtAZ]

OP...you are referring to areas around my neighborhood...most people aren't going to bat an eye.

[asufan]

I live in South Chandler and have a couple neighbors that are gay couples and they both love the area and don't appear to be discriminated against, although I've never asked. Neither of them have children but I know the female couple likes living in neighborhood with children through conversation (and they go all out on Halloween and sit out with neighbors by the firepit and are friends with everyone around here). If you don't mind a bunch of kids, South Chandler would be fine. Stay close to the Santan freeway and the commute wouldn't be too bad at all. This is the higher income part of Chandler and in my experience higher income areas equal higher education levels and less ignorance.

[LBTRS]

If there is a place you're going to have trouble I don't know where it would be. I'm as conservative as the come and would be happy to have you as neighbors if you respect the neighborhood and your neighbors like the rest of us do. That is my only criteria and the only criteria anyone I know uses.

Being conservative doesn't mean we won't accept you and let you live as you choose to live. To each his/her own and that is how most people are in the area.

[wase4711]

Originally Posted by LBTRS

If there is a place you're going to have trouble I don't know where it would be. I'm as conservative as the come and would be happy to have you as neighbors if you respect the neighborhood and your neighbors like the rest of us do. That is my only criteria and the only criteria anyone I know uses.

Being conservative doesn't mean we won't accept you and let you live as you choose to live. To each his/her own and that is how most people are in the area.

THIS, EXACTLY!

This isnt the deep south, and people only care that you are good neighbors, not who you lay down at night with...much more tolerant than so many other parts of the USA...

[JGMotorsport64]

Most people recommend Central Phoenix because there’s an unexpectedly large concentration of LBGTQ folks that way. But this isn’t the kind of town where people are concerned with your lifestyle. You should be fine anywhere, but the West Chandler recommendation is credited as it’s a younger and more liberal part of the East Valley

[KurtAZ]

Originally Posted by LBTRS

If there is a place you're going to have trouble I don't know where it would be. I'm as conservative as the come and would be happy to have you as neighbors if you respect the neighborhood and your neighbors like the rest of us do. That is my only criteria and the only criteria anyone I know uses.

Being conservative doesn't mean we won't accept you and let you live as you choose to live. To each his/her own and that is how most people are in the area.

Not to say you won't run into the occasional asshat...but on the whole, most people won't care. People tend to be judged by how they treat others out here. If you are rude, you will receive rudeness. If you are kind, responsible and affable...expect the same in return. All this junk about AZ being a racist or bigoted hole is nonsense and doesn't reflect the citizenry at all. Just some of our fringe lawmakers.

[DetroitN8V]

Originally Posted by KurtAZ

Not to say you won't run into the occasional asshat...but on the whole, most people won't care. People tend to be judged by how they treat others out here. If you are rude, you will receive rudeness. If you are kind, responsible and affable...expect the same in return. All this junk about AZ being a racist or bigoted hole is nonsense and doesn't reflect the citizenry at all. Just some of our fringe lawmakers.

In fairness, our lunatic lawmakers don't get there without citizens' support. There is still plenty of support for vehemently anti-LGBT politicians/candidates. It's more like the citizens won't be outright mean to an individual, but will support the political ideology of someone who will.