Early 30's single male and frustrated... (Pittsburgh, Penn Hills: living, moving to, suburbs)

[WILWRadio]

To the OP. You may have to change your strategy a bit at least as far as the age thing is concerned. As you get older it does get far more difficult to meet single women near your own age because most are attached. This will start to change once you reach your mid to late 40's and beyond once divorces and even death have impacted a marriage. The following may help you to relate to what I am saying.

I went through the same thing at your age as well. And I used to have a hangup about age and to date I've never gone out with a lady that is either two years younger or three years older than myself. This has turned out to be a big mistake. Currently I am 45 though I look more like I am in my mid 30's. Over the last ten years or so I've noted a lot of younger gals in their late teens to late 20's (single) seem to take a liking to me especially those in New England, NY, PA, OH and IN. Unfortunately I never attempted to go out with any of them because I was so concerned about being considerably older than they are. After getting a "lecture" if you will from a friend I've decided that this was a mistake not to go out with someone that is interested in me (and I in her) simply because they might be a lot younger. That is going to change and now I am open to the idea of dating someone younger. I doubt I'd go out with someone that is 19 years old but if a young lady of 21 to 30 years old is interested then when I am in a position to date again I will probably go for it. Currently I live in Kansas City but I am planning to relocate back to the Northeast in the near future and once I get settled into a new home I will be ready to date again. And since the pickings of available, let alone compatible women in my own age bracket is not all that great, I will probably be dating someone much younger.

If worse comes to worse there is always a mail order bride service. Plenty of Asian and Russian gals want to marry American's in order to have a better life. I've heard many men go this route and wind up happy and in decent stable relationships with their mail order brides. Just something to consider...

[stasia]

PUMP (Pittsburgh Urban Magnet Project) and the affiliated PSL (Pittsburgh Sports League)

My brother plays in a number of PSL leagues (softball, dodgeball, and even cornhole). He's in his late 20s and most of the people on his and other teams are in their late 20s to early 40s.

[Goodjules]

Originally Posted by fleetiebelle

I'm single and in my early 30s as well, and I think where people go wrong is that they're looking for one place to find people, as if there's a secret club with a secret handshake. The only think I can tell you is to do things that you like, and you'll meet people with similar interests. Look into Meetup and Meetin and PUMP, or check the groups and activities sections of Craigslist, and check the events listings in the City Paper and This is Happening. Volunteer somewhere. You shouldn't go about it like you're trolling for women, but the more people you meet, the better your odds are.

I totally agree. When I was in my 20s and 30s I took lots of night classes in subjects that interested me. If the subject was something traditionally "female" (cooking, knitting, jewelry-making, aerobics) there were usually no men in the class. I always thought that if I were a guy looking to meet women, I'd take this type of class. I also think volunteering for something you believe in is a good way to meet like-minded people. Again, I've found that when I volunteer, the women usually outnumber the men.

If you know/meet women who are married or in a relationship ask them to introduce you to their single friends. Older women might have single daughters your age. Or, maybe you could try a cougar?

Throw a party and tell all your friends to bring a few friends. You'll have fun and meet new people.

Get busy doing things you like. It seems that the best way to meet someone is when you're not looking. If your life is full and interesting it will make you happy and more attractive to women.

I work at home too and recently joined a local business group. I did it for my business, but I realized at the last meeting that it's also a way to meet new people. Professional organizations, chambers of commerce, guilds... are all good options.

Good luck!

[30somethings]

I may try a different area in Pittsburgh for a little while (I'm in Washington County now). Does anyone have any recommendations?

Lance

[BrianTH]

Originally Posted by 30somethings

I may try a different area in Pittsburgh for a little while (I'm in Washington County now). Does anyone have any recommendations?

Lance

You'll find a relatively large number of people around your age in the university and hospital areas in the East End.

But I have to say I don't think this is really a question of circumstances. Once people are out of the school years, it becomes much, much harder to meet single people. And indeed I suspect even if you are meeting attractive people your age somewhere, most of them will not be single.

Which is why I think all the advice above is correct: get busy with activities you enjoy, think about using meetup services on the Internet, and most of all network (meaning make a lot of friends who might also be friends with the sort of person you would like to date, and then tell those friends you are looking for someone to date and ask them to help). In fact that last is how I met my wife (she was a coworker of a girlfriend of a friend of mine, and I had specifically asked the intermediary if she knew anyone she could set me up with).

[Bong477]

Move to shadyside, possibly squirrel hill or southside. its hard to meet people if you live in a rural area, work at home, don't go to bars, etc. you have to do some things that put you in social situations and you have to be able to take a few chances and risk rejection. i know a lot of single late 20's/early 30's ladies in pittsburgh.

[loose cannon]

Originally Posted by CortlandGirl79

I do go to Cleveland for Indians games, concerts, etc., but i plan on staying in the Youngstown area if i can find a job. If not i'm looking to stay in Northeast Ohio or Western Pa.

30somethings, sorry i hijacked your thread.

Youngstown is the home of Ron Jaworski. Why has he not done anything for your town?


Anyway, Im 40 and am going through a similar situation. That's why Im probably moving to Austin TX.

[namelessinpitt]

Originally Posted by 30somethings

No problem, I've gotten some good info so far from the suggestions. Thanks for all of the replies, and if anyone has more I'm all ears.

Lance

Try Southside. Try it, you'll like it! LOLOL

[CortlandGirl79]

Originally Posted by loose cannon

Youngstown is the home of Ron Jaworski. Why has he not done anything for your town?


Anyway, Im 40 and am going through a similar situation. That's why Im probably moving to Austin TX.

I don't think he's from Youngstown, just went to Youngstown State i think.............Ron Jaworski - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

[MissShona]

I can understand your frustrations; but I still thing the dating scene here is better than it was in South Florida (where such a large percentage of people are super shallow).

I've discovered two free dating sites where I met some guys (just not the right guys); http://www.okcupid.com and http://www.plentyoffish.com . Try to not get down about it and have fun with it :-)