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Proof that what you said was acknowledged. Yes my daughter is living proof I'm right, compared to her friends with over protective parents never taking the time to teach them about the real world.
Being sarcastic, nope. I know that couple. They raise their daughters is a bubble.
I didn't see the sarcastic slap of the head at the end of this sentence.
"Let's turn off the tv. Let's throw away mags. It's society's fault. It's entertainment. It's music. Really."
I had slammed you thinking it was your actual stance on it.
I thought you were promoting a sheltered life.
See reply withing the quote, in bold.
I think we agree.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mercury Cougar It's not the fault of MTV if your kid see something there that you don't like. It's your fault for not putting parental controls on your television to filter out programs you don't think are appropriate.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BentBow
That is the exact over protection that causes this crap, I talked about in my last post on this thread.
Filter out programs, so you the parent don't have to parent. Parenting is not about, not letting them see something in life. Parenting is talking about what they see and explain the consequences and how it can be viewed as good and bad.
That is the copout that is bad parenting!!
Parenting is ALL OF THE ABOVE! Filter out SOME of the programs, not all are appropriate!. Parenting is protecting them from SOME things are are not age appropriate for them to see/hear/discuss, and DISCUSS those things that are appropriate.
WHAT THE HELL is a 13 year old doing with a boyfriend? That's the first problem! At thirteen, 99% of children are not emotionally equipped to handle the complexities of relationships. Thus, bad decisions get made and lead to this tragedy. I raised 2 children as a single dad, and NO, at 13 my kids didn't date, and didn't go to school dances, etc, because at that age, it's not appropriate based on maturity levels.
It's even MORE apparent when you factor in the responses of the OTHER kids that age. I mean come on, if they were 18, do you think they would be throwing around those terms, and becoming physically violent and being as nasty online. (BY THE WAY where is the parental oversight?. Such as using the internet, posting things, etc).
Parenting is using all available methods to protect your childen from what isn't appropriate for them at the age they are at, and dealing with those things that are appropriate, and yes it's a find line to walk.
What's going on today that kids are killing themselves over being bullied? Are they just not prepared for the realities of life?
Oh for heavens sake--does everything with you people have to go back to some type of "liberal conspiracy" where parents don't raise their kids to be tough enough? Have you ever thought--just maybe--it might have to do more with the rise in social media use?
If someone wanted to pick on a kid in the past, their opportunities were limited to when they could actually SEE you, like in the hallways at school. They could spread gossip about you, but it was limited to the school or their immediate social group, and showing "proof" was a matter of having an actual photograph in your hands. Now that anyone can post a pic from a cell phone, or say something slanderous on facebook, it's 24/7, graphic, no holds barred ability to humiliate another person in front of the entire planet. Not many people, especially young people, can stand up to that type of public ridicule.
The factors that kept bullying within limits in the past are gone. An example is taking pictures of yourself in a compromising situation. In the past, photos had to go to the lab at the local drug store for the developer to see--there were safety checks for embarrassment in the system. Now you can click a picture of yourself on a cell phone, and electronically send it to your boyfriend in seconds. The problem is that kids DON'T THINK about the potential consequences of their actions. Once that photo is available through electronic media, you're putting complete trust in the person you send it to. If they want to be a jerk, they can share it with the world. We had a girl at our local High School who sent a half dressed picture of herself to a boy she was involved with, and the entire school had it on their cell phones within a day. It's called sexting, and it's a big problem among kids.
Parents don't need to toughen their kids up to accept that bullying is part of the world--they need to teach their kids that dumb choices can have far ranging consequences. We closely monitor internet use with our younger kids, but we give our older kids a little more freedom because we are certain they understand the potential consequences of dumb choices, they've proved themselves to be very level headed and responsible kids. THAT's what every parent needs to do.
Oh for heavens sake--does everything with you people have to go back to some type of "liberal conspiracy" where parents don't raise their kids to be tough enough? Have you ever thought--just maybe--it might have to do more with the rise in social media use?
If someone wanted to pick on a kid in the past, their opportunities were limited to when they could actually SEE you, like in the hallways at school. They could spread gossip about you, but it was limited to the school or their immediate social group, and showing "proof" was a matter of having an actual photograph in your hands. Now that anyone can post a pic from a cell phone, or say something slanderous on facebook, it's 24/7, graphic, no holds barred ability to humiliate another person in front of the entire planet. Not many people, especially young people, can stand up to that type of public ridicule.
The factors that kept bullying within limits in the past are gone. An example is taking pictures of yourself in a compromising situation. In the past, photos had to go to the lab at the local drug store for the developer to see--there were safety checks for embarrassment in the system. Now you can click a picture of yourself on a cell phone, and electronically send it to your boyfriend in seconds. The problem is that kids DON'T THINK about the potential consequences of their actions. Once that photo is available through electronic media, you're putting complete trust in the person you send it to. If they want to be a jerk, they can share it with the world. We had a girl at our local High School who sent a half dressed picture of herself to a boy she was involved with, and the entire school had it on their cell phones within a day. It's called sexting, and it's a big problem among kids.
Parents don't need to toughen their kids up to accept that bullying is part of the world--they need to teach their kids that dumb choices can have far ranging consequences. We closely monitor internet use with our younger kids, but we give our older kids a little more freedom because we are certain they understand the potential consequences of dumb choices, they've proved themselves to be very level headed and responsible kids. THAT's what every parent needs to do.
Good post, well said.
This is bullying 2010 style. Bullying that occurred in the 80's or even 90's was not accompanied by this level of technology. Most teens have phones capable of taking pictures and video, and capabilities of posting on a social networking site withing minutes. People can reminisce all they like about old-school bullying, this is not the same animal.
This is bullying 2010 style. Bullying that occurred in the 80's or even 90's was not accompanied by this level of technology. Most teens have phones capable of taking pictures and video, and capabilities of posting on a social networking site withing minutes. People can reminisce all they like about old-school bullying, this is not the same animal.
WHY do most teens have a phone capable of doing all these things? Tell me, what does a 11/12/13 year old need with a cell phone with the exception of contact with family. Doesn't need internet/texting/facebook/camera/etc/etc ad nauseum.
WHY do most teens have a phone capable of doing all these things? Tell me, what does a 11/12/13 year old need with a cell phone with the exception of contact with family. Doesn't need internet/texting/facebook/camera/etc/etc ad nauseum.
I have no idea why they have them or why they need them. I have a 10 year-old who does not have a cell phone, and will not have one in the near future, and certainly not one capable of email and internet access. We have a disposable cell phone that is shared by the kids in 3 familes, total 9 kids. If anyone is going on a sleep-over, etc, they have use of the phone. It can make and receive calls from certain phones only. The phone belongs to me, and that's the end of it. I will tell you most of the children in my son's grade (4th) have their own cell phones, some have iPhones. Very, very stupid idea.
WHY do most teens have a phone capable of doing all these things? Tell me, what does a 11/12/13 year old need with a cell phone with the exception of contact with family. Doesn't need internet/texting/facebook/camera/etc/etc ad nauseum.
My Jr. High and up aged kids have phones for our convenience. I have preteens and teens--I don't want them standing alone, outside the school, in the dark because I didn't know the bus was back from an event, or that practice got out early, and my oldest son won't be driving independently until next spring. Texting automatically comes as part of our family cell package, and just about every cell phone you can purchase now comes with a built in camera. We haven't allowed any of the kids to go the Droid route with cell phone connection to the internet.
I don't think the problem is the technology itself--I think it's teaching your children the appropriate use of the technology. My youngest (11) has a facebook account--he uses it to keep in touch with his cousins, aunts and uncles, and to play games like farmville with his friends. We have his password, check his account daily, and restrict him from adding anyone as a "friend" that we don't approve first. My older children are also restricted from adding anyone they don't know. We have a nanny block on our PCS to restrict inappropriate content. We talk to them regularly about the consequences of using poor judgement on the internet. My kids have shown really good judgement, but it's because we taught them to use it to begin with. I think it's entirely a parenting thing--not a problem with technology itself.
My Jr. High and up aged kids have phones for our convenience. I have preteens and teens--I don't want them standing alone, outside the school, in the dark because I didn't know the bus was back from an event, or that practice got out early, and my oldest son won't be driving independently until next spring. Texting automatically comes as part of our family cell package, and just about every cell phone you can purchase now comes with a built in camera. We haven't allowed any of the kids to go the Droid route with cell phone connection to the internet.
I don't think the problem is the technology itself--I think it's teaching your children the appropriate use of the technology. My youngest (11) has a facebook account--he uses it to keep in touch with his cousins, aunts and uncles, and to play games like farmville with his friends. We have his password, check his account daily, and restrict him from adding anyone as a "friend" that we don't approve first. My older children are also restricted from adding anyone they don't know. We have a nanny block on our PCS to restrict inappropriate content. We talk to them regularly about the consequences of using poor judgement on the internet. My kids have shown really good judgement, but it's because we taught them to use it to begin with. I think it's entirely a parenting thing--not a problem with technology.
You make my point beautifully. The cell phone is provided for contact with family. BTW a nanny block on your PC can be gotten around in seconds. I am a computer specialist, and my kids were/are very good with computers, and in fact have had broadband internet since the 90's. Use a firewall router with built in blocking capability so it's filtered before even coming in. That was they cannot get around nanny software on the computer, (again, not a problem to get around, for most computer savvy kids). A good example of a firewall router is the Netgear WGU624
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All is correct -
That was a journey, huh! 
