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Fear is good.. Let's look at that in a different light. Till you learned that respecting your parents was the right thing to do, most kids I grew up with, respected their parents, because if they didn't, their father would spin their heads right off their shoulders.
So, the correct behavior started as a learned behavior, because you feared the punishment, and the person about to do so.. ONCE you grew up a bit, you understood why, and the learned behavior, now the norm, was understood.
Bolded text - Actually, there is a way.
1. Have school disciplinary issues increased in a greater proportion than the increase in students.
The answer would be yes, based on conversations with MANY people in the educational field.
Why? Several reasons, Parent apathy, lack of respect, and again, children never learned to fear the consequences of their actions. Because they don't care what the consequences are there is far more disciplinary issues in school.
So there was a
that came out yesterday about a teenager getting whoopped by his uncle for acting like a thug on Facebook. I feel a little embarrassed for the teen but I think his uncle did the right thing and, eventhough Im not a parent, I think it should be used in some occasions (not all of em tho)
So what do you think? Do you consider whipping children as discipline or child-abuse?
mas23
Abuse, plain and simple...There are better ways than whipping.
Fear is good.. Let's look at that in a different light. Till you learned that respecting your parents was the right thing to do, most kids I grew up with, respected their parents, because if they didn't, their father would spin their heads right off their shoulders.
So, the correct behavior started as a learned behavior, because you feared the punishment, and the person about to do so.. ONCE you grew up a bit, you understood why, and the learned behavior, now the norm, was understood.
Bolded text - Actually, there is a way.
1. Have school disciplinary issues increased in a greater proportion than the increase in students.
The answer would be yes, based on conversations with MANY people in the educational field.
Why? Several reasons, Parent apathy, lack of respect, and again, children never learned to fear the consequences of their actions. Because they don't care what the consequences are there is far more disciplinary issues in school.
Frankly, this is nonsense.
Fear is not good. Fear does not instill respect. Good parents do not need fear and violence to instill respect in their kids. Neither do good teachers. Hitting kids is the last resort of incompetent parents.
Fear is good.. Let's look at that in a different light. Till you learned that respecting your parents was the right thing to do, most kids I grew up with, respected their parents, because if they didn't, their father would spin their heads right off their shoulders.
So, the correct behavior started as a learned behavior, because you feared the punishment, and the person about to do so.. ONCE you grew up a bit, you understood why, and the learned behavior, now the norm, was understood.
Agreed. There was a time that that was considered part of standard home training--respect for and deference to authority.
I will say that I am all about people being allowed to instill discipline in the way that they see fit...as long as it doesnt harm the child. My husband was spanked and he is fine..I was not spanked and I am fine. But hair pulling from the temple really made me stop and go wow..I read that to my husband and his mouth dropped open and he said wow too.
I cant see how hair pulling is an acceptable form of discipline...in any way..and ironic as many children pull each other's hair when they are young and you have to make them stop..good luck explained to a child why you pull their hair as discipline but they cant pull susie's hair!
Agreed. There was a time that that was considered part of standard home training--respect for and deference to authority.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Darkatt
Fear is good.. Let's look at that in a different light. Till you learned that respecting your parents was the right thing to do, most kids I grew up with, respected their parents, because if they didn't, their father would spin their heads right off their shoulders.
So, the correct behavior started as a learned behavior, because you feared the punishment, and the person about to do so.. ONCE you grew up a bit, you understood why, and the learned behavior, now the norm, was understood.
Bolded text - Actually, there is a way.
1. Have school disciplinary issues increased in a greater proportion than the increase in students.
The answer would be yes, based on conversations with MANY people in the educational field.
Why? Several reasons, Parent apathy, lack of respect, and again, children never learned to fear the consequences of their actions. Because they don't care what the consequences are there is far more disciplinary issues in school.
I think respect for and deference to authority is hugely important for children to learn. I don't know that spanking is the most effective way to achieve that. However, as I stated earlier, I'm not opposed to an open handed swat on the bottom used as a strategy, not out of parental anger. It's just not the technique I find most useful. I am thoroughly against anything more physical than that, not just for potential abuse issues but also because the human brain ceases to process information when it becomes emotionally overwhelmed, so I don't find it to be the most effective way to teach kids. Do I think having fear of consequences of their actions is important? Absolutely. Do I think having fear of the parent is the best way to achieve this? I don't.
Re: bolded text - I am not disagreeing with you that school disciplinary issues have increased. I was disagreeing that anyone can ascertain that the reason for the increase is due to removing spanking from the schools or home. I agree with all of the reasons you stated, all of which could potentially explain the school discipline issues increasing.
I would also add that I see a lot of parents allowing their kids to "escape" the consequences of their actions (e.g., intervening at school, not following through on punishments, etc.) - I doubt that's helping the discipline issue, either. ETA: I don't spank but you'd better believe that if my son does something wrong there will be consequences (both real-world and imposed by mom and dad) and I'm not going to "save" him from them.
Last edited by eastwesteastagain; 02-05-2011 at 05:16 PM..
I believe you should have to take a test before becoming a parent. Kids that are hit and screamed at become less productive adults. Parents who are educated in parenting skills know how to discipline their kids without using a belt. I know there are people on this forum that say "I got it and I turned out ok." Sorry, but that was 30 plus years ago and that old way of doing things just doesn't fly anymore. Those were simpler things for simpler times.
Depends on how it's done. It's not cut and dried and a little physical pain isn't going to ruin anyone.
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