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Exactly. If your teenager gets hit on by another homo kid, the only reasonable thing to do is uproot your child and move him/her to another school. My kid's going on her 6th different high school for this reason. Why can't these homo kids stop recruiting and just crawl back into the closet?
Basically, you're saying that if I oppose harassment then I hate gay people. Please make a real argument or take that liberal bull**** elsewhere.
Should this guy let his daughter get harassed just because the harasser is in one of your protected groups? Yes or no?
Exactly. If your teenager gets hit on by another homo kid, the only reasonable thing to do is uproot your child and move him/her to another school. My kid's going on her 6th different high school for this reason. Why can't these homo kids stop recruiting and just crawl back into the closet?
I am quite liberal when it comes to sexuality and I don't agree with this statement at all.
Getting hit on = flirting, asking out on a date, writing love notes, etc. This is not simply a girl with a crush on another girl.
Having a good friend fall for you = common teenage situation. That is the stuff of many a story of unrequited love involving (usually) awkward confessions, uncomfortable rejections, and friendships too awkward to maintain in the aftermath. Lots of crying in your pillow and night listening to sad love songs by Taylor Swift follows. LOL. This isn't really that situtation either.
On the other hand, I would imagine if I had, say, a 13 year old son who was good friends with a girl his age who told him he was her only friend in the world, confessed to multiple serious problems like cutting and sexual abuse, and wielded those things like a hammer to keep him feeling too guilty to ever push her away... I would be concerned about that. Then on top of that the girl confesses her love for him, emotionally breaks down over his rejection while placing him in the position where he feels he is the only person who can comfort her, even as it makes him uncomfortable... I would be concerned about that. Then she proceeds to talk to him about her sexual exploits and my son feels powerless to ask her to stop even though he doesn't want to hear it (he's only 13, lots of 13 year olds are not comfortable with these subjects).. well, I would be concerned about that too.
I'm not saying the girl is evil, she needs help. But a 13 year old is too young to deal with that level of drama. I wouldn't have changed schools though. And I don't know what the principal was supposed to do about it.
I am quite liberal when it comes to sexuality and I don't agree with this statement at all.
Getting hit on = flirting, asking out on a date, writing love notes, etc. This is not simply a girl with a crush on another girl.
Having a good friend fall for you = common teenage situation. That is the stuff of many a story of unrequited love involving (usually) awkward confessions, uncomfortable rejections, and friendships too awkward to maintain in the aftermath. Lots of crying in your pillow and night listening to sad love songs by Taylor Swift follows. LOL. This isn't really that situtation either.
On the other hand, I would imagine if I had, say, a 13 year old son who was good friends with a girl his age who told him he was her only friend in the world, confessed to multiple serious problems like cutting and sexual abuse, and wielded those things like a hammer to keep him feeling too guilty to ever push her away... I would be concerned about that. Then on top of that the girl confesses her love for him, emotionally breaks down over his rejection while placing him in the position where he feels he is the only person who can comfort her, even as it makes him uncomfortable... I would be concerned about that. Then she proceeds to talk to him about her sexual exploits and my son feels powerless to ask her to stop even though he doesn't want to hear it (he's only 13, lots of 13 year olds are not comfortable with these subjects).. well, I would be concerned about that too.
I'm not saying the girl is evil, she needs help. But a 13 year old is too young to deal with that level of drama. I wouldn't have changed schools though. And I don't know what the principal was supposed to do about it.
I agree 100% with you. First off, I don't believe this poster's story one bit. But lets assume it's true. If there truly was unwanted harassment(including sexual harassment), the first call should have been to the friend's parents - not the principal. If the issue couldn't be resolved family to family, then I would have suggested to my daughter not to interact with her "friend" - to end the friendship. If the lesbian cutter refused to let go and the harassment continued, I'd then involve the school and if, as the poster indicates, the school is unwilling to step in, I'd make it a police matter (although if it had gotten that serious, I can't imagine any school not stepping in). It seems ridiculous overkill to uproot your family and take your daughters away from their friend groups to get away from this one gay harasser.
That said, in the story given to us, I didn't see anything really bad from the 13 year old lesbian cutter. What was the harassment again? - telling details of her bad childhood and crying at being rejected as a potential girlfriend. Is that really "gay harassment" reaching the level of needing to flee the school for safer grounds? Making this a "gay" issue is nothing more than a anti-gay, homophobic attack thread.
Quote:
Originally Posted by noexcuseforignorance Of course not, had the kid been straight then the OP's homophobia wouldnt' have kicked in and he would have just said on there's a 13 yo acting like one. Thus, the OP's need to out the girl to the staff at her school and make passive aggressive posts on the internet wouldn't exist.
Yes I'm sure if it was a straight boy he would have the let the kid harass his daughter. You just proved his point. Since it's a gay girl, you label him as a bigot. Ridiculous. You've been ranting through this entire thread.
Quote:
Originally Posted by noexcuseforignorance Teaching one's child to be a bigot isn't something that should be applauded. Being a manipulative, overprotective parent always ends up with bad results. Here's what I remember from high school. The girls who were always most of out control were the ones rebelling against overly strict, manipulative nitwits of parents.
The OP just created the easiest way for his children to rebel. Guess what the best way is to **** off a homophobic overbearing father. Karma always comes back on people.
There's a difference between what you are doing vs. an overbearing father taking his kids to a difference school essentially because they have a gay friend.
You're right. Parents should back off and let their children get harassed. Wouldn't want to act like a parent or anything.
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Exactly right, Sam - SIMPLE 'down to earth' spot-on post ....noting the absurd, disgusting attitude of these 'homo' defensive bunch.
That said, in the story given to us, I didn't see anything really bad from the 13 year old lesbian cutter. What was the harassment again? - telling details of her bad childhood and crying at being rejected as a potential girlfriend. Is that really "gay harassment" reaching the level of needing to flee the school for safer grounds?
I don't disagree. For me this is a case of taking the OP at his word. The facts of the situation could be read with either way. The girl could be emotionally manipulative or she could be just 13 and hormonal. The daughter could really feel uncomfortable and pressured to go along or she could have just mumbled a few words in response to her father's inquiries while a panicked daddy filled in the blanks. The only way to really tell is to know the young ladies involved in real life. I'm just not ruling out the idea that the girl could be everything he says she is, because to me there is enough there where it could be true.
I don't disagree. For me this is a case of taking the OP at his word. The facts of the situation could be read with either way. The girl could be emotionally manipulative or she could be just 13 and hormonal. The daughter could really feel uncomfortable and pressured to go along or she could have just mumbled a few words in response to her father's inquiries while a panicked daddy filled in the blanks. The only way to really tell is to know the young ladies involved in real life. I'm just not ruling out the idea that the girl could be everything he says she is, because to me there is enough there where it could be true.
I think the OP's point though is that he thinks there is a double standard and that if he even raises the issue he will be labeled homophobic. The latter has been demonstrated throughout this thread.
I think the OP's point though is that he thinks there is a double standard and that if he even raises the issue he will be labeled homophobic. The latter has been demonstrated throughout this thread.
No doubt about that. There IS a hypocritical 'Double Standard' with this issue. Just as there is with the 'race' issue.
I think the OP's point though is that he thinks there is a double standard and that if he even raises the issue he will be labeled homophobic. The latter has been demonstrated throughout this thread.
I know that is his point, actually, I addressed that in my first post. The problem with that to me is that the premise is false. The principal could not stop a male student from telling his female good friend... key word here is friend, as in a close relationship entered into willingly by the girl... from talking to his female friend about his sex life. The principal could only intervene if the girl had asked him to stop and he refused, then engaged in harassing behaviors. None of that happened here, at least not the way the story was told by the OP. So there is no double standard at work. At worst the friend is emotionally manipulative, but the school administration cannot protect students against that. No one can.
He's going to get called homophobic IMO because, as the story reads, it is ambiguous as to whether the friend really did anything that rises to the level of harassment or manipulation. The way this is typed, it is not clear if he is really just bothered because a needy girl hit on his daughter. The girl could be a nightmare or maybe she isn't, we don't know. I'm taking him at his word but that doesn't mean everyone will. Using this as an example of "gay harassment" is justifiably iffy IMO.
I know that is his point, actually, I addressed that in my first post. The problem with that to me is that the premise is false. The principal could not stop a male student from telling his female good friend... key word here is friend, as in a close relationship entered into willingly by the girl... from talking to his female friend about his sex life. The principal could only intervene if the girl had asked him to stop and he refused, then engaged in harassing behaviors. None of that happened here, at least not the way the story was told by the OP. So there is no double standard at work. At worst the friend is emotionally manipulative, but the school administration cannot protect students against that. No one can.
Maybe there's nothing specific they could do, but his point remains valid as it pertains to um, let's call it public opinion (on this thread for example it has been shown that people are very quick to jump to conclusions of bigotry). It's possible the school wouldn't have stepped in anyway, but at the same time it's also possible there is a double standard at work. No one on this forum knows better than him what's going on.
We've all seen political correctness get in the way of truth at some point in time.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tinawina
He's going to get called homophobic IMO because, as the story reads, it is ambiguous as to whether the friend really did anything that rises to the level of harassment or manipulation. The way this is typed, it is not clear if he is really just bothered because a needy girl hit on his daughter. The girl could be a nightmare or maybe she isn't, we don't know. I'm taking him at his word but that doesn't mean everyone will. Using this as an example of "gay harassment" is justifiably iffy IMO.
Maybe so, no way for your or I to tell what is going on in this situation. I'm only addressing his point about double standards.
It's ridiculous. The OP's point has been proven time and time again. He CANNOT say a word about anything without being called homophobic.
Yup.
What are people not understanding? The OP is upset b/c some chick is giving his daughter a hard time about not liking her back. She was not crying and upset b/c she's a cutter, b/c she was abused, b/c she was adopted, any other inane excuse you want to come up with. If a boy was doing that, you can be sure a chaperone would have put a stop to it. And then the principal got defensive b/c the girl is gay and he felt the need to defend her and tell him, THE FATHER, that the behavior was appropriate, even though the OP's daughter felt uncomfortable. Again, it would have been a non-issue if it was a boy doing that.
And all of you people coming on here and calling the OP a bigot or giving him a hard time oughta be ashamed of yourselves. I don't care if you think he titled the thread wrong, what he had to handle was awkward. He did the right thing in talking to his daughter about boundaries and it seems she heeded his advice. The problem is with the other girl not understanding boundaries (it goes beyond friendship when one starts having a physical attraction to another, so don't use that "well she's confiding in a friend" excuse) and the principal not taking action b/c the situation is a gay one instead of a straight one.
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