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Is it maybe actually BECAUSE this society seems so obsessed with homosexuality? Like gay marriage, for instance, shouldn't that mainly apply to gay couples? Why do a lot of straights seem apparently interested in homosexuality? Like men having the lesbian fetish, for instance.
Yet men seem as paranoid as ever about being labelled 'gay.' Even if you are mistaken as gay, if it's tolerated, why would it be so terrible? A couple of people have thought I might've been gay (only a couple though). Honestly I didn't care.
Like men aren't allowed to have much physical contact with one another - even in more homophobic nations than Pakistan men hold hands and stuff, what gives? Not that I'm pining to hold my friend's hand or anything. Or what about short shorts or something, if people are so tolerant, why are so many people making fun of these guys for looking or acting 'gay'? It's so ridiculous. Since when did men become uncomfortable kissing each other on the cheek? Maybe the fact it's seen as sexual is because if a man kissed another man it would lead to more. I find it profoundly odd that it's only acceptable for women.
It's like everyone is being suspected of being gay these days. If a women watches lesbian porn it's normal, but if a man does even once he's gay? Why the annoying double standard? Sexuality isn't as fixed in stone anyway, people are still obsessed with labels and whatnot.
Without even READING the whole thread, which I'll go back and do after I've answered this amazingly OBVIOUS and silly question, I'll say this:
1. Those who are afraid of it in a homophobic manner are insecure in who they are and most often fairly young, actually worrying about that kind of thing.
2. Those who are not homophobic but find that someone actually judges something about them to be "gay", typically NOT via insult but second- or third-hand (BEEN through this one, so speaking from experience) are either A) living in a backwater part of the country where ignorance howls aloud at the moon nightly, or B) at first curious WHY anyone would think that when they're not, and if it happens or they hear it enough, irritated by it. It's like being called repeatedly a thing which you are NOT, and it has nothing to do with societal tolerance and a lot more to do with people in general getting the wrong idea about who you actually are.
The first time I heard this stuff I had a long-distance girlfriend I cared about so I was minding my own business. I was in the best shape of my life, working in a warehouse in Hicksville, USA, and beyond that I was precisely the same guy I'd always been.
After months of the LDR being rocky, one night I decided to ask out a cute little gal from work for a simple movie-and-dinner date, and proceeded to do so. Didn't have plans to hit on her, but was sick of being left alone with an uncommunicative partner whose intent was no longer clear and who seemed continuously distant, and wanted some company -- and if things went that way, so be it, but I didn't plan to push it.
Anyway, I asked her out and she looked around in half-fear, half-surprise, and agreed. It felt.... strange.
I picked her up that weekend and we went out. There was a bit of an age difference, so I expected conversation to falter; but the backwoods nature of where I was really showed up, and so I quickly put anything involving physical contact OUT of the picture. I'm NOT the kind of guy who can just hop into bed with anyone, and I have to feel comfortable with them on a mental level in order to even consider the physical stuff.
At dinner as we sat and talked a bit, she suddenly blurted out in her accented English "I's real su-prised win yew ay-yusked me out. We jest all figgered you's GAY!"
I spluttered through my drink and, after clearing my throat asked "Good God, WHY would you think that?"
And she said -- no kidding -- this (I'll leave out the accented effect for the sake of brevity):
"Well, you're smart and you're real funny. You use them big words all the time. You're clean and you got real nice manners. We just figgered you was GAY."
On other occasions it's turned out I was "gay" because of things like the fact that I cook more than meal-in-a-bag; or because I speak of moderately worldly things; or because I decorated my own place in furniture and decor which didn't look like several large animals and birds simply found a place to die; or because I don't hit on everything that waddles down the pike.
And like it or not, homosexuality being more accepted by society or not, for a guy who is NOT homosexual to be CONSIDERED homosexual has a lot less to do with the "Oh NOES dey think I is be the GAYS" and a whole lot more to do with wondering why the hell people would choose what should be perfectly GOOD qualities and making a blatantly wrong assumption based on those.
It's like being called repeatedly a thing which you are NOT, and it has nothing to do with societal tolerance and a lot more to do with people in general getting the wrong idea about who you actually are.
The first time I heard this stuff I had a long-distance girlfriend I cared about so I was minding my own business. I was in the best shape of my life, working in a warehouse in Hicksville, USA, and beyond that I was precisely the same guy I'd always been.
After months of the LDR being rocky, one night I decided to ask out a cute little gal from work for a simple movie-and-dinner date, and proceeded to do so. Didn't have plans to hit on her, but was sick of being left alone with an uncommunicative partner whose intent was no longer clear and who seemed continuously distant, and wanted some company -- and if things went that way, so be it, but I didn't plan to push it.
Anyway, I asked her out and she looked around in half-fear, half-surprise, and agreed. It felt.... strange.
I picked her up that weekend and we went out. There was a bit of an age difference, so I expected conversation to falter; but the backwoods nature of where I was really showed up, and so I quickly put anything involving physical contact OUT of the picture. I'm NOT the kind of guy who can just hop into bed with anyone, and I have to feel comfortable with them on a mental level in order to even consider the physical stuff.
At dinner as we sat and talked a bit, she suddenly blurted out in her accented English "I's real su-prised win yew ay-yusked me out. We jest all figgered you's GAY!"
I spluttered through my drink and, after clearing my throat asked "Good God, WHY would you think that?"
And she said -- no kidding -- this (I'll leave out the accented effect for the sake of brevity):
"Well, you're smart and you're real funny. You use them big words all the time. You're clean and you got real nice manners. We just figgered you was GAY."
On other occasions it's turned out I was "gay" because of things like the fact that I cook more than meal-in-a-bag; or because I speak of moderately worldly things; or because I decorated my own place in furniture and decor which didn't look like several large animals and birds simply found a place to die; or because I don't hit on everything that waddles down the pike.
And like it or not, homosexuality being more accepted by society or not, for a guy who is NOT homosexual to be CONSIDERED homosexual has a lot less to do with the "Oh NOES dey think I is be the GAYS" and a whole lot more to do with wondering why the hell people would choose what should be perfectly GOOD qualities and making a blatantly wrong assumption based on those.
I can't believe it took this long for this obvious answer to come out. Then again, intelligence doesn't seem to be high around here.
There's nothing worse than hearing in any case, "I thought you were _ because you _".
Of course it's plenty of women. As stated, men only have a slightly greater tendency towards homophobia. The point I'm making is that it's nonsense to charge women for this when it's societal.
I don't think anyone should require validation. People should, at the very least, my their own frigging business. But, as this forum aptly shows that's nigh impossible. People can be cruel, insensitive, and just plain moronic. Even in this thread the word homo has been used. Attempting to blame stupidity on one gender over the other just adds to it.
What's wrong with the word homo? How is that an insensitive word? Lol
What's wrong with the word homo? How is that an insensitive word? Lol
How about this, tho, for a little experiment since you live in Key West. When October arrives attend Fantasy Fest and wear a big sign that state's "you're a homo" and wait to see how it's received. Be sure to report back.
Exactly, and he knows it yet intentionally uses it.
He also has a track record as long as my arm, of derogatory and negative posts against gays. Several of these I recalled and 15 seconds of searching I found many more.
Quote:
Originally Posted by 90sman
Adultery and homosexual acts should be criminal.
Quote:
Originally Posted by 90sman
I'd be concerned as well if I thought one of my children were a homo.
Quote:
Originally Posted by 90sman
Marriage is between a man and a woman. Not two men or two women. Homosexuality is a sin and allowing homo marriage is like saying homosexuality is okay and that it's okay to live a life of sin....
Quote:
Originally Posted by 90sman
Marriage is between one man and one woman and that's the way God intended it to be. Homosexuality is a very strange, bizarre and abnormal thing. Plus, the Bible tells us that it's a detestable sin and an abomination. People weren't designed or intended to be with their genders. If God had intended us to be homos, He would have created all of us as one single gender.
I'm sure there are more...
If it were just one post, taken out of context, it might be no big deal, although its not anyone's favorite word. Taken in the context of the above posts, its VERY offensive.
I've been considering starting a thread about why people have the urge to control others. Either they want to prevent homosexuals from marrying, they don't think men and women should be friends, they don't think people should cohabitate, or whatever it is. There is a subset on this forum (and beyond) that have a desire to control what other folks do and I don't understand why. What difference does it make? How will any of it change the happenings of this Sunday for those individuals.
I think a good 80% of this is conditioned. Men in other cultures are also very touchy feely, and women in some (Scandinavia) are not.
True. There are societies in which STRAIGHT men do kiss each other on the cheek and lock arms.
This isn't accepted in American society.
Either way, I wouldn't want to kiss, hold hands or lock arms with another guy.
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