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Old 01-03-2008, 10:49 PM
 
22 posts, read 17,250 times
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thousands. all i'm sayin is does a kid really want gay parents
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Old 01-03-2008, 10:57 PM
 
Location: In the Redwoods
30,286 posts, read 51,765,919 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lolagranola View Post
No I don't, but I know that it can't be a fraction of how many need families.

How many kill themselves who have straight parents?
Too many, whatever the number... ironically, one of the leading causes of teen suicide is confusion & fear over sexual identity. If only the OTHER people would stop judging and teasing, this would all be a dead issue. It's not being gay that makes them kill themselves, it's the fear over how society and their family/friends will treat them - how sad is that?

All children will deal with hardships, but love at home is what gets us through... and if that love comes from 2 moms or 2 dads, I don't think it matters in the long-run. Besides, kids today are much cooler about this stuff, especially in California (where the OP and myself live). I work with kids and teens every day, and they constantly surprise me with their maturity about issues like this.
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Old 01-03-2008, 11:01 PM
 
Location: In the Redwoods
30,286 posts, read 51,765,919 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by breezy194 View Post
thousands. all i'm sayin is does a kid really want gay parents
I don't think they care, as long as both are loving. My childhood friend I mentioned earlier LOVES her moms, and I guarantee she wouldn't wish one of them away! Her situation is even more telling, since her mom conceived her with a man (ex-husband) who abandoned them... her "other mom" came into the picture shortly afterward, and helped to raise a wonderful child. I bet if given a choice, she'd still pick the woman over her biological father who ran off with his tail between his legs - and probably would have been an awful father if he'd stayed.
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Old 01-03-2008, 11:11 PM
 
Location: In the Redwoods
30,286 posts, read 51,765,919 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by breezy194 View Post
well after hearing what yall had to say, I kind of on the same page with my mom now.She always told me, " Its better for a kid to have to gay loving parents than two straight parents who hate each other."
But I just dont know if the foster kids get to choose their parents or vice versa. I mean i've been teased in school, but seeing where i grew up, I handled it violently. But I guess I just got caught up in all the gay vs straight talk myself.
I'm glad you're listening to our thoughts, and re-considering the issue. Foster kids probably don't get to choose their parents, though I assume adoptive parents have a say... and while they don't get a whole lot of opportunities, the child could probably refuse an adoption on personal grounds. But would you rather live in foster care forever, or with two men/women who will love and care for you? I know people who grew up in the foster system, and it's nothing pretty.
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Old 01-04-2008, 12:17 AM
 
Location: Charlotte, NC (in my mind)
7,943 posts, read 17,195,553 times
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While I support gay civil unions and am against anti-gay discrimination, I have a bit harder time saying that there is no difference between gay parents and the nuclear family that includes a mother and a father. Ideally a child should have both a male and a female role model to learn from. The nuclear family does work best. Unfortunately in our society that is not how it is. Gay parents will probably have a similar effect on a child as a single parent. While gay adoption is definately not ideal, there isn't much more damage it can do than what is already being done by broken homes.

Myself, I wouldn't want gay parents. I like having a mother and a father and couldn't imagine it any other way. It might be different to a child who has never experienced the traditional nuclear family.

Are gay parents harmful to children? Probably not. Are they ideal? Absolutely not.
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Old 01-04-2008, 12:22 AM
 
Location: In the Redwoods
30,286 posts, read 51,765,919 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bchris02 View Post
While I support gay civil unions and am against anti-gay discrimination, I have a bit harder time saying that there is no difference between gay parents and the nuclear family that includes a mother and a father. Ideally a child should have both a male and a female role model to learn from. The nuclear family does work best. Unfortunately in our society that is not how it is. Gay parents will probably have a similar effect on a child as a single parent. While gay adoption is definately not ideal, there isn't much more damage it can do than what is already being done by broken homes.

Myself, I wouldn't want gay parents. I like having a mother and a father and couldn't imagine it any other way. It might be different to a child who has never experienced the traditional nuclear family.

Are gay parents harmful to children? Probably not. Are they ideal? Absolutely not.
Of course it doesn't seem ideal, and often is not... but it's better than some alternatives, especially for a child in the foster system. And while you can't imagine that kind of life, a kid who's raised that way would have a hard time imagining your life! They can still be perfectly happy, secure, successful, and well-adjusted, as I've seen with my own eyes - so I have absolutely NO reason to be "against" gays raising children.

P.S. I'm going to move this to the Politics & Other Controversies forum, since it's not a religious discussion... unless you have a problem with that, in which case please let me know!
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Old 01-04-2008, 01:03 AM
 
Location: Boise
4,426 posts, read 5,902,476 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by breezy194 View Post
Well i was having a conversation with my cousins about gay marrige. I told them that gay people should be able to get married. But when it came to them being able to adopt I aint no what to say. I mean I was basically raised by my mom, no dad, i also had my aunt and grandma too. But its different when it comes to 2 parents of the same sex. I just dont really approve of it.
I don't approve of children not having any home.. or spending years in and orphanage... a home's a home... if the home can provide the same support and stability as any other home.. then it should be available.... I know of many gay men that can out domesticate any woman out there.... and I know of many lesbians that can out man many men out there... so having masculine and feminine role models is hardly a scape goat... a gay household is very similar to any other household.. its a matter of whether we want to sit and focus on whats between everyone's legs... because that's the only issue I see being so different...
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Old 01-04-2008, 01:26 AM
 
Location: Fort Worth, Texas
10,757 posts, read 35,348,636 times
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I have been a single Mom from the beginning to my daughter who is about to turn 11. It was not my choice but her Father's. I can tell you that the job would have been alot easier if I had a companion, man or woman. My child would have been better off.

I can't understand how anyone can say its OK for gay people to marry but they can't have children or adopt children.
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Old 01-04-2008, 01:37 AM
 
1,149 posts, read 5,623,946 times
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From a biological point of view it is in the interest of the child to have a father and mother.
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Old 01-04-2008, 03:49 AM
 
Location: In the Redwoods
30,286 posts, read 51,765,919 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by internat View Post
From a biological point of view it is in the interest of the child to have a father and mother.
A child who's in need of adoption doesn't have EITHER... so 2 parents are quite a bonus, no matter what their genders are.
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