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So I have some personal experience here. Me and my ex wife split up. I ended up physically having the kids, she argued for and got a temporary custody order. I ended up going to court when served, bringing the kids with. she won that round, kids went with her. Later I won in court in the end, and raised the kids.
In your world I should have just ran off with the kids, and not gone to jail.
We have over 300 million people in the US, we have a imperfect justice system, there will be unfair results. Its a sucky system, and the best in the world.
Do you actually have any better ideas, or is this just a whine about it?
When she knows that many before her lied and got away ,she will continue to lie
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We are arguing hypotheticals based on personal experience, the one time i saw a father fight for his kids and lose, it was because the mother had a better job(salary of 50,000 a year) and a confirmed place of residence while the father was currently looking for an apartment and was making a little over 12 dollars an hour.
Even with that money she will still take payments from the man for child support.
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so in other words, you have no example to actually discuss, just hypotheticals.
Facts are not hypothesis and not all facts are put in writing. Anyway, you want data? check this
As a general rule, if the father does not have custody, it's because he is not fit to raise the child, so we can assume this isn't a common problem.
Does the farther technically have a right to see hid kid. I'd say so, but he's obviously done something to make the court think that's not a good idea. That being the case, it's best he keep his distance until the court changes their mind.
And I am aware that there are times when the court wrongfully denies custody to the father. The courts typically favor the mother in these situations.
So while the above circumstances are obviously unfortunate, we'd need more info to determine rather or not this is a serious problem that desperately needs attention.
??? I think traditional custom has been for courts to award custody to the mother unless the mother is found to be unfit. i.e. the father's qualifications (or lack thereof) might not even be relevant.
While joint custody is more common today, mere poverty can exclude a father from custody. Are you saying that poverty makes a father an unfit parent?
Not a single one of your links shows an example of the hypothetical you put forth in your previous comment about a women with 4 or 5 kids that she can not take care of and winning a custody case over a capable father.
Did you forget what you were supposed to be proving ???
We have over 300 million people in the US, we have a imperfect justice system, there will be unfair results. Its a sucky system, and the best in the world.
Please stop this old chauvinist song because we want to discuss how Americans feel in their own body not whether they are better off than some countries you even have never visited.
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Do you actually have any better ideas, or is this just a whine about it?
Oh yeah I have some ideas
1. Pass a law preventing the system from allowing child support to any woman who has 3 or more kids with three different fathers or more.
2. Fine women who would use child support money to get drunk
3. Shared custody if both parents are clinically fit, no matter if one is poor or rich.The one who is poor can decide on their own how many times they want to be with the child per week or per month.
4. Community involvement in domestic dispute issues ( church leaders, ethnic group leaders, etc) Less police involvement.
5. Even a 5 years old should have his/her voice heard when asked with whom she/he wants to spend more time ( mom or dad or a relative) then go from there to make things work.
6. Stop sending people to jail over silly domestic violence stuff such as " oh he pushed me, he put his hands on me ".
7. Mandatory civic education in school in K-12 ( Goal setting + commitment )
8. A Possibility of women paying child support to men.
Please stop this old chauvinist song because we want to discuss how Americans feel in their own body not whether they are better off than some countries you even have never visited.
I've visited over a dozen different countries.
How is it chauvinism to discuss the FACT that while our system isn't perfect, its better then the alternatives?
Do you even know what the word means?
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Oh yeah I have some ideas
1. Pass a law preventing the system from allowing child support to any woman who has 3 or more kids with three different fathers or more.
Uh huh. so punish the children, got it. And do recall that man #3 most likely had children with this woman knowing about the other two?
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2. Fine women who would use child support money to get drunk
Right, got it. You want to REALLY get the government involved with these people.
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3. Shared custody if both parents are clinically fit, no matter if one is poor or rich.The one who is poor can decide on their own how many time their want to be with the child per week or per month.
Shared custody can work with parents that get along. With ones that dont its a freaking nightmare for both the parents and the kids. Sooopunish everyone. got it.
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4. Community involvement in domestic dispute issues ( church leaders, ethnic group leaders, etc) Less police involvement.
So if you hit your wife, involve the church. Got it. You're a big fan of sharia law too?
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5. Even a 5 years old should have his/her voice heard when asked with whom their want to spend more time. ( mom and dad) then go from there to make things work.
After all the nonsense I thought I was going to just keep kicking your ideas apart. But on this particular one I sort of agree. But it also needs to be considered in context. I think part of the reason we dont is that all too often childrens parents get all manipulatively, and adding them to the mix in court gets nasty.
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6. Stop sending people to jail over silly domestic violence stuff such as " oh he pushed me, he put his hands on me ".
Hmmm.....talk don't push. we learned this in grade school. Pushing leads to punching. And all too often its too easy.
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7. Mandatory civic education in school in K-12 ( Goal setting + commitment )
Hmmm Ok it depends on the details.
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8. A Possibility of women paying child support to men.
Im a man, and have received child support. So let me assure you its a possibility. Course so far its only about 12K of the approx 49K I am owed....
PS, thank you for responding with ideas, I agreed with 1 or 2, the rest seemed out there, but it is nice to discuss ideas.
As a general rule, if the father does not have custody, it's because he is not fit to raise the child, so we can assume this isn't a common problem.
Does the farther technically have a right to see hid kid. I'd say so, but he's obviously done something to make the court think that's not a good idea. That being the case, it's best he keep his distance until the court changes their mind.
And I am aware that there are times when the court wrongfully denies custody to the father. The courts typically favor the mother in these situations.
So while the above circumstances are obviously unfortunate, we'd need more info to determine rather or not this is a serious problem that desperately needs attention.
In what universe are you residing? The real general rule here is that fathers regularly get screwed out of the ability to raise their own children by mothers and courts.
I've visited over a dozen different countries.
How is it chauvinism to discuss the FACT that while our system isn't perfect, its better then the alternatives?
Do you even know what the word means?
Do you know how many countries are there in the world today ? 196 ( if you separate Taiwan from China).
and what is 12 out of 196 ? it almost 6 % i.e 6 out of 100.
Thanks for drawing a conclusion after using a tiny sample, on purpose.
As for chauvinism, Why explain it to you , you can google.
Anyway remember this again:
Doing better than such or such country does not change anything to the ordeal someone is going through when his paycheck is feeding a gold digger who would use that money to go charm another man ( on purpose to get more child support)..
Again, thats not the system which was your point.
the same would be done in reverse, which is the flaw in your argument
I'm talking about "is being done " not would be done.
Like I say not all facts are in writing. And I will not give names of people I know. You can google or ask
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