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That's a rather oblique point to make, and I really don't think that the original (and obviously highly insulting post to you) was as directed directly at 'caribdoll' as you might think.
As an aside, I wonder sometimes if there's a physical or genetic proclivity for needing to view the world in a highly personal fashion. As usual, it seems like you can split the world into two groups. Those who look at everything in terms of themselves and their experiences, and those who look at it as an impersonal machine.
Then my post should not have been quoted, not assumptions made in regards to me.
Agree with the latter. Some of you should learn to do both rather than assume where people are coming from based on your own personal experiences.
lol. But it's true. It's surprising how genetic markers follow language. There was a long time period whem people got around less than you might think.
I would say 'congratulations' but that would be condescending and it sounds like you don't need to be congratulated for your achievements. You've taken advantage of the opportunities that have been afforded to you and you're on your way to success.
Just curious, did any of your black friend/schoolmates give you a hard time about working hard in school, wanting to go to college, etc?
First of all, thank you! I understand what you are trying to say.
Yes they did! My family (only my mom and brother at the time; my 10 year old sister was on the way) was still pretty poor when I was attending the 3rd grade. At that time, I was excelling at math. When we would have math competitions, I was considered the "secret weapon" for the boys. When the girls would lose, they would say something to the extent of "y'all have the white boy on yall's team (sic)". It got worse over the years. In the 5th grade, I was confronted by this kid named Sean. He asked me why I had to act so white and not like everyone else. He also said it was annoying to him and others.
One day in the 7th grade, I came home crying to my grandmother. By that time, the comments were extremely vicious. She said something that stuck with me and sort of changed my life. She said, "if they say you act white because you do well in school, then what is acting black?". That made me realize three things at that instant: I realized what the fish-in-the-bucket mentality was, I realized that "acting white" is nothing more than the attempt to be successful, and I realized that I shouldn't be mad/sad about it. After I graduated the 8th grade, I attended a really good Catholic high school in the Philly area.
I even get called white by other black people here in college. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm an authority figure as an RA. Others say it because I listen to rock (Smashing Pumpkins and Elton John are my favorites), hang out with mostly white friends, am a Republican (fiscally conservative, socially moderate), have a high GPA, and because I don't hold the mentality that the white man oppresses black people. That last point is absolutely not a lie. I used to get into many arguments with my ex-girlfriend over it. She's now my ex for a GOOD reason haha! My dad also calls me and my sister from another mother white. When we're together, he has said jokingly that her and I are going to have a competition to see who acts whiter.
As I've matured and gotten older, I have come to realized that this will be a part of my journey to success. Breaking the norms so commonly held in the ghetto will put a target on my head. I have also come to realize that I do not want to befriend anyone who has a ghetto attitude. I made the mistake of dating my ex-girlfriend who I thought would be different. Further along into our relationship, her true attitude really showed. Now I know to always go with my first intuition when it comes to chicks!
I'm black and I have NEVER encountered a problem with a police officer. I have done everything on that list except for numbers 7 and 9, and not one problem yet. If one is respectful and courteous towards a police officer, then nothing will happen. The last experience I had with a police officer came last November. I had driven up to State College, PA in my mom's car to see Penn State take on Michigan State. On the way back driving down US 322, I was kind of disoriented driving. The road was dark and mountainous, and there was little lighting. Plus, I was admittedly a little tired. Because I felt a little disoriented, I was switching lanes without using my turn signal. Passing through Dauphin County, I was about 8 miles north of Harrisburg when the officer initiated the stop. It was my first time being pulled over, so I was a little scared. It wasn't due to being apprehensive around police officers, but rather how to explain to my mom that I was pulled over in her car. Remembering what my mom had told me, I turned off the car, lowered the radio, and placed my hands on the steering wheel. A PA State Trooper walked over and asked me to produce my license and registration. I quickly produced my license, but I explained to him that it was my first traffic stop, so it would take me a minute to find it. I unintentionally pulled out an expired one, but he said that it was alright and ran my information. When he came back, he asked me what I had been doing. I told him that I was at the Penn State game earlier and that I was just driving home. At that point, he looked into my eyes and asked me if I had been drinking. I told him absolutely not while driving my mom's car! I admitted that I was pretty tired. He then went back to his car. A short while later, I was relieved to find out that he was giving me a warning! He handed me the paperwork and explained everything. I asked him where the nearest store was so that I could get something sugary to keep me up. He told me, and then I was on my way. I pulled off, never to see him again.
There are SOME officers who mess up, I admit that; however, the vast majority are great people. I have NEVER felt that I "can't do" something just because I am black. I frequently walk and run through white neighborhoods when I exercise, I travel all around the Philly area without worrying about a police encounter, I wait for the multiple modes of transportation SEPTA offers (bus, subway, trolley, trolleybus, and Regional Rail) both in Philadelphia and in the suburbs, and I feel unaffected by the stuff that goes on with other black people. As long as I am respectful, courteous, and compliant, everything will turn out well (and has so far!).
P.S. The kid who held the fake gun at the police officer TOTALLY deserved to be shot. Not only is it extremely stupid to commit such an act, but it also puts the police officer in a life-or-death situation. Many items can be made via 3-D printing nowadays. A gun can easily be printed out, split, and have components added so that it can act as a real gun. Why should a police officer potentially risk his life by not shooting a suspect with a weapon?
P.S.S. The only thing the McKinney incident "reminded" me of is what happens when you don't comply with the police. The officers had told the two boys involved to stay, but did they? No. They had to be cuffed because of their disobedience. The girl also looked as if she was trying to resist at one point. McKinney does not and will have no effect on how I live my life day-to-day.
P.S.S.S. I HATE the term "African-American" with a burning passion. I was not born in, have no connections (besides ancestral) to, nor have ever stepped foot in Africa. I was born in the suburbs of Philadelphia on August 29, 1995. I am an American who happens to be black.
You are 20 years old. When I was 20 I had never had a bad interaction with police either. It didn't start until my mid 20s actually.
And I have been harrassed and jailed even when I was respectful police. I also sued the police and they settled the case because they knew they were in the wrong. Unfortunately some areas just have bad policing. But I do agree that the majority of officers do a great job.
On the bold - you must not have seen the video if you are talking about Tamir Rice and your words are sickening to me if you have. I thought the same thing, that if he had a gun and pointed it at an officer and it looked like a real gun, I could see how he was shot being that at the time I had a 12 year old son, who is tall and people mistake him as an older person. But after watching the video that officer was WAY out of line. Tamir did not point the gun at the officer. Tamir was sitting at a pic nic table and the car pulled up less than a feet from him and officer jumped out of the car and shot the boy dead. It was unwarranted and sickening. You should watch the video. Also, please note that Cleveland has a long history of poor policing, as does Baltimore and as did Ferguson. Places where there is a bad policing have these issues. I also live in Ohio and where I live we don't have issues with our police, but in Atlanta, where I lived for many years, they have a very active police department who was known to harrass people unwarranted. Many people I know who moved there said they had never had a bad interaction with police until moving to the metro. Some counties were better than others, but if a place has frequent officer shootings on unarmed persons or non-violent children, has a history of abusing and harrassing the public, then something is going on in that location that is beyond "acting respectable" to officers.
Live a little and you may change your views like most young people do.
I'm one of them. I am 19, in college, and thriving here. I am a rising junior who is majoring in biochemistry and had intentions on attending medical school (I actually have to take my MCAT this semester). This past semester, I did some high-profile national research as a sophomore. I also became the first in my family to travel outside of the US when I visited Paris for the first time. In semester's past, I have achieved everything from admission into a prestigious leadership class where I interacted with several CEOs and PA politicians, made the Dean's List, became an elected Student Senator, became an RA in my residence hall, and even received a plaque from the PA House of Representatives for my demonstrated leadership.
The only way to move forward is to dump the lame slavery/government/"the man is oppressing me" excuse. I feel that absolutely nothing holds me back in life. I learned it all from my mom, who had me at 18 as a single mother, but worked very hard to get my family out of poverty. We were homeless at one point. Now, I'm attending college, my brother just left for Basic Training in the PA National Guard (he may go active), and my two beautiful sisters, ages 10 and 4, are bound for wonderful things. My 10 year old sister recently came in 3rd place in a countywide math competition. Out of the hundreds of children from over 41 school districts, SHE came in 3rd place. My mom now has an excellent job that supports our comfortable middle-class life. She's getting extremely close to six figures for someone who doesn't have a college degree (she will in 2016). All of this is possible because my family doesn't have the perpetual victim mentality. Some on my mom's side of the family and most on my dad's side do, and look where they are: in the hood with limited prospects.
Good for you for being a good student, but don't buy into the idea that most black people have the idea that "slavery/government/"the man" is "oppressing" them.
More black families are like yours than the other way around. Your story is similar to mine and I am older than you. Except we have many family members who have traveled extensively, luckily most of my family is pretty well established in middle class. But my mom was also a young teen mom and educated herself and started a business and all of her kids are doing well in life contrary to the black single mom stereotype of all us who were raised by single moms not knowing our dads or living off of welfare. Practically every black single mother I know is working and productive and is a great mom.
So to me all that isn't all that note worthy. It is stuff you are supposed to do, you and your mom and your siblings.
Hopefully you will continue to have all positive interactions with others. But again, I will mention that I had not had any negative racial incidences or conversations at all until I got out of college. Once you get around non-academic, non PC persons, you find that as a black person, people assume a lot of stupid things about you just because you are black. One that comes to mind that will probably arise for you is that if you obtain really good employment, some people automatically assume that you are an Affirmative Action candidate and aren't as smart as a white or Asian person and you don't really belong. I have had this happen to me, even though I was an HBCU person and worked for majority black organizations (our clients actually asked me if I was an affirmative action student lol and when I informed them I went to an HBCU, they spoke of how they felt that HBCUs were inferior to mainstream colleges so I probably wasn't as smart as someone who went to the state school down the road lol),
First of all, thank you! I understand what you are trying to say.
Yes they did! My family (only my mom and brother at the time; my 10 year old sister was on the way) was still pretty poor when I was attending the 3rd grade. At that time, I was excelling at math. When we would have math competitions, I was considered the "secret weapon" for the boys. When the girls would lose, they would say something to the extent of "y'all have the white boy on yall's team (sic)". It got worse over the years. In the 5th grade, I was confronted by this kid named Sean. He asked me why I had to act so white and not like everyone else. He also said it was annoying to him and others.
One day in the 7th grade, I came home crying to my grandmother. By that time, the comments were extremely vicious. She said something that stuck with me and sort of changed my life. She said, "if they say you act white because you do well in school, then what is acting black?". That made me realize three things at that instant: I realized what the fish-in-the-bucket mentality was, I realized that "acting white" is nothing more than the attempt to be successful, and I realized that I shouldn't be mad/sad about it. After I graduated the 8th grade, I attended a really good Catholic high school in the Philly area.
I even get called white by other black people here in college. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm an authority figure as an RA. Others say it because I listen to rock (Smashing Pumpkins and Elton John are my favorites), hang out with mostly white friends, am a Republican (fiscally conservative, socially moderate), have a high GPA, and because I don't hold the mentality that the white man oppresses black people. That last point is absolutely not a lie. I used to get into many arguments with my ex-girlfriend over it. She's now my ex for a GOOD reason haha! My dad also calls me and my sister from another mother white. When we're together, he has said jokingly that her and I are going to have a competition to see who acts whiter.
As I've matured and gotten older, I have come to realized that this will be a part of my journey to success. Breaking the norms so commonly held in the ghetto will put a target on my head. I have also come to realize that I do not want to befriend anyone who has a ghetto attitude. I made the mistake of dating my ex-girlfriend who I thought would be different. Further along into our relationship, her true attitude really showed. Now I know to always go with my first intuition when it comes to chicks!
Dude, seriously, if something doesn't work out in a STEM field, or even if it does, you should look into politics. Have you ever read about Tim Scott, Senator from SC? You sound very similar to him.
But seriously man, good job on staying the course and keeping focused on the end prize.
I'm older than you, so I can say things like 'Good job young man' and not mean it to be patronizing.
First of all, thank you! I understand what you are trying to say.
Yes they did! My family (only my mom and brother at the time; my 10 year old sister was on the way) was still pretty poor when I was attending the 3rd grade. At that time, I was excelling at math. When we would have math competitions, I was considered the "secret weapon" for the boys. When the girls would lose, they would say something to the extent of "y'all have the white boy on yall's team (sic)". It got worse over the years. In the 5th grade, I was confronted by this kid named Sean. He asked me why I had to act so white and not like everyone else. He also said it was annoying to him and others.
One day in the 7th grade, I came home crying to my grandmother. By that time, the comments were extremely vicious. She said something that stuck with me and sort of changed my life. She said, "if they say you act white because you do well in school, then what is acting black?". That made me realize three things at that instant: I realized what the fish-in-the-bucket mentality was, I realized that "acting white" is nothing more than the attempt to be successful, and I realized that I shouldn't be mad/sad about it. After I graduated the 8th grade, I attended a really good Catholic high school in the Philly area.
I even get called white by other black people here in college. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm an authority figure as an RA. Others say it because I listen to rock (Smashing Pumpkins and Elton John are my favorites), hang out with mostly white friends, am a Republican (fiscally conservative, socially moderate), have a high GPA, and because I don't hold the mentality that the white man oppresses black people. That last point is absolutely not a lie. I used to get into many arguments with my ex-girlfriend over it. She's now my ex for a GOOD reason haha! My dad also calls me and my sister from another mother white. When we're together, he has said jokingly that her and I are going to have a competition to see who acts whiter.
As I've matured and gotten older, I have come to realized that this will be a part of my journey to success. Breaking the norms so commonly held in the ghetto will put a target on my head. I have also come to realize that I do not want to befriend anyone who has a ghetto attitude. I made the mistake of dating my ex-girlfriend who I thought would be different. Further along into our relationship, her true attitude really showed. Now I know to always go with my first intuition when it comes to chicks!
The bold made me chucke!
You are 20. You're not very old or mature and honestly, I can tell from your comments that you are very young.
And sorry to say, that it seems you are associating "goodness" with white people. I was never accused of "acting white" by anyone other than a white teacher who said I "talked white." I told her that was not possible since I am black. White does not equal good or successful and acknowledging that the system of white supremacy does exist and is at play in our society doesn't mean that you limit your options as a black person. Since you are young, I'll recommend some books for you by black authors:
Don't Believe the Hype - Farai Chedeya
The Philadelphia Negro (since you are from Philadelphia and this was the first study done on urban black Americans) - WEB DuBois The Miseducation of the Negro - Carter G Woodson (if you don't read any of them, please read this one, it is still relevant for black people today and is something I personally feel all black persons aged 18-25 should read as they start out their lives you can get in for $.99 on kindle or nook).
The New Jim Crow - Michele Alexander
Up From Slavery - Booker T. Washington
The Warmth of Other Suns - Isabel Wilkerson
Race Matters - Cornel West
Acting White: The Ironic Legacy of De-Segregation - Stuart Buck (great read, mentions how the teasing about "acting white" is more prominent in racially integrated schools versus predominantly black)
Slavery by Another Name: The Re-Enslavement of Black People in America from Civil War to WWII - Douglas A. Blackmon (this is also a documentary)
ETA: Want to clarify as well in regards to me stating that it seems you associate goodness with white, in that you mention all those things as if that makes you drastically different from other black people. I went to an HBCU and was a top student as well, no one ever mentioned that I "acted white" or said I was white because there are all sorts of black people and we all like a varying amount of entertainment and books (as you can tell from above, I am an avid reader and a book worm and have been since I was 3 years old). I knew people in college who were into all sorts of music, being black doesn't mean you have to like a specific amount of music. One of my good friends in college is now into K-Pop (Japanese pop music). I like country music and jazz and old school rock, the blues (I play 5 instruments), old school hip hop, contemporary, classical, and traditional gospel/negro spiritual music.
I am only saying this to let you know that on the black thing you are not all the unique amongst us. Most of us are smart and get educated and live our daily lives. Be aware of people who try to tell you what it means to be black. Being black is being yourself if you are a black American, nothing more, nothing less. I have been accused of being a "black Republican" lol, but I am an independent and do not ascribe to the beliefs of any political party. I think for myself and vote on issues and I also know that racial discrimination did exist and still does. I have experienced much less of it than my parents and grandparents and especially great grandparents, and I am hopeful that your generation will experience less than I have. But there are still discriminatory systems in our country and you shouldn't flat out deny that just because you hang out with white people and they aren't oppressive to you. Most white people are very nice, regular people IMO. But the criminal justice system does have a bias as do employers and hopefully you won't have to experience that, but once you hit the real job market, that is when you more than likely will experience the biases against black people that are still prevalent in our society.
Last edited by residinghere2007; 06-16-2015 at 01:27 PM..
Unfortunately, we are now living in a society which condemns enforcement of the law when minorities are involved, as it is "racist".
What is one to do these days if a throng of uninvited guests show up at a social gathering? Take the law into your own hands?
It wasn't a "mob."
It was the first week school was out. A stupid girl and her mother decided to have a pool party without checking their HOA rules (or perhaps not caring). They had it advertised through social media, which attracted a large group of kids from that girl's subdivision as well as adjoining subdivisions.
A large proportion of those kids were dropped off at the pool by their mothers--middle class kids from adjoining middle-class suburban subdivisions. Nobody walks anywhere in north Dallas suburbs.
Far too many kids showed up, certainly enough to provoke calls to the police from a number of sources. The police arrived, broke it up.
But a lot of kids had to wait for their mothers to pick them up, especially if during the police breakup they got separated from their backpacks and phones.
And that is why there were a lot of kids standing around. They were waiting for their mothers to pick them up.
Blacks don't want to act or be White. They want to just be Black.
That's why Blacks should have their own communities where they can play their music as loud as they want, talk how they want, and act how they want without Whites constantly judging them. Black lives belong to Blacks and only Blacks can govern and police Black people.
You are absolutely correct, blacks don't want anything to do with whites, they don't want to obey white law, white education, white business method. They just want to do what they want. Walk down the middle of streets, attack shop owners of other ethics. I agree with you, they need their own community and laws.
You are absolutely correct, blacks don't want anything to do with whites, they don't want to obey white law, white education, white business method. They just want to do what they want. Walk down the middle of streets, attack shop owners of other ethics. I agree with you, they need their own community and laws.
What is being black or white? One of you generational Americans should explain to me. Really, you all are more similar than different in many ways, imho.
Would being white mean having gangs that shoot up places, kill people and still be treated in a civil manner? Tote big guns everywhere without being harassed etc. No other American can do such things.
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