Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Oh, I agree with that 100%. The thing that upsets me is seeing people who are probably essentially decent folks at each other's throats.
I think we all already know the identities of those who are not decent.
I'm sorry if you think I'm one of the "indecent" ones.
On this topic I feel it's important to listen to everybody and discount nobody. None of us know what lies in the hearts and minds of another and this topic will net opinions all across the board. Everyone's experience is valid. None of it is indecent.
I'm sorry if you think I'm one of the "indecent" ones.
On this topic I feel it's important to listen to everybody and discount nobody. None of us know what lies in the hearts and minds of another and this topic will Net opinions all across the board. Everyone's experience is valid. None of it is indecent.
Well, this is just my opinion. I think you might be a little bit confused here. (I don't say this to be difficult or obnoxious)
When it comes to survivor experience, you are absolutely right, everybody's experience is unique. There is no right or wrong way to COPE. They say grief is an individual journey. You cannot get "over" it, you cannot get "under" it, you can only get through it.
This said, No one, no institution or part of our society, is free from stigma associated with suicide and mental illness. Changing this will be an enormous endeavor. What will it require? Raising our voices individually and collectively, as some attempt survivors have. Working with our mental-health providers and places of worship, to quell fears of lawsuits and unfavorable public opinion. Examining our own misconceptions, and striving for greater sensitivity. And that’s just a short list.
Before my late boyfriend committed suicide, I was ignorant about the subject.I was also one of those people who believed suicide was a somewhat selfish act. Suicide is always the skeleton in OTHER people's closet. After my late boyfriend's suicide, I realized that if this could happen to a girl next door like myself, it could happen to everybody. It took me two years to realize it is a complicated issue. I thought i was a suicide expert. I thought I could help people, I thought I was a compassionate person.. Until i lost three of my BEST childhood friends to suicide, I realized that I couldn't help no one. I am still ignorant about the subject, I am still clueless. Suicide is a monster, it really is.
People who committed suicide are not cowards or selfish. calling them cowards or selfish is not just an opinion, it really isn't. It is simply WRONG. There are many different causes of suicide. My late boyfriend was a successful lawyer, my friends were special forces Marines. These were some great men in my life. You can debate about the causes of their suicide, but calling them weak or coward is simply untrue.
Last edited by lilyflower3191981; 08-03-2017 at 04:31 PM..
I'm sorry if you think I'm one of the "indecent" ones.
On this topic I feel it's important to listen to everybody and discount nobody. None of us know what lies in the hearts and minds of another and this topic will Net opinions all across the board. Everyone's experience is valid. None of it is indecent.
Yet earlier you said that if a person were offended by the OP's opinion, then they need not actually respond.
But if they don't respond to said opinion, then how did you put it up there...?
"I feel it's important to listen to everybody..."
You do see the obvious contradiction in your two statements, right?
This was the very heart of the matter of my original response to you. If you cannot see how you just contradicted yourself, then you are right. It is completely fruitless to continue discussing anything with you and yes, what I referred to earlier about you was more than likely correct.
Last edited by Starman71; 08-03-2017 at 04:32 PM..
I've had sporadic suicidal thoughts since the age of 14. I remember listening to a song below and saying "Yea, I understand what he is trying to say" The thoughts come and go through my life but I try to find a way to get out of the "dark hole." I guess I will always struggle with depression. I do understand being so sad and in so much pain, that you want it to stop. Some find their final solution in suicide. It is sad and the people who experience deep depression, hopefully can get some help.
Well, this is just my opinion. I think you might be a little bit confused here. (I don't say this to be difficult or obnoxious)
When it comes to survivor experience, you are absolutely right, everybody's experience is unique. There is no right or wrong way to COPE. They say grief is an individual journey. You cannot get "over" it, you cannot get "under" it, you can only get through it.
This said, No one, no institution or part of our society, is free from stigma associated with suicide and mental illness. Changing this will be an enormous endeavor. What will it require? Raising our voices individually and collectively, as some attempt survivors have. Working with our mental-health providers and places of worship, to quell fears of lawsuits and unfavorable public opinion. Examining our own misconceptions, and striving for greater sensitivity. And that’s just a short list.
I agree with you.
What I saw happen here though was a huge gangbang on the OP for expressing his/her self in a way unpopular with some people. Many posters were quick to lambaste the OP for his/her opinion and tone and tell him/her repeatedly how offended they were and what an insensitive person the OP was and then continue harping on him/her over how THEY felt. Lots of condemnation and projection and very little understanding here. I read the OP and immediately thought to myself that they really sounded like the words of a hurt person affected by suicide. My immediate instinct was not to come out swinging at the OP, because if my hunch was correct, I know how valid those angry feelings are. I know that not everybody responds with tears.
If the OP was a-trollin' then the jokes on me. I'll survive.
Yet earlier you said that if a person were offended by the OP's opinion, then they need not actually respond.
Mmm no. That's not what I said. I called people who proclaim to be offended by something but whom voluntarily thrust themselves into the discussion of the thing that offends them anyway "suckers for punishment".
It's ok that you disagree with me. I don't care. It seems you really wish to dig your heels in however by reporting my posts AND continuing to try and engage me at the same time. That makes about as much sense as complaining that something offends you, but choosing to mire yourself deeply into the thing that offends you.
What I saw happen here though was a huge gangbang on the OP for expressing his/her self in a way unpopular with some people. Many posters were quick to lambaste the OP for his/her opinion and tone and tell him/her repeatedly how offended they were and what an insensitive person the OP was and then continue harping on him/her over how THEY felt. Lots of condemnation and projection and very little understanding here. I read the OP and immediately thought to myself that they really sounded like the words of a hurt person affected by suicide. My immediate instinct was not to come out swinging at the OP, because if my hunch was correct, I know how valid those angry feelings are. I know that not everybody responds with tears.
If the OP was a-trollin' then the jokes on me. I'll survive.
It is not about what you say, it is how you say it.
Using words like A weasel's way out of life? and or LOONS to describe people is not the way to make a valid argument.
Anger is a natural stage of grief. I agree with you on this one. Maybe I was wrong, but I doubt OP has lost a loved one to suicide. If he or she did, I apologize. But this (he or she has NEVER lost a loved one to suicide) would be my assumption.
I know somebody who killed him or herself =/= I lost a loved one to suicide.
It is not about what you say, it is how you say it.
Using words like A weasel's way out of life? and or LOONS to describe people is not the way to make a valid argument.
Anger is a natural stage of grief. Maybe I was wrong, but I doubt OP has lost a loved one to suicide. If he or she did, I apologize. But this would be my assumption.
I know somebody who killed him or herself =/= I lost a loved one to suicide.
Just sayin'
Everybody's experience matters. If you've paid attention to my posts you'd see that I have commented on the OP's tone. I don't agree with it. Or his assessment. But that doesn't make his experience (if indeed he had one) any less relevant. I've also talked about my own experience with suicide in this thread. I've seen people dealing with loss take that same tone. It's not for me to play guessing games with the OP's personal experience. I do not believe that a licensed psychiatrist would recoil in such fashion to his opinion. It stands to use some correction via education. That's not what's happening here though with the exception of a couple great resourceful posts including the one you left a page or so back. It seems a lot of people here have experience with suicide but struggle to accept that survivors all deal with grief differently and for some, anger is their outlet.
Everybody's experience matters. If you've paid attention to my posts you'd see that I have commented on the OP's tone. I don't agree with it. Or his assessment. But that doesn't make his experience (if indeed he had one) any less relevant. I've also talked about my own experience with suicide in this thread. I've seen people dealing with loss take that same tone. It's not for me to play guessing games with the OP's personal experience. I do not believe that a licensed psychiatrist would recoil in such fashion to his opinion. It stands to use some correction via education. That's not what's happening here though with the exception of a couple great resourceful posts including the one you left a page or so back. It seems a lot of people here have experience with suicide but struggle to accept that survivors all deal with grief differently and for some, anger is their outlet.
well, if op is indeed a suicide survivor ( those who lost loved ones to suicide) it seems like he's stuck in the anger stage of his grief.
Like I said, I doubt he lost a loved one to suicide.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
