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Old 12-11-2017, 11:42 AM
 
13,898 posts, read 6,443,819 times
Reputation: 6960

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Quote:
Originally Posted by JerseyGirl415 View Post
I did not say that women need to be told they're beautiful and look good all the time, so stop projecting your bias and agenda on me. You can tell family or friends they look tired but it is inappropriate when a stranger who is waiting on you in a restaurant or other setting does so - man or woman, either customer or server. Basic social skills. It isn't about sex or gender, it's common decency as someone who is serving the public.

I did not even mention gender in my post aside from the first part, which you were not responding to.
Stop trying so hard to be so politically correct. People make small talk out of all sorts of things. This is perfectly acceptable. If you don't like it don't respond to such a thing if it's ever said to you, but don't sit here and try to tell everyone else how they should "behave". You nor anyone else holds any moral superiority in that arena especially when it involves something as inane as this.
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Old 12-11-2017, 11:43 AM
 
404 posts, read 193,427 times
Reputation: 242
Quote:
Originally Posted by prospectheightsresident View Post
The new left really is something else. Just got through reading a social media post from a law school classmate who now lives overseas in Europe. She was highly upset because, while tired with the kids out and about at a cafe, a male cafe worker remarked that she "looked tired." Apparently, this was taken to be "remarking on [her] body" and was highly offensive and sexist She made a follow-on comment that her husband would never receive such a comment if he was out with the kids and looked tired and even acknowledged that the cafe worker's tone was one of concern.

While I hope most sane people will see the lunacy in this woman's reaction, sadly her reaction is symptomatic of how many on the left feel and think today; her post was "liked" by numerous fellow leftists. When it comes to the point where you as a male cannot make a comment as simple and harmless as "you look tired" to someone who does look tired without being accused of sexism and body shaming, we've officially fallen off the deep end.

As I've mentioned before, I have no problem with the leftists and liberals of the old days. This new breed of constantly offended, Social Justice Warriors, however, are beyond redemption.
There will be a day coming not very long from now where social media sites will greet people with the warning :

Social media might be detrimental to the health of your relationships and even social life. Proceed with caution.

A red flag is for anyone far too involved it has become an addiction with the unhinged reactions and triggered responses akin to a junkie too strung out to know the difference anymore. Social media has the potential to destroy if we let it.
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Old 12-11-2017, 11:47 AM
 
12,883 posts, read 13,990,431 times
Reputation: 18451
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dbones View Post
Stop trying so hard to be so politically correct. People make small talk out of all sorts of things. This is perfectly acceptable. If you don't like it don't respond to such a thing if it's ever said to you, but don't sit here and try to tell everyone else how they should "behave". You nor anyone else holds any moral superiority in that arena especially when it involves something as inane as this.
I'm far from PC. Again with assuming things where I have not said them. You seem to have an issue with that. Your responses to this are weird, how about you stop taking it so personally and get over it. I'm not trying to tell anyone how to behave, I'm sharing my own opinion and experiences. If someone want to say such a thing to a paying customer, that's on them, they may do what they want, but don't act shocked at an annoyed response to it. As I said, I worked in service and would not have dreamed to tell a customer they look tired. It just isn't necessary.
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Old 12-11-2017, 12:37 PM
 
4,050 posts, read 6,140,296 times
Reputation: 1574
No. Just no. Don't tell people they "look tired." I thought this was common sense. I can see a kid or teenager not understanding, but once you're an adult, you should know better. This isn't a partisan issue. People dislike it when strangers make negative remarks about their appearance. This is right up there with "Why don't you smile more?" "You'd be so pretty if you lost weight!" and "Why don't you try wearing contacts?"
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Old 12-11-2017, 03:51 PM
 
Location: Houston
5,993 posts, read 3,733,906 times
Reputation: 4160
Quote:
Originally Posted by prospectheightsresident View Post
She's a SJW. And her reaction is typical of the leftists that I know today. It really is sad.

I can get that she can be tired of hearing how tired she looks, but to make it a case of sexism is a bit ridiculous.
How many leftists do you personally know?

I personally know individuals on both the far right and far left and I can tell you without a doubt that they are all completely nuts. The only difference is their respective ideologies.

My point is that neither side can point to the other and claim only that side is crazy. Well, they can if they want to be dishonest.
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Old 12-11-2017, 04:17 PM
 
Location: LEAVING CD
22,974 posts, read 27,011,790 times
Reputation: 15645
Quote:
Originally Posted by JerseyGirl415 View Post
It's not that hard to deduce that tired people do not look good relatively speaking. Men may simply mean "you look tired," but surely they can understand that one who looks tired does not look their best. There is a reason you notice that they look tired, and it's because maybe they don't look peppy or particularly happy, they may have bags under their eyes, red eyes, pale skin, etc. Perhaps women are just smarter than men for getting that?

I can't believe there are people who see no issue with a waiter saying this to a patron. It just isn't appropriate. That alone is a separate issue from whatever one may infer from such a comment. I worked in food service throughout school for years and I would never have told a customer such a thing. What did I do, though? Compliment them on things I liked about them occasioanally - I love your nails, nice shirt, I like your bag, etc. THAT is appropriate small talk in such a setting. Not telling someone she looks tired. That's more invasive into someone's life than a simple compliment, or commenting about the snow coming down outside or something.
You're making my point very well. No, men usually don't understand past what's actually said instead of the female round-a-bout disjointed conversations that need an interpreter. Secondly, nobody knows the conversation that might have taken place before the alleged "offending" remark.

That's why men and women have so many disagreements...
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Old 12-11-2017, 04:30 PM
 
Location: 500 miles from home
33,942 posts, read 22,527,236 times
Reputation: 25816
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dbones View Post
Stop trying so hard to be so politically correct. People make small talk out of all sorts of things. This is perfectly acceptable. If you don't like it don't respond to such a thing if it's ever said to you, but don't sit here and try to tell everyone else how they should "behave". You nor anyone else holds any moral superiority in that arena especially when it involves something as inane as this.
Cons are to the point where common MANNERS are 'politically correct"
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Old 12-11-2017, 04:56 PM
 
12,883 posts, read 13,990,431 times
Reputation: 18451
Quote:
Originally Posted by jimj View Post
You're making my point very well. No, men usually don't understand past what's actually said instead of the female round-a-bout disjointed conversations that need an interpreter. Secondly, nobody knows the conversation that might have taken place before the alleged "offending" remark.

That's why men and women have so many disagreements...
If I'm making your point then you agree that it's a rude comment to make because of what it infers. The fact that some men don't get the inference isn't an excuse. Again, you comment in the first place because it is noticeable that one is tired. They look tired, which means they don't look good. It's not a difficult connection to make here.
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Old 12-11-2017, 05:01 PM
 
Location: Upstate NY 🇺🇸
36,754 posts, read 14,825,823 times
Reputation: 35584
Anyone who tells a woman who's had a good night's sleep that she "looks tired," does so at his own risk.
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Old 12-11-2017, 05:05 PM
 
Location: Florida
76,971 posts, read 47,629,107 times
Reputation: 14806
Quote:
Originally Posted by prospectheightsresident View Post
She's a SJW. And her reaction is typical of the leftists that I know today. It really is sad.

I can get that she can be tired of hearing how tired she looks, but to make it a case of sexism is a bit ridiculous.
Her reaction is in line with your reaction to her post. You must be a flaming leftist.
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