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Because it is archaic to have a daddy-daughter dance and assumes we follow the traditional nuclear family less and less. To be fair, military families and girls haven't always had. If you wanted to live up what your screenname, you might have wanted to look into this... We are at 68% of families are the traditional nuclear family rather than 93% from 60 years ago. We have a lot more non-traditional families and we need to be accepting of it. Saying people to suck it up with the daddy-daughter dances, is just going to cause more issues. This is why this is "so hard to understand." As for your award ceremony dinner, that is just a stupid point because most people aren't athletes and know that. To say a girl can't go with her mom to a daddy-daughter dance because she isn't daddy is just heartless.
It's a daddy-daughter dance.
Get over it.
If your daddy won't take you, your mommy doesn't know who your daddy is or otherwise? Guess what? You don't go.
Life sucks.
If you aren't an athlete, you don't go to a sports award dinner/ceremony.
Life sucks.
End of story.
You might want to lay off what "screen names mean"...given your latter half is "punk".
This world is ****ed. People get sexual thoughts just thinking about father daughter dance...
Maybe they are talking from experience which is even worse.
If your daddy won't take you, your mommy doesn't know who your daddy is or otherwise? Guess what? You don't go.
Life sucks.
If you aren't an athlete, you don't go to a sports award dinner/ceremony.
Life sucks.
End of story.
You might want to lay off what "screen names mean"...given your latter half is "punk".
Your posts are misinformed and full of bon marts as well as contempt for other views than your own, you have the problem like those who asked to cancel dances. There were several other posts saying that at other "daddy-daughter" dances there was allowance for a mom. However some ended it over paremts like you (who have to be busy bodies) complaining about transsexuals.
As for the athletes, I can't explain it because it is irrelevant and if you think it is, then three is nothing left to say about any topic because it is a point that has little barring to a daddy-daughter dance.
If a child has lost their father, it does the child no good to prevent them from dealing with it. If you always shield your child from being reminded of the loss of her father, she is going to grow up always feeling like a victim because of it. If you can teach her to deal with her loss in a healthy way, by helping her deal with innocent day-to-day events like father-daughter dances, you will be helping your child, not hurting her.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raddo
Wow. If that is the best you can do as a parent, then I can't help it that you can't comprehend teachable moments. It wouldn't be that hard to treat the child to an evening that would be the envy of all the daughters attending the dance, which is a lot better idea than cancelling all father/daughter events just because a lot of daughters still have fathers.
Quote:
Originally Posted by lisanicole1
Growing up we had daddy daughter dances every year for brownie/Girl Scout. We also had girls who had no fathers due to death. Guess what? Dances went on and they took another family member/friend. Was it hard? I am sure it was. However, those kids learned life does not mold to you instead you mold to life. You get thrown a lemon you make lemonade. They grew up knowing adult life is difficult and can cope. Raising our children without hardships is not the right way. Look at the shooting today. Who knows? Maybe that sicko could not handle a bad situation because he was never handed one growing up.
Exactly!
very well said
Plus, change the event name to Parent-Kid dance or cancelling the event does NOT change the fact that life is imperfect. Some kids will grew up without fathers.
These events are available for people who want them! No more, no less. Kids will always cry and ask, "How come other kids have fathers, and I don't" No Matter What! Should we cancel TV shows for fatherless children too?
My little Godson has no mother. He has ALWAYS been asked by other kids, "How come your mother does not love you anymore?" Do you HONESTLY think cancelling a school event will prevent him from being reminded that he does not have a mother?
Maybe somebody need to learn a few tips how to raise resilient kids,
For example, how about avoid eliminating all risk and teach them to problem-solve.
In moments of repair, children begin to develop a more balanced, less all-or-nothing perspective on the disappointments and frustrations in their lives. As a result, they will be better able to “regulate” their emotions—they will be less urgent in their expressions of distress, less insistent in their demands, and able to think more constructively about how to solve emotional problems. Moments of repair may also reduce a child’s level of physiological stress.
Fatherless children need to grieve properly. They will ask, "how come other kids have fathers, and I don't" when they see little kids with their fathers in the malls.. It is simple as that.
I say, Be honest with your child. All of the changes of divorce and separation and death can be scary. Being upfront with her or him about what to expect can help restore confidence.
For the people who want to cancel the event or change the name of the event for fatherless children, I get it, you want to protect these children. But you are not doing these children any favor.
My little Godson will always have reminder in life that he will grow up without a biological mother. Nothing, absolutely nothing can make it better or change the fact that he has no mother! Most times the "remark" and "questions" are from other children. "How come you don't have a mom?" "Where is your mom, she doesn't love you anymore?"
We teach the little boy that even though he doesn't have a mother, he has people love him very much and unconditionally. He can always come to us if he needs us. We are going to be there for him unconditionally. That is the best we can do honestly.
Nowadays, he just says, "I don't have a mom, but I have a dad and a Godmother, and that is okay."
Kids need to learn life can be imperfect at times, but it is still OK.
Don't be silly, change the event name or cancel the event will not help the kids. What helps? Well, teach them, Life can be scary at times, but it will still be O.K.
Last edited by lilyflower3191981; 02-15-2018 at 06:43 AM..
Maybe instead of a father-daughter dance, they could rename it the Donald-Ivanka dance. "Hey honey, after the next dance can you sit on Daddy's lap?" "You know how happy it makes me ...especially now that you're 24!"
Quote:
Originally Posted by Atalanta
Something with you is not ok
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheEmissary
No ...something in Trump is not O.K. and you seem to be fine with it! Pot meet Kettle!
Why not just retitle the event a "Family Dance", and encourage students to bring one of more of their family's grown-ups along? Simple solution to an overblown issue.
The "grown-ups" could be a father, mother, stepparent, aunt, uncle, grandparent, adult cousin, parent's partner...godparent, older sibling, or any other adult in a nurturing and caring relationship with the student. Scout leader, pastor, music teacher, etc. Just a caring grown-up, relationship left open to the student's discretion.
Problem solved.
We used to have "Dads & Donuts" at my kid's school. Of course there are now a few Lesbian couples with kids there so they switched it to "Parents & Pastries."
Why not just retitle the event a "Family Dance", and encourage students to bring one of more of their family's grown-ups along? Simple solution to an overblown issue.
The "grown-ups" could be a father, mother, stepparent, aunt, uncle, grandparent, adult cousin, parent's partner...godparent, older sibling, or any other adult in a nurturing and caring relationship with the student. Scout leader, pastor, music teacher, etc. Just a caring grown-up, relationship left open to the student's discretion.
Problem solved.
Exactly, why do conservatives have to throw temper tantrums and get all stompy foot instead of just making minor changes to make the event more inclusive and modern? Only fools expect things to stay the same forever.
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We are at 68% of families are the traditional nuclear family rather than 93% from 60 years ago. We have a lot more non-traditional families and we need to be accepting of it. Saying people to suck it up with the daddy-daughter dances, is just going to cause more issues. This is why this is "so hard to understand." As for your award ceremony dinner, that is just a stupid point because most people aren't athletes and know that. To say a girl can't go with her mom to a daddy-daughter dance because she isn't daddy is just heartless.
