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A little background- I, and my family, used to be democrat supporters for a long time. The democrats stood for the lower and middle class, and we felt they wanted to help us. But after many years, we realized we really weren't seeing any change in our lives when they were in office. We made less money, taxes went up, gas prices went up, trade deals were poor, and we then realized we wanted a change. When we learned more about Donald Trump and what he fought for- better trade deals for america- which he's done, less taxes taken out- people keep more of their money in their own pockets, fighting against trafficking drug and child, criminal justice reform, and better healthcare for all including lower prices and more choices, we knew this sounded more for us. Ever since, I have been a huge Trump supporter. I feel and have seen him actually pull through on many of these initiatives and it's very reassuring that he sticks to his word on these important things. This does help all american's in the long run.
This post is not about Trump- so please don't bash me on that. I find that as Americans we should all be entitled to like what we want. America is land of the free for a reason.
What I struggle with now is that all my young friends- I'm 29, are all die hard left supporters. I feel like I have to hide a big part of my personality, my opinion, and who I am, around them because all they do is gang up on you to prove you are wrong, and are constantly post on social media how you are terrible for supporting Trump. Their biggest fighting point is trying to make you feel like a bad person. I know I am not a terrible person, and I don't think my friends terrible for liking democrats. I would never say that. But they judge me on who I like, and I find it very sad. I am a good person, I help people in my community, I have a good job which I take pride in, and I take pride in being American. My friends post on facebook how if you like him you are racist and you support white supremacy. I do not support those things at all. But I do support trump, who has also said he does not support any of that many many times, contrary to popular belief. The first ever execution he put forth was for a white supremacist.
My friends want everything for free- free college, free healthcare, and free free free. I don't agree. I feel like I want to pay for myself and myself only. I do not want to pay for everyone's healthcare. Just my opinion. And I do not want to spend the next 50 years paying for everyone to go to college. I already paid for myself to go. When I mention to my friends that taxes will go up a ton for us to be paying for free college and healthcare, they think that miraculously that won't happen and the money will just come out of thin air?
They gang up on me and so I just stay quiet. The facebook posts recently have gotten so bad. That if you support him, you support white supremacy, or crooked cops, or racism. I do not support that but I do support Trump. I feel insulted that they are posting such things, because it is directly is affecting me. I keep my mouth shut. I only commented one time, and was instantly ganged up on. I hate that I can't even be upfront and honest with my friends. I feel like I do have to lie all the time and stay quiet. I've told them that I am a republican. But they will say nasty comments out loud about Trump in my presence and I just stay quiet, to avoid a ganged up argument. I also have to hide at work. I work for an organization that is solely liberal in nature, 95% of the workers are liberal. Some of them even have Biden stickers on their office doors. I find this to be in poor professional taste. I don't promote my political views at work. They bash Trump at work and I just sit shaking my head in agreement, when I feel the opposite. I think if I ever actually said what I truly feel, they would find a way to fire me. I'm accepting of everyone democrat or republican if you are a standup good person, but people at work literally say how they hate republicans, just for being one. I think that is wrong.
Does anyone else feel like they have to hide who they are and what they think?
There are good and bad aspects to both sides of the political spectrum. But when I read your post, all I see is "I,I,I," and "me,me,me". Try and take a look from a lens of "what is good for the entire country" and not just "what is good for me".
A little background- I, and my family, used to be democrat supporters for a long time. The democrats stood for the lower and middle class, and we felt they wanted to help us. But after many years, we realized we really weren't seeing any change in our lives when they were in office. We made less money, taxes went up, gas prices went up, trade deals were poor, and we then realized we wanted a change. When we learned more about Donald Trump and what he fought for- better trade deals for america- which he's done, less taxes taken out- people keep more of their money in their own pockets, fighting against trafficking drug and child, criminal justice reform, and better healthcare for all including lower prices and more choices, we knew this sounded more for us. Ever since, I have been a huge Trump supporter. I feel and have seen him actually pull through on many of these initiatives and it's very reassuring that he sticks to his word on these important things. This does help all american's in the long run.
This post is not about Trump- so please don't bash me on that. I find that as Americans we should all be entitled to like what we want. America is land of the free for a reason.
What I struggle with now is that all my young friends- I'm 29, are all die hard left supporters. I feel like I have to hide a big part of my personality, my opinion, and who I am, around them because all they do is gang up on you to prove you are wrong, and are constantly post on social media how you are terrible for supporting Trump. Their biggest fighting point is trying to make you feel like a bad person. I know I am not a terrible person, and I don't think my friends terrible for liking democrats. I would never say that. But they judge me on who I like, and I find it very sad. I am a good person, I help people in my community, I have a good job which I take pride in, and I take pride in being American. My friends post on facebook how if you like him you are racist and you support white supremacy. I do not support those things at all. But I do support trump, who has also said he does not support any of that many many times, contrary to popular belief. The first ever execution he put forth was for a white supremacist.
My friends want everything for free- free college, free healthcare, and free free free. I don't agree. I feel like I want to pay for myself and myself only. I do not want to pay for everyone's healthcare. Just my opinion. And I do not want to spend the next 50 years paying for everyone to go to college. I already paid for myself to go. When I mention to my friends that taxes will go up a ton for us to be paying for free college and healthcare, they think that miraculously that won't happen and the money will just come out of thin air?
They gang up on me and so I just stay quiet. The facebook posts recently have gotten so bad. That if you support him, you support white supremacy, or crooked cops, or racism. I do not support that but I do support Trump. I feel insulted that they are posting such things, because it is directly is affecting me. I keep my mouth shut. I only commented one time, and was instantly ganged up on. I hate that I can't even be upfront and honest with my friends. I feel like I do have to lie all the time and stay quiet. I've told them that I am a republican. But they will say nasty comments out loud about Trump in my presence and I just stay quiet, to avoid a ganged up argument. I also have to hide at work. I work for an organization that is solely liberal in nature, 95% of the workers are liberal. Some of them even have Biden stickers on their office doors. I find this to be in poor professional taste. I don't promote my political views at work. They bash Trump at work and I just sit shaking my head in agreement, when I feel the opposite. I think if I ever actually said what I truly feel, they would find a way to fire me. I'm accepting of everyone democrat or republican if you are a standup good person, but people at work literally say how they hate republicans, just for being one. I think that is wrong.
Does anyone else feel like they have to hide who they are and what they think?
My friends know where I stand, I know where they stand. We don't try and change one another. At the end of the day it's friendship over politics.
Does anyone else feel like they have to hide who they are and what they think?
No.
Depending on the situation, I might CHOOSE to downplay my political opinions, but I sure don't HAVE to.
There are multitudes of people everywhere. Find some new friends, and start spending less time with the ones you - now - disagree with. YOU are the one who has changed. So have the courage of your new convictions, and stop whining because other people haven't changed.
A little background- I, and my family, used to be democrat supporters for a long time. The democrats stood for the lower and middle class, and we felt they wanted to help us. But after many years, we realized we really weren't seeing any change in our lives when they were in office. We made less money, taxes went up, gas prices went up, trade deals were poor, and we then realized we wanted a change. When we learned more about Donald Trump and what he fought for- better trade deals for america- which he's done, less taxes taken out- people keep more of their money in their own pockets, fighting against trafficking drug and child, criminal justice reform, and better healthcare for all including lower prices and more choices, we knew this sounded more for us. Ever since, I have been a huge Trump supporter. I feel and have seen him actually pull through on many of these initiatives and it's very reassuring that he sticks to his word on these important things. This does help all american's in the long run.
This post is not about Trump- so please don't bash me on that. I find that as Americans we should all be entitled to like what we want. America is land of the free for a reason.
What I struggle with now is that all my young friends- I'm 29, are all die hard left supporters. I feel like I have to hide a big part of my personality, my opinion, and who I am, around them because all they do is gang up on you to prove you are wrong, and are constantly post on social media how you are terrible for supporting Trump. Their biggest fighting point is trying to make you feel like a bad person. I know I am not a terrible person, and I don't think my friends terrible for liking democrats. I would never say that. But they judge me on who I like, and I find it very sad. I am a good person, I help people in my community, I have a good job which I take pride in, and I take pride in being American. My friends post on facebook how if you like him you are racist and you support white supremacy. I do not support those things at all. But I do support trump, who has also said he does not support any of that many many times, contrary to popular belief. The first ever execution he put forth was for a white supremacist.
My friends want everything for free- free college, free healthcare, and free free free. I don't agree. I feel like I want to pay for myself and myself only. I do not want to pay for everyone's healthcare. Just my opinion. And I do not want to spend the next 50 years paying for everyone to go to college. I already paid for myself to go. When I mention to my friends that taxes will go up a ton for us to be paying for free college and healthcare, they think that miraculously that won't happen and the money will just come out of thin air?
They gang up on me and so I just stay quiet. The facebook posts recently have gotten so bad. That if you support him, you support white supremacy, or crooked cops, or racism. I do not support that but I do support Trump. I feel insulted that they are posting such things, because it is directly is affecting me. I keep my mouth shut. I only commented one time, and was instantly ganged up on. I hate that I can't even be upfront and honest with my friends. I feel like I do have to lie all the time and stay quiet. I've told them that I am a republican. But they will say nasty comments out loud about Trump in my presence and I just stay quiet, to avoid a ganged up argument. I also have to hide at work. I work for an organization that is solely liberal in nature, 95% of the workers are liberal. Some of them even have Biden stickers on their office doors. I find this to be in poor professional taste. I don't promote my political views at work. They bash Trump at work and I just sit shaking my head in agreement, when I feel the opposite. I think if I ever actually said what I truly feel, they would find a way to fire me. I'm accepting of everyone democrat or republican if you are a standup good person, but people at work literally say how they hate republicans, just for being one. I think that is wrong.
Does anyone else feel like they have to hide who they are and what they think?
If they are actually trying to make you feel bad, that is their personality flaw. They are judgemental.
If you feel bad because your friends have different opinions, that is your flaw. You need to have more security in your own way of thinking. People will have different opinions. We are thinking beings, not automons. We have very good friends who are filled with TDS. They are still good friends. Now, my spouse limits their ability to post their feeds on her Facebook page. That is probably something you should look into. Or moving away from Facebook completely.
I don't hide my opinions from my friends, but I try to avoid politics with those who feel really strongly. They are your friends because you have a lot in common, not because you have everything in common.
Now with acquaintances as opposed to friends, I do keep it quiet. The left has become very judgemental and filled with hatred. It just makes me more determined to vote.
My friends know where I stand, I know where they stand. We don't try and change one another. At the end of the day it's friendship over politics.
Look at the bolded again and really think about it.
Does Friendship flow from both sides? Or only from you to them?
Does friendship include trying to make some feel bad about themselves?
Does friendship include calling people terrible names?
Sounds a lot more like they are attempting to intimidate you into thinking the way they think, believing what they believe.
Things you posted in your original post :
I feel like I have to hide a big part of my personality, my opinion, and who I am, around them because all they do is gang up on you to prove you are wrong, and are constantly post on social media how you are terrible for supporting Trump. Their biggest fighting point is trying to make you feel like a bad person. I know I am not a terrible person, and I don't think my friends terrible for liking democrats. I would never say that. But they judge me on who I like, and I find it very sad. My friends post on facebook how if you like him you are racist and you support white supremacy.
The facebook posts recently have gotten so bad. That if you support him, you support white supremacy, or crooked cops, or racism.
Sorry you are having this problem Mandi, but in your heart you know friends would not do these things to other friends. You have a couple of choices.
1). You can just quite looking at Social Media for your own mental health.
2). You might consider tell these friends that YOU consider them your friends no matter who they support in Elections. YOUR friendship does not depend on a Vote. Ask them directly if they REALLY consider you their friend because they have accused you of terrible things like Racism. Ask them directly if you can only be their friend IF you Vote the way THEY want you to vote. Ask them how they would feel if YOU said terrible things to them because of who they vote for. Finally, ask them what is more important to THEM — your Friendship OR who you Vote for?
Those things might make them really think about how badly they are treating you, AND what’s really important in their lives. I can tell you for sure that true Friendships (the lasting type) is very important in life, but you will have many acquaintances through your life that are not lasting. True Friends remain.
3). It’s often better to ask questions than to attempt to defend your position.
As for work .... the employer sets the rules on conduct, manner of dress, .... many items.
If the employer thinks it’s proper to bring Divisive Politics into the workplace, that is their business.
IF you are harassed because of Politics, you can ignore it or file a complaint, or find a job where you won’t be harassed.... only you can make that decision. A GREAT rule of thumb for everyone including the Employer is to just not bring politics into the workplace. Avoid stress and division wherever you can in your life.
It’s a lot more healthy. Good Luck
I just moved to a rural community and have already formed a small circle of friends with three other women -- we are all retired, over age 65, and live on the same lane. All of them are liberal, and I consider one of them to be almost extremely so. (For example, she doesn't think that anyone should display the U.S. flag as a sign of patriotism, is very outspoken about being in favor of transgender rights, and fervently supports the BLM protesters. The only reason I don't consider her to be an "extremist" is because she does not scream and hurl insults if anyone disagrees with her.) She is the "leader" of the group, and the others mainly nod when she talks, but I don't nod or say anything when politics are brought up unless it concerns a liberal viewpoint that I do agree with -- about 75% of my opinions are "right wing" and about 25% are "left wing". (When we first started walking together and were learning "the basics" about each other, I said that I was a moderate who leans conservative, and none of them 'took issue' with that, but just nodded. They are all very pleasant and polite women.)
So, with me living in such a small community with opportunities for friendship being hard to come by, I think "discretion is the better part of valor", and that works for me. I won't say I agree with, or approve of, something or someone that I don't agree with or approve of, but with times like these -- the political climate of 2020 -- I am not going to risk losing any friendships over a difference of opinion, whether its politics or anything else. If that makes me a coward, so be it.
(However, if these ladies were racist . . . well, in that case, I would disassociate myself from them immediately.)
Last edited by katharsis; 10-04-2020 at 01:34 PM..
What's that rule? Don't talk about politics and religions at the dinner table. I don't talk politics to anyone, but people who know me figure it out eventually. I can only say no so many times to requests to contribute to liberal causes before they figure out where I stand. I am not a republican, but they don't care. If you don't support BLM, Biden, the CCP, you are a racist, a white supremacist, etc.
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