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Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
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If somebody who had molested a child a couple of times (let's say the details are unimportant but it did not involve lasting physical injuries), after doing his time (and surviving in jail), sincerely repented and swore that he would never do it again, do you think you could personally ever forgive him? And do you think he deserves forgiveness? Assuming you could believe he would never do it. I guess they're slighted related questions.
While I'm as shocked by child abuse as anybody, the way in which they are beyond forgiveness and are hated, more than mass murderers or serial killers, is slightly disturbing. Actually what I'm more concerned about is the witch-hunt/hysterical attitude. Many people guilty of lesser crimes (i.e. consensual sex with say a 14 year old minor, or even something as minor as accidentally exposing yourself to children without intent) are often given the same tag. I don't have children so I can't say what I'd do if it happened to one of my own children, but I'd like to think if they have truly turned away there's a place for forgiveness for everybody.
I understand there are countless people who've been abused or have a love one who has been, and I think it's totally understandable to never be able to forgive. I'm not saying you're a lesser person. Nor, I think, should those who do forgive be made to feel guilty or that they condone or tolerate pedophilia.
I guess what it comes down to is: should they be shot/locked away forever, even if it was just one time, or should they be 'rehabilitated?' I mean like a murderer or rapist you never REALLY know, which is the disturbing part, but then again there are pedophiles lurking around who haven't committed an offence yet. I guess even if it's a 'sexual orientation' it's not one that society can tolerate, so maybe they could be given a chemical that removes their desire or castrated?
We don't know what causes pedophilia nor do we know what to do to fix it. ..
we don't even know how many people out there have these urges, yet don't act on them
If something happens to your child/daughter/son than sure, you can forgive them. That is up to you, and your grace.
society on the other hand.. .doesn't know what to do with it. Of course, according to studies Meghan's Law has no real impact. . .so marking them on Google Maps isn't useful
For all crimes like this: pediophilia, murder, rape, etc
In a perfect world, I think Castration should be the standard punishment. Of course, that Castration should not just be the offender but any first generation family members (i.e. brothers, sons, fathers). The reasoning is pretty simple - evolution awards rape/etc. . .so lets use science to get evolution back on track.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,054,732 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChrisFromChicago
What does forgiveness intail?
We don't know what causes pedophilia nor do we know what to do to fix it. ..
we don't even know how many people out there have these urges, yet don't act on them
If something happens to your child/daughter/son than sure, you can forgive them. That is up to you, and your grace.
society on the other hand.. .doesn't know what to do with it. Of course, according to studies Meghan's Law has no real impact. . .so marking them on Google Maps isn't useful
For all crimes like this: pediophilia, murder, rape, etc
In a perfect world, I think Castration should be the standard punishment. Of course, that Castration should not just be the offender but any first generation family members (i.e. brothers, sons, fathers). The reasoning is pretty simple - evolution awards rape/etc. . .so lets use science to get evolution back on track.
"Child molestation" can mean all kinds of things: An 18-year old getting a BJ at a party from a 16-year old, for example. In some states, "child molestation" can be something rather unrelated to the stereotypical idea of what it should be. In Georgia, for example, a person will be branded a "child molester" if he committed a crime (any crime) during which he restricted the free movement of a minor. Thus, if a person breaks into a house, ties up the occupants (including a minor), he is a "child molester" for the rest of his life...
I am also not quite sure how long that stigma needs to be attached to a person. Let's say that he committed a crime that labels him "child molester" at the age of 18. Do I still judge him when he is 55 and hasn't done anything against the law in the meantime?
If somebody who had molested a child a couple of times (let's say the details are unimportant but it did not involve lasting physical injuries), after doing his time (and surviving in jail), sincerely repented and swore that he would never do it again, do you think you could personally ever forgive him? And do you think he deserves forgiveness? Assuming you could believe he would never do it. I guess they're slighted related questions.
While I'm as shocked by child abuse as anybody, the way in which they are beyond forgiveness and are hated, more than mass murderers or serial killers, is slightly disturbing. Actually what I'm more concerned about is the witch-hunt/hysterical attitude. Many people guilty of lesser crimes (i.e. consensual sex with say a 14 year old minor, or even something as minor as accidentally exposing yourself to children without intent) are often given the same tag. I don't have children so I can't say what I'd do if it happened to one of my own children, but I'd like to think if they have truly turned away there's a place for forgiveness for everybody.
I understand there are countless people who've been abused or have a love one who has been, and I think it's totally understandable to never be able to forgive. I'm not saying you're a lesser person. Nor, I think, should those who do forgive be made to feel guilty or that they condone or tolerate pedophilia.
I guess what it comes down to is: should they be shot/locked away forever, even if it was just one time, or should they be 'rehabilitated?' I mean like a murderer or rapist you never REALLY know, which is the disturbing part, but then again there are pedophiles lurking around who haven't committed an offence yet. I guess even if it's a 'sexual orientation' it's not one that society can tolerate, so maybe they could be given a chemical that removes their desire or castrated?
The man had an egg-sized brain tumor pressing on the right frontal lobe. When surgeons removed it, the lewd behavior and pedophilia faded away. Exactly why, the surgeons cannot quite explain.
The sudden and uncontrollable paedophilia exhibited by a 40-year-old man was caused by an egg-sized brain tumour, his doctors have told a scientific conference. And once the tumour had been removed, his sex-obsession disappeared.
Forgive? Yes. Forget? Never. I would never leave them alone with a child. I do question how much of a "child abuser" an 18 year old who had sex with 15 or 16 year old is. Or in a case where the child claimed to be an adult and a reasonable person would think they were one by appearance.
That would depend upon te situation. 45 year old man molesting a 9 yearold? Never
17 yearold and a 16 yearold in a consentual relationship? yes
Priest and the alterboy? Never
Okay, first, I was molested as a child for 3 years. I forgave my abuser, in part because as I got older and snippets of conversations came back, I realized that he himself had been abused (or was actively being abused at that time) he was an older teen babysitter. I also forgave him...for me, to take my power back
Secondly, it is a myth that recidivism is as high as they say...in reality according to the DOJ, it's between 3-5% and you have to remember that pedophilia is a diagnosis, not all "child molesters" are pedophiles
A lot of things factor into "actual" recidivism (vs, catching a charge for say failure to report and it being counted in as another sex charge...LE sometimes plays fast and loose with their definitions)
Some factors, are situational...was alcohol involved? other factors include was the victim related, was the victim male or female, age, relationship etc
Did they get therapy?
Again, it's also a myth that therapy doesn't work on child molesters...its true it's less likely to work on those with a diagnosis of pedophilia...but otherwise it does work well for others
The point is, it's not cut and dried, and not easy to answer in black and white
Current research is showing that child molesters (as opposed to the term "sex offenders", which covers a lot of different things not just child molesters) if given proper support from family and community being able to find and hold a job, find housing, get therapy, are FAR FAR less likely to re-offend, and that makes everyone safer.
Unfortunately, a lot of our "feel good laws' like residency restrictions, Megan's law etc. don't actually help anything, and actually work against the stability the "offender" needs.
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Could you ever forgive a pedophile? Are they deserving of forgiveness?
