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I think the point is we have men claiming to be in a crisis because they feel oppressed that they no longer have the entire field by default. In describing their crisis, it is women who they see as the culprits: Only 40% of men go to college, there are losing out to women there in a big way. Women with degrees dont marry men who dont have degrees. Men are violent because women wont have sex with them. These were the talking points. But it was women who were oppressed.
Until 1974 women could not get loans without a male signature, among other social and legal things. Men never experienced that due to their sex. But now that the playing field is equal they are somehow oppressed and in crisis.
It must be sad and lonely to live your life so insecure and defensive.
Mystery attracts. Splurging all your details early on gives someone an early opportunity to evaluate you as a resume rather than actually evaluating you, in the flesh, right in front of them. I don't mind telling people what I do and talk about it a bit, but I run for the hills when I get the sense I'm being interviewed for a job on the first date. Talk about vibe killing.
This actually made me laugh out loud!!! It's true that modern women don't generally NEED a man's status, resources, or protection anymore. Don't you see what this means? Men don't have to second guess if they are only being used for their wealth. Modern men and women are free to simply enjoy each other's company, explore interests, passion, and love, but for this to happen, men have to have a pleasing personality, interests, and more manners than can be found in Mom's basement. So many here see relationships as transactions, but that is old fashioned thinking.
Exactly. It should be a good thing that couples can be equal partners. They can couple because they love each other and make each other happy and hopefully they complement each other and can build a stable healthy relationship together.
I'm not sure why some see it as such a contentious competition. Its almost as their going in as enemies. It seems so exhausting and pointless.
Mystery attracts. Splurging all your details early on gives someone an early opportunity to evaluate you as a resume rather than actually evaluating you, in the flesh, right in front of them. I don't mind telling people what I do and talk about it a bit, but I run for the hills when I get the sense I'm being interviewed for a job on the first date. Talk about vibe killing.
Well naturally there is a difference between telling someone what you do for a living and being interrogated. I dont know why some are so guarded of how they earn a living, are they ashamed or do they think their paycheck is all that?
People certainly do that. I prefer a man who is secure enough in himself to be honest.
I have dated all sorts of men with all sorts of careers. One's job, to me, really dosen't matter. Maybe, hired assassin, politician, funeral director is kind of creepy.
Women are not rejecting men because they're not good looking enough, or because they're not tall enough, or because they're not rich or high status enough. Women are simply less interested in men than ever before, and that disinterest is continually growing. A large and growing proportion of women do not want sex with men, they do not want relationships with men, they do not even want men anywhere near them
Meanwhile, men are more desperate for female sex, affection, and companionship than ever before. They have been reduced to creatures more resembling of well trained domestic dogs begging at the feet of their masters for scraps, than men. How will this pathological imbalance play out, we will have to just wait and see.
Where in the world are you seeing this.
I do see there are more gay, lesbian, bi, etc. today who are not interested in the opposite sex, but I believe that is fairly equal between the sexes.
Also, both men and women are marrying and starting families later in life but I see men and women interested in one another, dating, marrying. Good grief, my grand recently graduated high school, I have had him since 6th grade and in all that time all the bf/gf drama of he and his friends. Kids are definitely liking one another. Even my great nieces and nephews have "gf/bfs" in kindergarten and third grade. I cant count the weddings among the college and newly graduated young people and nearly all of them have mates.
Where are people seeing these hordes of desperate sexless men?
It's not really as simple as men not being first by default.
There has been a somewhat understated push to downplay masculinity, been going on for a while now.
Toxic femininity isn't a term you hear. I get the argument that men commit the majority crimes, war, etc etc.
The problem appears to be the lack of male leadership for young men. We need strong tough and agressive when needeed men. Grown men like fathers, teachers, coaches need to guide and provide direction and teach men how to corral their aggression and urges.
Strong men are needed.
What I wrote was paraphrased for the linked video about men being in crises. I totally agree, what we are seeing today is not as simple as men not being first but in the video that is how it is represented. Why not discuss the points you made. I agree strong men are needed especially in the leadership of boys and young men? Where are they? It seems to me every time I hear men discussing the issue of masculinity and changing gender rolls they focus on the cause being women instead of discussing how men can change the direction in a positive way.
Do you think that the epitome of masculinity historically was somewhat pushed on all men. I recall the days of boys being ridiculed if they were not tough, didn't like sports, violence, rough and tumble, etc. They were call little girls if they showed any softness or emotion. Perhaps some middle ground needs to be explored so ALL men dont feel like they have to be exactly one way to be seen as masculine.
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