Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
If the problem is internal, an external change will not fix the internal problem. We ultimately can't escape ourselves, aka "wherever you go, there you are."
Sometimes these internal issues magnify anything negative happening around us, making it very tough to cope.
If the issue is only living in the wrong environment then a move to a more suitable place could certainly help.
Often it is more complicated than that.
I am looking at either Mombasa or Kisumu, Kenya, as a primary option, and Tanzania as a secondary option. I am well aware that the grass might not be greener. I will take that risk. I have been watching videos of a YouTuber lately who has the same dislike for living in America as I do. He has traveled extensively to many different countries and has confirmed that life is indeed much better elsewhere (including in Kenya. In fact, Kenya is this guy's favorite country out of the ones he has been to).
Everytime I go out, it is as if things get a little worse. American society is becoming more atomized, polarized, isolated, mean-spirited, sadistic, could, untrustworthy, corrupted, obese, disgusting...... by the day. We will probably have a civil war soon, before 2030, that will completely and totally rip what is left of this country to shreds. No, nothing will ever get better, and it is best to get off this fast sinking ship.
I am at the point in my life where I really need to try something drastic, otherwise the negative feelings and emotions might just overwhelm me, pull me under.
I might suggest an old axiom that may be useful for you to ponder a bit …. “Wherever you go, there you are”.
In other words, your outside world is a reflection of your inner world, so when one’s innner world is in a state of discord, it doesn’t much matter if you are seated in a dentist chair, or a seat at the movie theater. So, changing the outside environment may appear to offer an immediate improvement, due to novelty, it might not be long before the flaws in the new environment replace the old.
And something else might also be wise to reflect on … that is, we all tend to see exactly we are looking for, or what we expect to see. I’m not trying to sound overly esoteric or woo woo new age here, but the desert southwest might appear desolate to one person, while immensely beautiful to another. One may only see sand and lifelessness, while another sees flowering cacti and amazing sunsets.
It’s particularly troubling to read “America is truly a terrible country for everything except making money. I have not one nice thing to say about America or its people.. That’s pretty drastic, and it suggests the presence of repressed rage, or at least a worrisome level of extreme dissatisfaction. That type of internal distress is not healthy, and can consume you.
Truthfully, we’ve all had to endure some challenging times over the past few years, and many are suffering the after effects of the stress imposed. It hasn’t exactly been an easy time for most people, while more difficult for some than for others to be sure. But even at my darkest moments, and there have been quite a few over the past dozen years, I cannot recall ever feeling that I couldn’t find something positive, somewhere. Some small blessing, or the obscure silver lining in one of the clouds. Sometimes it takes a bit of searching, but they are there. You just have to look for them.
Typically I don’t discuss my own personal issues because they are personal, and because nobody really cares anyway, LOL, but for some reason I feel it might be helpful to do so in this instance. I’ll skip the details, and offer a brief synopsis … over the past 15 years, beginning with a total loss of everything from a fire in 2009, which included a business that was just launched, followed three years later by another total loss of everything from a very nasty divorce. A brief lull period was followed by one more failed relationship, and a year later, Covid, which turned my professional industry on it’s ear, resulting in a 70% reduction in income culminating in two total losses, and one substantial loss in just a 10 year period. So, I threw up my hands in surrender, and retired. Had a quiet following year, then had a heart attack that took me out of action for a while, followed shortly after by being t-boned by a student driver at 45 mph in a nasty wreck that I’m lucky to have survived. That was less than a year ago. So, that’s a roller coaster ride if ever there was one! You might think I’m embellishing or making this up, and I wish I was … but that’s right …. 2 total financial losses, 2 lost businesses, 1 almost total loss of income, two failed relationships, and 2 close encounters with near death, over the past 14 years.
So, the reason why I’m sharing this is that if I hadn’t developed some valuable coping skills along the way, I probably wouldn’t even be here to share this with you .
Trust me when I tell you that you can absolutely find something to be thankful for, even in the darkest of times. Your thoughts become your beliefs, because that is what a belief is … just a thought you keep thinking. And you are 100% in total control of what thoughts you choose to think. And if you are thinking negative thoughts, you can change that in an instant. And even if your current circumstances make finding something to be thankful for too difficult, let your mind go back in time to a moment in the past when you were happy and joyful. Surely there were moments like that, at some point in time. And instantly, you’ll raise your energy levels to a higher vibration.
The trick is to monitor one’s internal dialog. That conversation we have with ourselves can either be positive or negative. Negative thoughts produce negative experiences, because that is where your awareness is directed. The same is true in the reverse.
Not to be mistaken as a criticism …. just go back to your original post, and realize that isn’t a conversation you really want to be having with yourself. And nobody is forcing you to have it. You can change that conversation anytime you choose to, to something more positive and more uplifting. And if you dedicate yourself to practice monitoring your thoughts, and consciously choosing to set aside the negative, and replace them with more positive ones, it will eventually become a habit that will bring a river of rewards.
America is only good for consumerism- and I am not into consumerism. Money- beyond what you need to cover the basics, has diminishing returns. Excess money is just the icing on the cake, not the cake itself. America is a terribly isolating place- and if you are living an isolated life, you will quickly find that having an overflowing bank account means nothing.
Sounds like you're struggling where you live to build relationships. Instead of writing off the entire country perhaps you can look at moving to another part of it that is a better fit.
Blanket statements about such a huge, diverse country as this really just sound more like frustration instead of a logical assessment. It may very well be that your core problem may not be solved by going to another country.
Regardless, I hope you find happiness but maybe sit down and write a list of what you want and then a list of what you need to do to attain that and it may help with clarity of direction and planning.
I have to question better medical care in Asia than the US. Cheaper? No doubt. But when is cheaper ever better when it comes to something as important as your health?
Hong Kong, Macao, Japan and Singapore all have an average lifespan of over 84 years, the average US lifespan is 76 years old, which is better?
The unhealth system in the USA is designed to get everyone obese with cancer and heart problems followed by pills and injections followed by amputations followed by death, I've opted out so far with a BMI of 20.8, BP of 105/60, no pills, and 8% bodyfat in my 60's.
Well, I have been flirting with this idea for several months now, but I think I have just about made up my mind. It is time for me to leave. America is truly a terrible country for everything except making money. I have not one nice thing to say about America or its people. Once I accumulate enough resources, I'm gone.
Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam, Philippines - I'm sure the USD will go for miles. Unfortunately, you may also end up a target for the locals because rich or not that's how many will see you. And compared to many.. you are rich.
Now, I lived in Tokyo for three decades but Tokyo isn't cheap and you'll need money. The Japanese have no problem deporting for dead-beat gaijins (foreigners) lickety-split.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Taggerung
I am looking at either Mombasa or Kisumu, Kenya, as a primary option, and Tanzania as a secondary option. I am well aware that the grass might not be greener. I will take that risk.
Again, the worry with living in much poor countries is how the locals may see you - you're a rich westerner. This can bring about its own problems. I’ve known a few westerners who returned home one day to find their young pretty wife or a business partner had clean out their bank account and disappeared.
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilyflower3191981
I have posted this in your previous thread, this is another kind reminder that grass might not be greener on the other side.
So true. No matter where you go - you take yourself with you.
Average lifespan of Asians is higher even if they don't live in Asia. Anyone who is obese needs mainly to look in the mirror, not at the health care system. No one can "make you" eat food, just you.
Hong Kong, Macao, Japan and Singapore all have an average lifespan of over 84 years, the average US lifespan is 76 years old, which is better?
The unhealth system in the USA is designed to get everyone obese with cancer and heart problems followed by pills and injections followed by amputations followed by death, I've opted out so far with a BMI of 20.8, BP of 105/60, no pills, and 8% bodyfat in my 60's.
Those places don't support legions of people stuck in self selected doom loops of destructive behaviors.
Don’t go “out of the frying pan and into the fire.”
If you think the US is corrupt and dysfunctional, just want until you move to Africa!
Humans are humans. There’s always going to be corruption and dysfunction, no matter where you go.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
.