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Old 07-21-2009, 05:57 PM
 
983 posts, read 3,588,043 times
Reputation: 431

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Quote:
Originally Posted by natalayjones View Post
I agree; I loved my natural hair when I was younger because I didn't have to do it My mom would do my hair Saturday night and it would last the whole week; when I got older and wanted more stylish hair, I started going to a salon (my parents were still paying for it) and my mom would wrap it for me at night.

But when I got to college, I just didn't have the time (or the money) to keep up with the maintenance or buy the products. I'm not against natural hair and I actually preferred mine because it was so full and thick, but I'll probably never go back to it unless I can afford to go to the salon regularly and buy the products I like.

My decision didn't have anything to do with my acknowledgment or rejection of my African roots - it had everything to do with how much time and money I wanted to invest on my hair.
I know someone who experienced the exact opposite. She started wearing her hair natural because during college she didn't have the time and money for her relaxed hair (touch ups, etc.).
In a way, she was compelled to learn to deal with her natural hair herself, and she did, quite successfully.
Like you though, her decision had nothing to do with her acknowledgment of her African roots or such.
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Old 07-22-2009, 07:10 AM
 
Location: Orlando, FL
12,200 posts, read 18,314,856 times
Reputation: 6655
Quote:
Originally Posted by NewYorkBorn View Post
Exactly. They want to shoot the messenger because the messenger is saying something they don't want to hear or admit.
I think it has more to do with the way the message is being delivered. I intially asked you a question, you responded and I disagreed. You basically came back and told me I may "think" I'm relaxing my hair because it's easier for me to take care of but you know the "truth" about my real reasons.

Quote:
Originally Posted by NewYorkBorn View Post
But it is obvious that many of us should take a trip to Africa so we can gain our dignity back as black people and stop walking around here in a trance that the white man put us in! On that note it is obvious you are a child..........I am a grown a-- woman and don't have time for children! The first three letters of the word ignorant is IGNORE!
I never questioned your age...but I'm glad that you know how to spell both ignorant and Ignore - I'm a big advocate for literacy.

Oh and that button next to the quote button will allow you to reply to several comments at once.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Neutre View Post
I know someone who experienced the exact opposite. She started wearing her hair natural because during college she didn't have the time and money for her relaxed hair (touch ups, etc.).
In a way, she was compelled to learn to deal with her natural hair herself, and she did, quite successfully.
Like you though, her decision had nothing to do with her acknowledgment of her African roots or such.
My mom is like your friend. We were living in a dry climate (NM) and it was causing her relaxed her to break so she had to keep going to the salon to get deep oil treatments, etc. and it was being costly and timely so she chopped it all off and has been natural since then.

I've always thought it was just a cosmetic choice, just like shaving your legs, arching your eye brows, painting your fingernails, etc.

Last edited by nat_at772; 07-22-2009 at 07:47 AM..
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Old 07-22-2009, 09:40 AM
 
Location: ...within the Smile of His Heart!
529 posts, read 1,333,916 times
Reputation: 1789
Natalay, what you say make sense to me. No one
questions White people enjoyment of tanning, or
accusing a White person of wishing to be Black
because of a love of tanned skin or tanning beds.

Also there is no pressure for White people to go
with the natural texture of hair {closer to the
texture of "straw"} oppose to shiny and silky or "curls".
White people spend a lot of money for a shiny
silky/curly hair look and tanned skin. It is inconvenient
attempting to style and keep neat, straw textured
hair.

Why we should view Black people's concept of
their own beautification, as being anti-Black I
will never understand. Maybe America has many
ghosts still lurking in their people subconscious,
from an ignorant time.
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Old 07-22-2009, 10:58 AM
 
Location: New York City
1,556 posts, read 3,533,191 times
Reputation: 944
I just love when people try to simplify things that are not that simple by trying to compare white people's practices with black people. The last time I checked white people were not the victims of 400 years of systematic racism.......therefore the choices white people make can not be compared to the choices African Americans make! Or could it be that we don't want to face our own short comings as a racial group so whenever we are called out we use white people's behavior as a crutch to take the focus off of ourselves?

The systematic racism of African people is what has brought about our hair choices, choice to bleach our skin, have plastic surgery on our noses and the other choices that African Americans make today. Therefore we can not simply say "oh well the white woman does it, so I guess it is ok for me to do it too"! If every white person in the world jumps off of a bridge......does that mean African American people should follow them with that practice too? This is why the black community is so screwed up today.........many of us can not think for ourselves and feel we must follow the crowd and the white man/woman's example on how to live life.

This is yet another weak argument that black people use when we don't want to deal with our own ignorance. The person who started this thread chose to discuss black people hating their own skin color.....the topic of this thread is not about what white women do to their bodies, so why on earth are we using white people as a scapegoat when discussing a black community topic?

One thing is for sure......at least when white women alter their hair texture it is still recognizable to the way their natural hair looks. When black women decide to alter (relax) our natural hair.........the end result looks completely un-natural and does not even remotely resemble what our natural hair is supposed to look like.

White people were born with white skin and straight hair texture........we were not. Therefore to alter the way we were born just to fit in to american society is the slave mind. I see black women all the time with badly damaged hair, hair loss around the hair line and yet in spite of the damage they will keep using chemicals on their hair!

Personally I could care less about what others choose to do with their bodies or their level of consciousness regarding the reasons they are making these choices for their body. But nobody on here is going to silence me.......just like everyone else is on here sharing their views I am going to share my views too.


YouTube - The Truth ABOUT Hair Relaxers
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Old 07-22-2009, 11:05 AM
miu
 
Location: MA/NH
17,758 posts, read 40,016,529 times
Reputation: 18034
Quote:
Originally Posted by shyangel View Post
Natalay, what you say make sense to me. No one
questions White people enjoyment of tanning, or
accusing a White person of wishing to be Black
because of a love of tanned skin or tanning beds.
Not really. There have been many posts suggested that white people tan because they want to be black or some other non-white race... what they just want is to not be pasty white in the summertime. I think that most just want their skin to be a nice golden brown colour. And it also implies having the leisure time and the means to sun bathe, ideally on a beautiful secluded beach.

And as an Asian, I've had non-Asian women express to me a desire to be skinny and petite looking as an Asian, but no one has ever actually told me that they wanted to be an Asian woman. It's normal to admire the best physical features of what you don't have. It's also that part of our modern day society's pressure on women to be a perfect 10 in looks in order to be considered a successful woman.
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Old 07-22-2009, 11:09 AM
 
Location: Near Manito
20,170 posts, read 24,237,000 times
Reputation: 15284
I remember the first time I read the Autobiography of Malcolm X (edited by Alex Haley), many years ago. As a white man, I was stunned by his description of the "conk" process he underwent to straighten his hair.

For the first time, I was afforded an insight into the pain and self-degredation black people routinely underwent to fit the stereotypes of attractiveness in a majoirty caucasian culture. I also got a lesson in perspective on the "racism" of the Nation of Islam and its appeal to men like Malcolm, who in their anger and frsutration were really reacting as any man would who had been demeaned and oppressed by the bigotry of America in the 1940s, 50s, and 60s.

The conversation in this thread brought back memories of that book to me. I still consider it one of the most important books I have ever read. It was painful reading, and it made me squirm as a white person, as it impressed on me what it really meant to be black in the days before the Civil Rights movement.

I wish it were required reading in American schools.
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Old 07-22-2009, 11:22 AM
 
Location: ...within the Smile of His Heart!
529 posts, read 1,333,916 times
Reputation: 1789
Beauty always had its dangers. There are plenty
of White Women who have been scarred by plastic
surgery. Are White Women trying to be Black to have
sensual lips, bigger breast, rounder/fuller hips or
ever accused as such? No.

Motivations are personal. Opinions are too. A different
one does not cancel another. If a woman's degree of
effort to attain a goal, defined as beautiful, appear
less extreme because of biology in one regard and
extreme in another, doesn't mean it is an attempt to
eradicate race. To assume so is indicative of racial
indoctrination not the lack of one.

I choose not to regard women who select their personal
standard of attainment {beauty} as a selection based
on nothing other than what appeals to them at that
time. I will always choose to see it as a choice and not
indicative of them trying to be another race.

I will not seek to change another's view on this, only to
present my own and represent those of such a view as my own.

It can remain as simple or as complex as one receives
it to be.

Last edited by shyangel; 07-22-2009 at 11:44 AM..
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Old 07-22-2009, 11:23 AM
 
Location: Philly, Philly
932 posts, read 1,672,588 times
Reputation: 332
Quote:
Originally Posted by NewYorkBorn View Post
I just love when people try to simplify things that are not that simple by trying to compare white people's practices with black people. The last time I checked white people were not the victims of 400 years of systematic racism.......therefore the choices white people make can not be compared to the choices African Americans make! Or could it be that we don't want to face our own short comings as a racial group so whenever we are called out we use white people's behavior as a crutch to take the focus off of ourselves?

The systematic racism of African people is what has brought about our hair choices, choice to bleach our skin, have plastic surgery on our noses and the other choices that African Americans make today. Therefore we can not simply say "oh well the white woman does it, so I guess it is ok for me to do it too"! If every white person in the world jumps off of a bridge......does that mean African American people should follow them with that practice too? This is why the black community is so screwed up today.........many of us can not think for ourselves and feel we must follow the crowd and the white man/woman's example on how to live life.

This is yet another weak argument that black people use when we don't want to deal with our own ignorance. The person who started this thread chose to discuss black people hating their own skin color.....the topic of this thread is not about what white women do to their bodies, so why on earth are we using white people as a scapegoat when discussing a black community topic?

One thing is for sure......at least when white women alter their hair texture it is still recognizable to the way their natural hair looks. When black women decide to alter (relax) our natural hair.........the end result looks completely un-natural and does not even remotely resemble what our natural hair is supposed to look like.

White people were born with white skin and straight hair texture........we were not. Therefore to alter the way we were born just to fit in to american society is the slave mind. I see black women all the time with badly damaged hair, hair loss around the hair line and yet in spite of the damage they will keep using chemicals on their hair!

Personally I could care less about what others choose to do with their bodies or their level of consciousness regarding the reasons they are making these choices for their body. But nobody on here is going to silence me.......just like everyone else is on here sharing their views I am going to share my views too.
I wish that we would stop thinking that every black person is the same or has had the same history. We are different; some of us have white ancestors and some of us have native american ancestors. So how can many of us mixed blacks have a slave mind?

My natural hair isn't kinky or curly, its naturally straight with waves so I guess I'm outside of the "black" norm right there.

Some of us choose not to have a slave mind or blame racism for everything in our lives...
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Old 07-22-2009, 11:29 AM
 
Location: ...within the Smile of His Heart!
529 posts, read 1,333,916 times
Reputation: 1789
Quote:
Originally Posted by miu View Post
Not really. There have been many posts suggested that white people tan because they want to be black or some other non-white race...
such posts are wrong...

Quote:
Originally Posted by miu View Post
what they just want is to not be pasty white in the summertime. I think that most just want their skin to be a nice golden brown colour. And it also implies having the leisure time and the means to sun bathe, ideally on a beautiful secluded beach.
this is correct.

Quote:
Originally Posted by miu View Post
And as an Asian, I've had non-Asian women express to me a desire to be skinny and petite looking as an Asian, but no one has ever actually told me that they wanted to be an Asian woman.
This is my point exactly. The desire to be skinny could
be made to appear as an attempt to be Asian. That
would be incorrect would it not, though if judging by
appearance, such a point would appear correct.

Quote:
Originally Posted by miu View Post
It's normal to admire the best physical features of what you don't have. It's also that part of our modern day society's pressure on women to be a perfect 10 in looks in order to be considered a successful woman.
I agree if the meaning is to attract success to you.
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Old 07-22-2009, 11:40 AM
 
Location: New York City
1,556 posts, read 3,533,191 times
Reputation: 944
Quote:
Originally Posted by LoveMiiorHateMii View Post
I wish that we would stop thinking that every black person is the same or has had the same history. We are different; some of us have white ancestors and some of us have native american ancestors. So how can many of us mixed blacks have a slave mind?

My natural hair isn't kinky or curly, its naturally straight with waves so I guess I'm outside of the "black" norm right there.

Some of us choose not to have a slave mind or blame racism for everything in our lives...

As you said you have naturally straight hair with waves.......therefore your perspective of the situation is going to be different. Therefore you do not share the black experience of those that have kinky hair and having someone brainwash you into thinking that you need to change your natural hair in order to fit in! I am one who has both Native American (Cherokee) blood as well as some white blood (Grandfather) this does not mean that I have not been a victim of the slave mind and a lack of consciousness about self. I don't care if it is 2009.........we can not PRETEND like what has happened to African Americans in the past are not STILL HAPPENING TO US TODAY!

You are entitled to your opinion and I am entitled to mine!

Last edited by NewYorkBorn; 07-22-2009 at 12:50 PM..
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