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You don't know their reasons why. You only ASSUME why and then attack that. I have the highest admiration for anybody who adopts a child, regardless of where they are from. You seem to want to attack those for doing a good thing, drawing up boundaries, making childish assumptions, and concluding with some sort of America first non sense.
You certainly don't seem like the type of person who would have the compassion or integrity to adopt a child anyway.
Considering I will be starting graduate school for social work in a few months, with a dream of working in foster care, I would say yes, I do have the compassion and integrity to adopt a child. I am certainly happy for any child who is adopted, but I also think there are thousands of children in our own country who need homes just as bad as those in other countries. My assumptions are not childish. When you see Angelina Jolie and Madonna adopting all of these children from foreign countries, it makes one wonder why the hell they didnt look to American children? They can afford to pick and choose where they get their child, and then once they get the kid here they give it a f*cking mohawk and call it "Pax". I have a strong sense of nationalism and I think that our country should come first before we lend a hand to another. I want child citizens of the United States to be put into loving homes in this country before some Ethiopian. I understand the difficulty of adopting an American child, but I think people should at least try here first before moving on to a foreign country.
Considering I will be starting graduate school for social work in a few months, with a dream of working in foster care, I would say yes, I do have the compassion and integrity to adopt a child. I am certainly happy for any child who is adopted, but I also think there are thousands of children in our own country who need homes just as bad as those in other countries. My assumptions are not childish. When you see Angelina Jolie and Madonna adopting all of these children from foreign countries, it makes one wonder why the hell they didnt look to American children? They can afford to pick and choose where they get their child, and then once they get the kid here they give it a f*cking mohawk and call it "Pax". I have a strong sense of nationalism and I think that our country should come first before we lend a hand to another. I want child citizens of the United States to be put into loving homes in this country before some Ethiopian. I understand the difficulty of adopting an American child, but I think people should at least try here first before moving on to a foreign country.
I think most people who adopt (knowing several who have) try to go the American route until they get stymied. It is very expensive to adopt a foreign child, even if it is easier.
Considering I will be starting graduate school for social work in a few months, with a dream of working in foster care, I would say yes, I do have the compassion and integrity to adopt a child. I am certainly happy for any child who is adopted, but I also think there are thousands of children in our own country who need homes just as bad as those in other countries. My assumptions are not childish. When you see Angelina Jolie and Madonna adopting all of these children from foreign countries, it makes one wonder why the hell they didnt look to American children? They can afford to pick and choose where they get their child, and then once they get the kid here they give it a f*cking mohawk and call it "Pax". I have a strong sense of nationalism and I think that our country should come first before we lend a hand to another. I want child citizens of the United States to be put into loving homes in this country before some Ethiopian. I understand the difficulty of adopting an American child, but I think people should at least try here first before moving on to a foreign country.
And since when is it your personal business if one decides to adopt internationally?
Considering I will be starting graduate school for social work in a few months, with a dream of working in foster care, I would say yes, I do have the compassion and integrity to adopt a child. I am certainly happy for any child who is adopted, but I also think there are thousands of children in our own country who need homes just as bad as those in other countries. My assumptions are not childish. When you see Angelina Jolie and Madonna adopting all of these children from foreign countries, it makes one wonder why the hell they didnt look to American children? They can afford to pick and choose where they get their child, and then once they get the kid here they give it a f*cking mohawk and call it "Pax". I have a strong sense of nationalism and I think that our country should come first before we lend a hand to another. I want child citizens of the United States to be put into loving homes in this country before some Ethiopian. I understand the difficulty of adopting an American child, but I think people should at least try here first before moving on to a foreign country.
Actually the one who got the mohawk was Maddox. And I'll reiterate by saying there are millions of children world-wide who need homes, not just here. I don't give a flying frick where someone adopts a child from, it's awesome enough that they're adopting. There are needful kids everywhere...surely you realize that perhaps those kids stuck in the system in other countries will never get out because the average income of people is so low that they would never be able to adopt one of those kids? Would you rather have them languish in the system, just like they do here? I'd say that's a pretty darn ignorant & selfish thing to think.
Location: The Chatterdome in La La Land, CaliFUNia
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LML
Well, I can't speak for everyone but I will speak for the ones that I know about.
1. My sister and brother in law adopted a baby from India 30 years ago. She is grown, married, has two little ones, and is a nurse now. They adopted from India because they could have no children, wanted the experience of raising a child from infancy, and were on waiting lists for so long that they had finally realized that they would "age out" of adoptive age if they didn't adopt soon. It turned out wonderfully.
2. A friend and her husband adopted a 2 year old boy who had been removed by the courts from his birth mother because she was a drug addicted prostitute who had left him alone for days at a time. 3 days before the adoption would have been final the mother changed her mind about signing the final papers, found a sympathetic judge, and had the adoption set aside. The court returned that sweet little boy to the nightmare in which he had been living before. Why did they go overseas? Because they would not go through that again.
3. Another friend and her husband have been trying to adopt for years. They have jumped through every hoop possible and were trying to adopt a child that was in the foster system. They made it very clear that they were willing to adopt an older child, didn't care about race, didn't care about gender, just wanted to give a child a loving, beautiful, stable home. They were told that since they are now in their early 40s, haven't had a child, and are white, they were not appropriate parents for a child of a different race or a child who might have problems that they would not know how to deal with since they were childless. So, no child for them. So why would they NOT adopt from overseas when the system made it impossible for them to give a home to any of the thousands of children in need of that home.
Until the system in this country starts making adoption actually work for the child instead of for preconceived ideas of social workers it just makes sense for people with so much love to give to give it to those they are allowed to love.
The whole foster care system is definitely NOT looking out for the children's best interests. With BS such as this, it's no wonder why so many children are languishing in the system. You'd have to jump over major hurdles just to even have a shot at adoption. The whole crap about not allowing children to be adopted by families of a different race makes my blood boil given that I was fortunate enough to have been adopted by a family of a different race. Why can't other children have the same option?
I know this an old thread but too many people making foolish statement filled with errors.
1) It is not easier to adopt overseas than America. In fact it is about 100 time harder. Remember you are dealing with two different languages, governments(one can be communist), cultures, attitudes about adoption, lots of unethical people involved in overseas adoptiong, stack and stacks of paperwork all in triplicate needing useless stamps, bribes and off the wall fees, etc. Overseas adoptions are a nightmare and many people have had thousands of dollars scammed and now waiting times are unreal and in some cases children are ill yet the prospective parents are lied to.
2) There are not millions of adoptable children in America. Yes there are many kids in foster care but that does not mean they are adoptable. Sibling groups don't want to be broken up. Any kid in foster care has probably been abused or neglected or worse and these situations can cause lifelong problems alot of people don't feel prepared to undertake.
3) too many evil women know they can pretend to want to place a child for adoption and they take money for medical care, clothes, lodging, etc while they are pregnant, knowing all the while they have no obligation to hand over the child after birth. Some women do this several times and some longing couples get scammed over and over until they try to foreign adoptions.
I just have to laugh out loud at the posters who say it is easier to adopt overseas. Boy what a laugh.
Friends of mine adopted 2 American kids and did a wonderful job. I admire them for doing so and understand what the OP is stating.
There are so many kids in the US system that need a home, so why not first help out in this country and than go to other countries....
I have nothing against other cultures so don't call me a racist...I can understand that people of different backgrounds, race might have different interest for maybe their own race, which is perfectly fine and maybe better for the child later in life....but I'm not an expert.
I'm just feeling sorry for the kids who are growing up and never get to be adopted and watching tv and looking at people adopting from far away while these kids are neglected....
Bentlebee, my good friend with whom I agree on most things, did you not read the previous posts? They did a much better job than I could of explaining why people do foreign adoptions. People who are not infertile have NO NO NO idea of what adoption is all about. It's not like you just walk down to the agency and sign up for a baby and then get one a little while later.
As to interracial adoption, this is a grey area for me. On the one hand, children need a home, but on the other hand, culture and identity are also important to preserve. I would never want a Jewish child going to a non Jewish home, but if the only other option were to languish in a substandard orphanage, well, I'd have to pick the former choice. As much as possible, children should remain within homes that can provide them the same cultural and racial and religious identity.
I know this an old thread but too many people making foolish statement filled with errors.
1) It is not easier to adopt overseas than America. In fact it is about 100 time harder. Remember you are dealing with two different languages, governments(one can be communist), cultures, attitudes about adoption, lots of unethical people involved in overseas adoptiong, stack and stacks of paperwork all in triplicate needing useless stamps, bribes and off the wall fees, etc. Overseas adoptions are a nightmare and many people have had thousands of dollars scammed and now waiting times are unreal and in some cases children are ill yet the prospective parents are lied to.
2) There are not millions of adoptable children in America. Yes there are many kids in foster care but that does not mean they are adoptable. Sibling groups don't want to be broken up. Any kid in foster care has probably been abused or neglected or worse and these situations can cause lifelong problems alot of people don't feel prepared to undertake.
3) too many evil women know they can pretend to want to place a child for adoption and they take money for medical care, clothes, lodging, etc while they are pregnant, knowing all the while they have no obligation to hand over the child after birth. Some women do this several times and some longing couples get scammed over and over until they try to foreign adoptions.
I just have to laugh out loud at the posters who say it is easier to adopt overseas. Boy what a laugh.
I agree with most of your points, but in some cases, it really is much easier to adopt from overseas. I have seen it happen time and again with friends. But I agree that often the foreign agencies scam couples and lie about the child's condition, and I know a number of families who have ended up with damaged Russian children who made their lives a living hell and who broke up marriages and families with their pathologies that would not seem to respond despite a lot of love and commitment and therapy. Some stories are just sad; some kids are just not salvageable. None of us want to believe it, but it's true.
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