Tired of the Coffee Party and the Tea Party? We’re the newest game in town!
I woke up this morning and realized I didn’t want tea or coffee. I wanted hot cocoa!
So I turned on my computer and in a few minutes founded a new political movement —
The Cocoa Party!
Yes, it was that simple.
Then I got one of my friends at the newspaper where I used to work to violate all professional journalistic ethics by writing a puff-piece about me without revealing that I used to work there. Thanks!
Now, in between fielding 100 emails an hour from new members wanting to start chapters from Wasilla to Waco, Twittering 17 witty tweets per minute, fielding calls from TV producers and journalists, and weeping with joy and sincerity about our wonderful country, I barely have time to consider that I’ve just revolutionized politics — all before lunch!
But enough about me. This is about The Cocoa Party!
MISSION: The Cocoa Party Movement gives voice to Americans who want to see chocolate in government.
We are 100% weedroots. No astroturf Obama-campaigning former New York Times employees in the Cocoa Movement, no sirree! No grassroots racist fascist redneck Neanderthal Teabaggers either! And no hyper-partisan strategists calling the shots in this movement.
We are a spontaneous and collective expression of our desire to forge a culture of ludicrous propaganda that is entirely blame-oriented.
So abandon your deeply held beliefs and principles and join our 100% authentic political uprising today!
Funny satire, it could have been The Onion but it wasn't:
Zombie » Join the Cocoa Party!
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