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Old 03-24-2010, 09:35 AM
 
Location: Geneva, IL
12,977 posts, read 13,458,041 times
Reputation: 14843

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jadex View Post
Do you think every law is the right thing?

How would you feel if this was your child? What if something happened to her while this was being done. What if something happened to this child on the way to or from getting this done.

How would you feel if this were your daughter.
Sorry, I edited my reply to include that.

I would hope my daughter would turn to me first if she was in a crisis, but if she felt she couldn't, I would understand her turning to someone who could help her. This age of consent for birth control and abortion legislated this way is not uncommon, and for good reason. This is not always about a naughty 15 year-old, but also incest and sexual assault. Some parents would rather lay down the law and say no than realize their children are still going to have sex or have abortions, but will now do it outside the bounds of safety and control, leading to devastating consequences.

If you have a good, honest, open relationship with your child, this is not something you need worry about, and it will never affect you or your family.

If you have a troubled relationship with your teen, and you have no interest in honest, open communication, and tell them they are not allowed to have sex until they are married, then yes, this probably applies to you.

Last edited by Zimbochick; 03-24-2010 at 10:18 AM..
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Old 03-24-2010, 10:14 AM
 
Location: Texas
5,872 posts, read 7,503,350 times
Reputation: 2967
Quote:
Originally Posted by jcarlilesiu View Post
Since when is a 15 year old capable and mature enough to make life decisions? How about we allow all 15 year olds the ability to carry a gun to school too, since some people think they are mature enough to know how to handle one.

Parents have a right to know, and agree to, any procedure being conducted on a minor they are gardians over. End of story.

Apparently she was old enough to make a life decision, you're just not happy with the 2nd decision on that life she made.

However, I do agree with you that a parent should and does have a right to know about any procedure being conducted on their minor children, especially during school hours and for a procedure that was not set up by the custodial parent.
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Old 03-24-2010, 10:15 AM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,109 posts, read 28,774,413 times
Reputation: 16328
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rita Mordio View Post
The mother should have been notified because of health risks and so she could be "on the lookout" for any problems should they arise. But, if the girl was "of the age to consent" per the laws, then the mother should try and get it changed.

I find it interesting that the mother claimed her daughter was a pro-life advocate. I guess the girl changed her tune when she found herself 15 and facing the consequences of pregnancy. Not generalizing... but that is quite interesting.
I have a friend who is a STAUNCH pro life advocate. Ya know, one of those people who stand outside clinics yelling at people and she's been doing this since she was 14 or so. She had an abortion at 17, then continued on her pro life tirades. I asked her why she had an abortion and she said 'she could do more good without a child than with one'. I've always been confused about her statement...she was essentially trying to ban a procedure she got done out of convenience.

Pro Lifers are weird.

I would also feel like a failure if my daughter felt more comfortable talking to a stranger at school than her own mother when it came to birth control and pregnancy. Me and my parents always had open communication.
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Old 03-24-2010, 10:16 AM
 
8,743 posts, read 10,929,464 times
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I am very strongly pro choice but even I admit this is going too far. I would be pissed if this was my 15 year old.

Quote:
Originally Posted by JetJockey View Post
I have a friend who is a STAUNCH pro life advocate. Ya know, one of those people who stand outside clinics yelling at people and she's been doing this since she was 14 or so. She had an abortion at 17, then continued on her pro life tirades. I asked her why she had an abortion and she said 'she could do more good without a child than with one'. I've always been confused about her statement...she was essentially trying to ban a procedure she got done out of convenience.

Pro Lifers are weird.

I would also feel like a failure if my daughter felt more comfortable talking to a stranger at school than her own mother when it came to birth control and pregnancy. Me and my parents always had open communication.
Sounds like my good friends mom. It is beyond insane. The "pro life" stance is a joke and most of them are hypocrites in the biggest sense. It is unbelievable. Normally I would laugh them off and dismiss them but they are trying to interfere with womens bodies.
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Old 03-24-2010, 10:17 AM
 
1,183 posts, read 2,707,938 times
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What I find truly amazing it the high school won't give my kids a TYLENOL for a headache. But they'll set up a surgical procedure...an abortion?
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Old 03-24-2010, 10:36 AM
 
42,727 posts, read 27,419,260 times
Reputation: 14312
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jadex View Post
Do you think every law is the right thing?

How would you feel if this was your child? What if something happened to her while this was being done. What if something happened to this child on the way to or from getting this done.

How would you feel if this were your daughter.
Honestly, I would be furious and deeply hurt. With my daughter and with the legal system that allowed my daughter to go around me.

But I don't think it would have been right for the mother to force the 15-year old daughter to go through with a pregnancy, either.

I hope that the mother, when she has worked through the anger and hurt, will forge a stronger relationship with her daughter, and try to understand why her daughter made the choice that she did.
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Old 03-24-2010, 10:41 AM
 
13,055 posts, read 12,229,763 times
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Sorry, foot to arse, there is the door. If you are old enough to go around me, disrespect me in this way, then you are old enough to earn your own living and make those decisions yourself.

Since the state was so intrusive, the state can take care of her.
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Old 03-24-2010, 10:41 AM
 
1,476 posts, read 1,884,426 times
Reputation: 703
Quote:
Originally Posted by mississippimagnolia View Post
What I find truly amazing it the high school won't give my kids a TYLENOL for a headache. But they'll set up a surgical procedure...an abortion?
And if something goes wrong, who is there with the child? And if there are follow up expenses, who pays for them? And equally important, what about the risidual emotional damage? This is just NOT right.
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Old 03-24-2010, 10:47 AM
 
42,727 posts, read 27,419,260 times
Reputation: 14312
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nomander View Post
Sorry, foot to arse, there is the door. If you are old enough to go around me, disrespect me in this way, then you are old enough to earn your own living and make those decisions yourself.

Since the state was so intrusive, the state can take care of her.
I don't think any mother who truly loves her daughter could say this and mean it. The anger is appropriate, but part of that anger is because a mother feels so responsible for the safety and well-being of her child. The anger comes from fear, fear that the child could have been hurt or could have possibly died, and betrayal that when we send our children to school we expect them to keep our children safe and to return them to us each night in the same condition that they were when they left for school that morning. If that is true, then when something happens like this, you don't want to throw your child out the door, you want to hold them even closer. If this woman's anger is about her daughter, then this is how she feels. If this woman's anger is about a political issue, then that may explain why the bond between mother and daughter is so fragile that the daughter went around her mother.
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Old 03-24-2010, 10:55 AM
 
Location: Geneva, IL
12,977 posts, read 13,458,041 times
Reputation: 14843
Quote:
Originally Posted by DC at the Ridge View Post
I don't think any mother who truly loves her daughter could say this and mean it. The anger is appropriate, but part of that anger is because a mother feels so responsible for the safety and well-being of her child. The anger comes from fear, fear that the child could have been hurt or could have possibly died, and betrayal that when we send our children to school we expect them to keep our children safe and to return them to us each night in the same condition that they were when they left for school that morning. If that is true, then when something happens like this, you don't want to throw your child out the door, you want to hold them even closer. If this woman's anger is about her daughter, then this is how she feels. If this woman's anger is about a political issue, then that may explain why the bond between mother and daughter is so fragile that the daughter went around her mother.
I think this is exactly why some teens do seek out birth control or abortion without their parent's knowledge though, because they know exactly what response they are going to get. Sounds to me like a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation.
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