Portland rated dead last as America's manliest city (employment, incomes)

[fearnofish]

Originally Posted by pirate_lafitte

But why should manliness be measured this way. Being a man shouldn't be about having muscles and being a "meathead". Being a man is about living up to your responsibilities. It is about courage, not from being big and strong, but from inside one's heart. It isn't about being an "alpha-male". Being a man should come from your heart. It is about a father being there for his child the whole way. Anyone can lift weights. Anyone can act like a meathead. It is about what you would do if the chips were down. That should be the measure of a man.

You have a couple valid points. With the experiences I have had dealing with the fine residents of Portland that partake in 'medical marijuana' and overall hippy-ness they do give off the illusion of being very manly. I never said you have to be a "meat head", that is not what I picture when i picture someone who is manly either. Just given the overall impression Portland portrays it is not a very manly city. The Mayor and his actions in the media also do not help project a manly image of the city in my opinion.

[hamellr]

Why does Portland want to be viewed as a manly city again?

Personally I think Estacada, Port Orford, Charleston, Lakeview, Frenchglen, Enterprise, when I think manly.

That is unless you want to use the 19th Century Definition of manly, then Portland feels quite manly that way although it still falls rather short.

[Mclaurin]

Hey, the men around here are all babes. So there.

[Nimbus09]

Originally Posted by HowGoesIt

Just think, would you find a woman attractive if she didn't possess any feminine characteristics? If a woman didn't shave her legs, didn't cook, and couldn't be seductive when the right time comes, I highly doubt she would find a quality guy.

Wait, women still cook and are seductive at times? I don't buhhhlieve it!

Women can be so attractive in so many ways. If you go to work and come back telling me you got a raise or won that contract, that would turn me into a slobbering hound.

Same if I get home to a homemade dinner that I can enjoy with the lady after a long day.

Respect to those ladies out there that take care of business and don't just sit around watching tv all day.

[Nimbus09]

Originally Posted by pirate_lafitte

It is about what you would do if the chips were down. That should be the measure of a man.

Have to comment on this as I had a serious argument over it with my psycho ex.

Somehow we got to her asking me "so, you don't think you need to share with your wife if there is a chance you will get fired or laid off at work?". I told her if there were anything I can do to not have that happen, then I would not tell her because there is no need to make her worry.

I can see both sides to the argument, but I still stick to what I said because, as a man, it would be MY responsibility to do something about the situation either way it could have gone.

Tell-tale signs of a control freak which I later discovered she was. Trust is important and situations like what I just described require it and if a woman really believes what I just quoted, then that's awesome. Plus, I thought being in control and not panicking was always a good quality wasn't it?

[waitnolonger]

Originally Posted by Nimbus09

Have to comment on this as I had a serious argument over it with my psycho ex.

Somehow we got to her asking me "so, you don't think you need to share with your wife if there is a chance you will get fired or laid off at work?". I told her if there were anything I can do to not have that happen, then I would not tell her because there is no need to make her worry.

I can see both sides to the argument, but I still stick to what I said because, as a man, it would be MY responsibility to do something about the situation either way it could have gone.

Tell-tale signs of a control freak which I later discovered she was. Trust is important and situations like what I just described require it and if a woman really believes what I just quoted, then that's awesome. Plus, I thought being in control and not panicking was always a good quality wasn't it?

Psycho or not, I just have to say that I'm with your ex 100% on this. You're saying there's no need to tell her that there's a good chance you might lose your job because you don't want to make her worry? That's some seriously backwards thinking. If my husband got laid off, then told me he knew this might be coming for awhile but didn't want to worry me about it, I would pretty much lose it. I promise I'm not psycho, but marriage is a partnership, and I find it demeaning to have a husband who keeps things from me because he thinks I couldn't handle bad news.

[green_mariner]

Originally Posted by Nimbus09

Have to comment on this as I had a serious argument over it with my psycho ex.

Somehow we got to her asking me "so, you don't think you need to share with your wife if there is a chance you will get fired or laid off at work?". I told her if there were anything I can do to not have that happen, then I would not tell her because there is no need to make her worry.

I can see both sides to the argument, but I still stick to what I said because, as a man, it would be MY responsibility to do something about the situation either way it could have gone.

Tell-tale signs of a control freak which I later discovered she was. Trust is important and situations like what I just described require it and if a woman really believes what I just quoted, then that's awesome. Plus, I thought being in control and not panicking was always a good quality wasn't it?

If it was that case, I would go looking for another job or try to start a business,so such a case won't have to happen. I would argue that part of being a man, or a human being in general,is doing what it right, even if it costs you everything.

[Nimbus09]

Originally Posted by waitnolonger

Psycho or not, I just have to say that I'm with your ex 100% on this. You're saying there's no need to tell her that there's a good chance you might lose your job because you don't want to make her worry? That's some seriously backwards thinking. If my husband got laid off, then told me he knew this might be coming for awhile but didn't want to worry me about it, I would pretty much lose it. I promise I'm not psycho, but marriage is a partnership, and I find it demeaning to have a husband who keeps things from me because he thinks I couldn't handle bad news.

The perfect response to this is:

Originally Posted by pirate_lafitte

If it was that case, I would go looking for another job or try to start a business,so such a case won't have to happen. I would argue that part of being a man, or a human being in general,is doing what it right, even if it costs you everything.

Having a backup plan is something I would expect of myself too. Like I said, it's all about being in control of the situation and pirate seems to understand that. I would not trying to hide anything, just trying to say I'm responsible enough to look at a situation from all angles and come up with the best possible solution. After all, it's my career and I'm the most qualified to make decisions on it. Looking into another job if my current job were threatened is something any logical person would do and, therefore, would not need to worry about it themselves let alone others.

Like I said, I can see the other side of the argument, but it, in my opinion, still is the weaker one. So what if I do tell you? I'll still be the one having to make the decision and I am the more informed one so my decision will be the one that goes. What will you do? Yell at me, start worrying, and think I'm not a man because I can't keep a job. Even if I TOLD you what the plan to handle things was, action speaks louder than words so I'd rather not until I DO get that new job.

[waitnolonger]

I don't have any problem with the possible plan of action. Being proactive and looking for a new job definitely seems like the most sensible thing to do, I agree. It's just keeping it from your wife that I take issue with. In fact, the decision to look for a new job in itself seems like something that should be discussed with your wife. And if you're doing it mainly because you think you may lose your current job, even more so.

[Minervah]

Yell at me, start worrying, and think I'm not a man because I can't keep a job.

My goodness, in this day and age and especially in cities like Portland where layoffs are a dime a dozen, what does gender have to do with anything? My female friends have been layed off just as frequently as my male friends. This doesn't make females any less female any more than a man losing his job would make him any less of a man.

This sounds like a throwback to the 50's thinking: women stayed home and depended upon their husbands for financial support. Now everyone works. Or tries to.

I told her if there were anything I can do to not have that happen, then I would not tell her because there is no need to make her worry.

So let's say the shoe was on the other foot. If your spouse were to be in danger of losing her job wouldn't you want to know about it? Just curious.